


now, look at where we are

by trouvailleamor



Series: The Breakfast Club [4]
Category: The Breakfast Club (1985)
Genre: Additional Warnings In Author's Note, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Bisexual Brian Johnson, F/M, Fluff, Future Fic, Implied Sexual Content, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Kid Fic, Minor Character Death, Slice of Life
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-27
Updated: 2021-03-07
Packaged: 2021-03-09 20:54:06
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 49,012
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27732598
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/trouvailleamor/pseuds/trouvailleamor
Summary: "You want to see something funny? Go visit John Bender in five years."The breakfast club five, then ten years in the future.
Relationships: Andrew Clark/Allison Reynolds, Brian Johnson/Original Female Character(s), John Bender/Claire Standish
Series: The Breakfast Club [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/953703
Comments: 10
Kudos: 37





	1. 1989

**Author's Note:**

> Where are the members of the breakfast club five years in the future?

The first thing Claire sees when she opens her eyes is the empty space next to her. The sun is shining through the crack between the windowsill and the shade, so she knows it’s still morning, but her alarm hasn’t gone off yet. She rolls onto her back and stares up at the ceiling.

She doesn’t know how he can sneak out every morning. Every time she has to wake up before him, she manages to wake him up. She almost wishes he would wake her up, just so she could say goodbye. 

She pushes herself up on her arms and looks over at the clock. It’s quarter to seven, fifteen minutes before her alarms set to go off. Claire kicks off the sheets and places her feet on the floor. Her vision goes a little blurry and she leans forward.

She hasn’t been feeling well for the past week, her vision going blurry and frequently feeling nauseated. She’s been exhausted too, taking a nap whenever she’s not working. John thinks that she has the flu, but she disagrees. They sleep beside each other every night so she’s sure that if it was the flu, he would have it too. 

John is usually out of the house by the time Claire has to get ready for work, but on Fridays, Claire goes into the work before the sun even starts the rise. She’s vying for the head of sales position and volunteered to help her boss open on their busiest day. 

She leans down further and rests her forehead on her knees as her stomach lurches again. _It can’t continue like this_ , Claire thinks as she takes a deep breath through her nose. She’s working full time, but she’s also going to graduate school to further her business degree. Claire doesn’t have time to be sick, especially not right now. 

Claire launched directly into grad school after finishing her degree at Northwestern. She picked a school that was closer to home so she could finally move in with John. Her parents, especially her dad, had a major problem with it and still refuse to visit their apartment, but Claire knows she made the right decision. 

Long distance was hard and it got a lot harder her junior and senior year. John had just finished his two year trade school residency and began working full-time as a mechanic. He could no longer visit and they could only talk on the phone the rare night he had off. Claire didn’t think it was possible to miss someone so much it hurt, but those years, she held the loss of him in her chest. 

She missed her friends too, so as soon as she graduated from Northwestern, she moved back home to Shermer to be near John and the others. Well, everyone except for Allison.

When Claire lifts her head a touch, she feels bile climb up her throat. She rushes as fast as she can into their bathroom and is puking into the toilet before she can even process what’s happening.

Even though she’s been nauseous for about a week, she hasn’t actually thrown up until now. She wipes her mouth on the back of her hand and reaches up to flush the toilet. Standing up on shaky legs, Claire leans over and twists the shower faucet on. 

The warm water makes her feel more alive, but she’s still nauseous. When she gags again, she reluctantly makes the decision that she can’t go to work like this. She’d be useless to her boss and she doesn’t need him holding anything against her, not when she’s trying to get the promotion.

She really doesn’t want to miss work, but when she pukes again in the shower, she comes to terms with the fact that once she’s done, she’s calling out of work for the first time since she got the job.

~~  
Claire is sitting on the couch in their living room, drinking a cup of hot cocoa and watching afternoon soap operas when there’s a sharp knock at her door. Claire places the hot cup on the table and walks towards the door, wrapping her sweater around her body. The heat is on full blast, but the apartment is cold in the January weather. 

She looks in the peephole and when she sees who it is, she unlatches the chain and pulls the door open.

“Hey,” she says, stepping aside to let Andy in.

“Hey,” Andy says. “I was going to drop off my suit for Bender but I saw that your car was still out front. I thought you were supposed to be at work?”

“I am,” Claire says, shutting the door behind him and taking the hanger from Andy’s hand. John has an interview with a new garage for a better position. He hasn’t worn a suit since their graduation, so Andy offered to let him borrow the one he has. 

Andy is also in school still, but he’s studying law. He discovered after taking his prerequisites that he’s good at it and enjoys it, so he applied to law school as soon as he graduated. He’s got fancy clothes for every occasion and he’s the reason that her boyfriend refuses to buy button up shirts. He always says he can borrow one from Andy’s closet, which is what brought her friend to their apartment today.

“Thanks for this,” she says, laying it out on a dining room chair before leading Andy into the living room.

“Did Claire Standish actually take a day off of work? I can barely believe my eyes,” he says, smiling as he sits on the end of the couch. 

Claire sits down where she was before, a cushion in between them. “Not of my free will,” Claire says. “I haven’t been feeling well lately.”

“I’m sorry,” Andy says. “What’s wrong?”

“I’ve been incredibly nauseous for days but I puked in the shower this morning,” she says. “I’m kind of dizzy too. Sorry if I’ve infected you.” She lets out a laugh, but he just looks at her blankly.

“Is Bender sick too?” Andy asks. Claire has no idea why he looks so serious, but she just shakes her head. 

“No, he’s fine. Maybe it’s something I ate,” she says, although she doesn’t believe it. It’s lasted too long for it to be food poisoning.

“Or you’re pregnant,” Andy says, and Claire is glad that she never picked her hot cocoa back up because she certainly would have dropped it.

“That’s funny,” Claire says, but Andy’s not laughing. 

“I’m being serious,” Andy says. “It may be nothing, but Christina had a scare last month and the doctor asked if she was experiencing those same symptoms.”

“Christina thought she was pregnant?” Claire asks. Claire doesn’t know Andy’s girlfriend very well and she also can’t imagine Andy having a child with her. She may be biased, though.

Andy lets out a shaky breath. “Yeah,” he says, running his hand through his hair. “Scariest day of my life.”

“I can imagine,” she says, furrowing her brow. She honestly never thought that her symptoms could be pregnancy related, mostly because she’s on birth control. She’s sure she isn’t, but Andy’s planted a seed in her head and she knows she won’t be able to stop thinking about it until she checks.

“I’m sure it’s nothing,” Andy assures her, patting her leg carefully. “But if you think it’s possible, go get a test.”

Claire doesn’t think it’s possible. But now that she thinks about it, it’s possible that she was so overworked and frazzled she forgot to take it a day…

“Well Andy, this has been entirely stressful. I think I need to go buy a test now just to calm my nerves, so I’m kicking you out.”

Andy laughs before standing up. Claire walks out with him, pulling her boots and her jacket on and grabbing her keys. As he pulls away, she sits in her car and twists the keys into the ignition. 

She turns the heat up so it’s blasting.

~~  
When Bender parks in his parking spot outside of his apartment, he notices that he has a streak of grease across his forehead. As he looks at himself in the rearview mirror, he also notices that he looks incredibly tired. Only two more days until the weekend. He can make it until then. Especially since him and Claire have a hotel reservation in Chicago for Saturday night. It’ll be nice to get away. 

He walks up the stairs to their apartment and opens the door. He shuts it behind him and toes off his boots. The first thing he sees is Claire asleep on the couch, bundled up in blankets. Bender smiles softly at the sight and he would go over and kiss her, but he’s covered in car grease and knows that she’d berate him if he got her dirty. 

He walks into their room and pulls off his flannel. He tosses it in the hamper, the same one that Claire bought him for his first apartment. He misses that place, his first real home, but it was too big for just him when Allison left. 

Bender sees that the bed is still unmade, which is unusual. Claire makes their bed almost every morning, the only exception being Fridays. He wonders if she’s feeling alright and decides that he’s going to make her favorite dinner tonight if they have the ingredients.

Bender’s soft for this girl, he always has been. Lately though, it’s been more overpowering. Ever since he bought the ring, he’s been feeling more and more like he wants to give her the world. 

He pulls off his shirt and heads into the bathroom. He’s about to turn the water on when something in the trashcan catches his eye. His first thought is a question: _Why is there a small chemistry set in the trash?_. His brain catches up to him and he realizes what it is - a pregnancy test. 

He feels the blood rush down to his feet. He doesn’t remember doing it, but he ends up back in the living room, shirtless and holding a piece of paper. Claire blinks awake and squints at him.

“Hi,” she says, stretching her arms above her head and sitting up.

“Was it positive?” He asks, not even thinking.

Claire blinks up at him and then notices he’s holding the instruction manual for the pregnancy test he found in the trashcan. Then, she suddenly looks like she’s on the verge of tears.

“I was going to tell you. You didn’t have to dig through the trash.”

“Tell me what?”

She visibly swallows and Bender can see that she’s shaking. “It was positive.”

Just like that, all thoughts leave Bender’s head. It takes him a few seconds for it to sink in that _positive means pregnant. Claire’s pregnant._. It takes another few seconds for him to realize that the kid is _his_ and that he’s going to be a _dad_. He doesn’t register that Claire is standing in front of him and has her hand on his cheek until she’s pulling it away. 

“John, please say something. Let me know that this is okay,” she whispers and he tries, but his throat doesn’t cooperate. 

He feels pulled out of himself, like he’s not in control of his body anymore. The only thought in his head, on a loop, is _I can’t be a father_.

He doesn’t realize that Claire has left until the front door of their apartment slams shut.

~~  
Brian is sitting at his computer when he hears the doorbell ring. He trips over a box as he makes his way to the door. His entire apartment, the main floor of a duplex, is completely packed up. He’s moving next week and the only things that aren’t packed are his computer and the sheets on the mattress upstairs.

He isn’t sure exactly who he expected it to be and for what reason, but he definitely wasn’t expecting a tear-stained Claire. He doesn’t say anything, doesn’t need to, and just ushers her inside. Once he gets her sitting, on his bed because everything else is packed, she lets out a sob and lets her head drop to her hands. 

Brian first wants to ask if someone died, but thinks better of it and instead says “Is it Bender?”

When she sobs harder, Brian gets his answer. He has to force himself not to roll his eyes. Claire and Bender are soulmates, he’s never been more sure of anything, but Brian feels like he has to stop Claire from having an insecurity-driven meltdown over the boy often. Claire’s his best friend, so he doesn’t mind talking her through things, but he’s beginning to feel like they have the same conversation at least once a year. 

He doesn’t think Claire will feel confident in her relationship until Bender proposes, which thankfully will be soon. But Brian can’t blame her, the love from her parents is purely conditional. Brian knows that she really has nothing to worry about because Bender is completely devoted to her.

“Claire, what’s wrong?” Brian asks, rubbing a supportive hand on her back. 

“God Brian, I really fucked up this time,” Claire says, hands muffling her speech. 

Brian’s heard her say that before, but she really was his rock during his last break up so he keeps his patience. “I’m sure it’s not that bad,” he says. Brian talked to Bender a few days ago and he told him he was planing on proposing over the weekend. Brian can’t imagine anything could derail that plan.

“I’m pregnant,” Claire says and she dissolves into another fit of sobs. Brian’s stunned silent. He certainly wasn’t expecting _that_.

“Holy shit,” he says, unhelpfully.

“Oh God, Brian. He’s going to leave me. You should have seen his face.”

Brian can imagine. Bender’s got so much baggage when it comes to parents and he can see him shutting down because of something unexpected like this. However, as well as Brian knows Claire, he also knows Bender.

“Claire, he’s not going to dump you. Trust me on this.”

Claire probably doesn’t believe him, but she leans her head on his shoulder. Brian reaches up and pats her curls, trying to comfort her the best he can. Claire may not realize, she probably isn’t able to think clearly, but Bender would never abandon his child. Never. And he definitely wouldn’t abandon her.

They sit like that for a while, Claire’s tears soaking through Brian’s shirt. Brian is beginning to think that they’re going to be sitting here all day when his phone rings. His bedside table is packed, so it’s sitting on the floor. Claire moves her head off of him so he can reach over and pick the phone up.

Brian doesn’t even get out a hello before Bender is talking in his ear. “Bri? Have you seen Claire? I’ve called Andy and Patrick but they haven’t seen her.”

“She’s here, Bender,” he says, looking at Claire. “She’s alright.”

Bender lets out a deep sigh. “Thank God. She just took off.” The worry in his voice is palpable.

“She’s alright,” he repeats.

“Can you send her ask her to come home? We gotta talk,” Bender says, and Brian can picture him running his hands through his hair. “I’m assuming you know about what.”

“Uh, yeah. It may have come up,” Brian says, rubbing Claire back while she stares blankly at the wall in front of them.

“Fuck,” he says. “If she’s alright to drive, can you please ask her to come back?”

“Yeah, man. I will,” he says and he hears the click on the other end. Brian hangs the phone up and hugs Claire tight.

“I’m assuming that was my boyfriend,” Claire sniffles.

Brian lets her go. “Claire, go home.”

Claire looks up at him, eyes red, and she nods.

~~  
Bender only stops fidgeting when Claire walks through the front door and stands in front of him. She’s been crying, her eyes are puffy and red, and she is holding her hands together behind her back. Bender knows that he didn’t react well before, he was in shock, but he plans to fix it now.

“Come sit,” he says, patting on the cushion next to him. She walks over slowly and sinks into the couch, crossing her arms over her chest. “I’m sorry,” he says.

“Sorry about what?” She says, avoiding his eyes.

“For how I reacted earlier,” Bender says. “Although, to be fair Sweets, you did leave it in the trash for me to find.”

Claire lifts her chin up indignantly. “If I was thinking clearly, I wouldn’t have left it there.”

Bender sighs, then reaches over and takes her hand. He doesn’t know what he’s supposed to say. He figures that whatever he says won’t be the right thing, but he needs to say something. Rubbing her fingers back and forth with his thumb, he lets out another sigh.

“Do you want to keep it?” Bender asks and Claire nods vigorously.

“Yes,” she says. “I want it.”

He’s secretly relieved. He doesn’t know why, because he doesn’t feel ready, but it feels right because it’s happening with Claire. If it were anyone else, he would feel completely hopeless. Claire has become the person he plans his life around, and now she’s having his kid.

“I was going to ask you to marry me, you know.”

Claire hums neutrally, still not looking at him. “Was?”

“Well, yeah,” he says. “If I did it now, it would seem like a shotgun sort of situation.”

Claire smiles softly. “John Bender getting married? That’s pretty much an oxymoron.” 

Bender has known for as long as they’ve been together that Claire is one of those people who idealizes marriage. She wants the traditional life and she always has, one person to stay with for the rest of her life. He also knows that Claire is surprised that he’s stayed around this long, given how much he craved the opposite when they first met that day in detention.

Claire trusts him now, he knows she does. But having a kid with your high school sweetheart at the age of 22 has never been the plan, especially since they haven’t even made it to their 5 year anniversary yet, and he can tell that she’s expecting him to bolt. 

“Do you think we’ll be good parents?” Bender asks, squeezing her fingers. John has thought a lot about the type of parent he’d be, especially given the way he was brought up. His mother left and his dad beat him. He doesn’t want to fuck a kid up the way his parents did.

“I don’t know,” Claire whispers, “but I think we’ve got a pretty good idea of what not to do.”

Bender lets out a low laugh. “True enough,” he says. He watches his girlfriend as she pretends not to notice he’s doing it. She looks tired, like today physically sucked the life out of her. He can tell that she’s scared, and he is too, but he supposes it’s more real for her right now. The theoretical implications have hit him, but reality seems so far away. “Come on,” he says, “let’s go to bed.”

Claire’s lying on her side in their bed, facing away from him. He’s lying on his back, shirtless and restless. They aren’t touching and Claire’s pretending that she’s asleep, but her breathing is shallow. John reaches over and lightly traces a finger over her shoulder blade.

After a moment, he asks, “Would you have said yes?”

She’s quiet, and at first John thinks she’s going to pretend she didn’t hear him, but she inhales deeply and says, “Yes.”

He rolls over and wraps an arm around her middle. He pulls her closer and presses a soft kiss to the back of her neck. “I love you, you know,” he mumbles into her hair. He doesn’t say it often enough, but in this moment he needs her to hear it, to know it.

Claire twists herself in his arms so they’re nose to nose, his arm still draped over her side. “Are we really going to do this?” She whispers. “Can we do this?”

John leans in and presses a light kiss to her lips. “Yes, I think so,” he says simply.

She reaches up and tangles her fingers in his hair. It’s shorter now and there’s less for her to latch on to. “I love you too,” she says.

Bender kisses her again, harder this time. Somewhere between pressing against her lips and pulling away, John’s brain makes a decision for him. “Marry me,” he whispers, their lips touching as he says the words.

“Don’t,” Claire says, pulling back, “don’t do it like this.”

Bender only smiles. “The ring is at Andy’s apartment. I didn’t want to leave it here because I knew you’d find it. I was planning on asking you this weekend in Chicago. I can get down on my knee tomorrow, if that’s what you want.”

Claire opens her mouth and then promptly shuts it. She opens it again and manages to say, “Are you being serious?”

“Of course I’m being serious,” he says. “I’m not that cruel.”

“But,” she says, and Bender manages to hold in the sigh that threatens to come out. He didn’t realize it would take so much effort to convince her. “You don’t want to get married.”

Bender can’t remember if he’s ever said that out loud, but he’s pretty sure that Claire has filled this detail in her mind subconsciously. Sure, his parents weren’t happily married and his mom left, but it wasn’t marriage itself that was the problem. Maybe Claire got the impression that he was against marriage in detention, back she he was only considering girls and not dating them. But they’ve been together for almost five years and John honestly thought that Claire knew that he wasn’t going anywhere.

And what does she expect? That he’s going to leave her to raise their kid alone? That he’s going to stand by while she meets and marries some other guy to raise his kid with? That he’s just going to leave her like she means nothing?

“I want to get married to _you_ ,” he says. “When I bought the ring, I didn’t realize it would take this much convincing.”

Claire looks straight into his eyes and he lets her. They’ve been together for so long that they can read each other, they can know what the other person is thinking without ever speaking it out loud. Whatever she sees there must satisfy her because she leans forward and kisses him again, soft and slow.

“Okay,” Claire says and Bender can’t help the smile that takes over his face. “Let’s do this.”

~~  
Claire wakes up the next morning much like she did the morning before, except that instead being alone, Bender is still there and his arms are still wrapped around her. He must have taken the day off. It takes her a few seconds to remember the events of yesterday, and when she does, she feels a tickle of anxiety but also a hint of excitement. 

It’s too early, they’re not married, and it doesn’t exactly fit into her plan, but she’s _having a baby_ and she’s having it with her boyfriend. Her _fiance_ , she corrects herself when she remembers the informal proposal. 

She rubs her hand up and down his arm and he buries his head deeper into her hair. Smiling softly, she turns and presses a soft kiss to his forehead. Careful not to wake him, she slips out of his arms. She grabs his t-shirt off the floor and pulls it over her head, then walks out into the kitchen, closing the bedroom door behind her. 

She grabs the phone off the wall and dials the number from memory. It’s early, but Claire knows she’ll be up. She doesn’t sleep much, even now. It rings twice before the phone clicks.

“Hello?”

“Allison,” Claire says. “I’ve got news.”

~~  
Brian sits at Claire and Bender’s kitchen table, watching Bender chop vegetables. If Brian from high school was transported here he probably wouldn’t believe his eyes, but Bender discovered after school that he really enjoyed cooking. 

It’s almost the fifth anniversary of their friend group and Brian has been thrown into the world of wedding planning. Claire keeps calling him with ideas and Brian listens because he knows she’s missing talking about girl things with Allison. They still talk to her, but not often enough.

Claire has never really clicked with Andy’s new girlfriend Christina, and if Brian’s being honest, neither has he. She’s nice enough, but she’s not Allison. So, Brian listens to Claire’s rants about flower arrangements and offers support when needed. 

“How was your date?” Bender asks as he transfers the cut vegetables into a pan. 

Brian groans. “It was fine. I don’t think she’ll call again, though.”

“No?” Bender asks.

“I’m fine with it,” he says. “She wasn’t really my type anyway.”

“That’s too bad,” Bender says. “Too bad things didn’t work out with Greg. I liked him.”

Brian rolls his eyes again. Discovering he was bisexual in college was scary and he was almost completely sure that his friends back home would have trouble understanding it. He was wrong, Bender calling him “Big Bi Bri” on occasion and the others being as supportive as they could be. Claire had him talk with her brother, which was an incredibly awkward conversation but a necessary one. 

Brian has double the options for dating and he somehow has still ended up as the fifth wheel. “Well, he didn’t like me in the end.”

“Sorry, Bri,” Bender says, pouring olive oil on the vegetables and taking it over to the stove. 

“It’s fine,” he says. “Allie called me yesterday.”

Bender nods slowly, flicking the stove top on. “That’s nice. We haven’t heard from her in a while.”

Brian stares at the back of his head. His hair is shorter now, cutting it after he complained about it getting in the way when he was working. “I miss her.”

“I do too,” Bender says, giving the vegetables in the pan a stir. 

“Do you think she’ll ever come back?”

“I don’t know,” Bender says. “I don’t know what she could say to make it better.”

Not for the first time, Brian’s heart breaks for Andy. He has Christina now, and it’s better, but it isn’t perfect. It never will be. 

~~  
When Claire gets home, her ankles are swollen and she’s absolutely exhausted. Her day at work felt like it dragged on forever. She pushes into her apartment and instantly smells Bender’s cooking. Brian’s at the table and he smiles at her.

“Hey,” Claire says, dropping her purse on the ground. She has just started to show but she can still hide it if she dresses in baggy clothes. She walks up behind Bender, who’s cooking on the stovetop, and presses a kiss to his cheek.

“Hey,’ Bender says. “Go sit down.”

Claire wants to roll her eyes because Bender has been overprotective and extra caring since she found out she was pregnant and especially since she started showing. She doesn’t though, because she really is tired. She pulls out the chair next to Brian and sinks into it.

“How was work?” Brian asks.

“Long,” she says. In the couple of months since she found out she was pregnant, she’d been promoted to head of sales. Her hours are longer and she has more responsibilities, but she loves what she’s doing. “Is Andy on his way?”

“That’s what he said when I called him,” Brian says.

“Bri, wanna get the plates out?” Bender asks over his shoulder. While Brian sets the table, there’s a knock at the door. 

Claire moves, slowly but methodically, towards the door. When she works long shifts on her feet all day, she has trouble moving around. She pulls the door open and sees Andy standing there, holding a case of beers. 

“Hey,” he says, side hugging Claire as he walks in. He’s wearing a dress shirt and tie, likely coming from his desk job. He’s working while going through school like Claire is and he’s halfway through his accelerated law program. 

When Andy was applying to schools, Bender joked that he was picking accelerated programs so he could get out of of Illinois as fast as he could. When Andy didn’t deny it, the joke got a lot less funny. Claire knows that it’s irrational for her to hope that her friends will always be nearby, but after Allison left so unexpectedly, she gets anxious whenever anyone else in their group mentions moving away. She’s not stupid either; she knows that the reason Andy wants to leave is Allison.

“Hey,” she says, following him into the kitchen. 

“Hey, Sporto,” Bender says as he serves the meal. “Take a seat.”

They try to do group dinners as often as they can, especially now that Claire is pregnant. Once she has the baby, they become real adults. Claire feels sometimes like they’re still clinging to their high school days.

They eat and chat, mostly about work. Brian moved right after Claire found out she was pregnant and he lives closer to the city now. He’s starting a new job soon, something in computers that Claire doesn’t understand at all. Claire talks about her new position, doing sales commissions for the beauty company she works for. She has dreams of starting her own line of beauty products someday, but for now, she’s happy doing what she’s doing.

Claire is about to go for a second serving when the phone rings in the kitchen. She makes quick eye contact with Bender and she sees her thoughts reflected on her face. The only people who call them are their bosses, her parents, and occasionally Laurie, but it’s too late to hear from work, her mother called her earlier, and Laurie is out of town. 

Claire picks up the phone and says, “Hello?”

“Hey, Claire,” a voice says and Claire meets Bender’s eyes again. It’s Allison and Andy doesn’t know that they’re still in contact with her. “Is this a good time?”

“Actually, we’re eating dinner with Brian and Andy right now. Can I call you back?” She tries to keep her voice low and she can hear Bender talking louder than normal. 

“Oh, yeah,” Allison says and she clears her throat. “How… Um, how are they?”

“They’re good,” she says. She wonders why she’s asking now when she never has before. In fact, in the two and a half years since Allison left, she’s never once asked about Andy. “Listen, I’ll call you later. Okay?”

“I’m actually not home right now, so you won’t be able to reach me,” Allison says. “I’ll call you soon.”

“Okay,” Claire says. She’s learned not to question the things Allison says anymore. “I’ll talk to you soon.”

Allison hangs the phone up with a click and Claire does the same. When she rejoins the table, Bender is telling an animated story about the new trainee at his garage. She’s taking a sip of water when Andy leans over.

“Was that Laurie?” Andy asks. He’s just as surprised as she is that her and Laurie remained friends after graduation. They lost touch for a bit during college but both ended up in Shermer after they graduated. She’s moved away near the city now, but they still talk regularly. 

Claire doesn’t know why she doesn’t just lie, but she finds that she can’t. “No. She’s on a business trip actually.”

“Oh,” Andy says, and Claire realizes that Bender and Brian have stopped talking. “Who was it then?”

Claire knows that he’s only asking because he already knows, she can tell by the look on his face. She looks up again and catches Bender’s eye. He raises a brow as if to challenge her. Claire doesn’t think she can lie about this anymore; she’s felt the secret weighing on her for over two years. “Uh,” she says, trying to figure out what to say.

“Just say it,” he says. “Please.”

Claire sighs. “Andy-“

“She’s calling your apartment? How does she even have your number?” Andy looks angry, more angry than Claire expected he would be. Christina has been his girlfriend for almost a year now and she thought that him being in a new relationship may have dulled the pain of his break up with Allison.

“She gave us hers,” Claire whispers.

Claire watches as Andy’s jaw tenses. She shifts her glance to Brian who presses his lips together and shakes his head. Claire knows this is about to blow up right in front of her and all she can do is helplessly watch.

“Where is she?” It’s not the question Claire was expecting him to ask, but it’s reasonable since she left him without a trace.

“California,” Bender answers for her. 

Andy takes in a stuttering breath. “And you’ve been in contact with her this whole time?” He looks at each of them and when they nod slowly, he stands up. “Thanks for dinner but I have to go.”

“Andy,” Claire says and she realizes now that she’s crying. 

“I have to go,” he says again, and then he’s gone. 

~~  
During his two years at community college, Andy lived with Allison and Bender. They were all in school at the time, Andy taking his prerequisites, Bender working through technical school, and Allison taking English classes. Even though he wasn’t wrestling anymore, Andy worked out often, jogging around the neighborhood. Life was good and he was very much in love.

Even though they were all in school and working, he still got to spend every night next to the girl he loved. Her room became his, his stuff accumulating in drawers and on surfaces over time. By the end of the two years, nothing of importance remained at his old house. 

In the winter of his second year at community college, Andy applied to Loyola University in Chicago to continue his schooling. He talked to Allison about it and she seemed happy for him. He didn’t notice at the time that she was becoming more withdrawn. 

The summer before he was set to start at his new school, Andy took Allison to a beach house on Lake Michigan for a long weekend. She brought her polaroid camera with her and took so many pictures that he thought he might go blind from the flash. 

They spent most of the weekend in bed, even though Andy tried to get her to go sightseeing. He was happy at the time, glad to be away from the rest of the world for a while. He was naïve back then, he knows that now. He didn’t question why she insisted on drawing him in every room of the beach house, why she kept them awake until early morning, or why she cried when they slept together on the last day.

She told him she was just tired and he believed her.

She helped him pack for school, putting all the belongings that found a home in her room into boxes. She drove them up to the school in Bender’s truck, helped him set up his dorm room, and kissed him before she left. She even called him when she got home. 

A couple of months in, the phone calls became less and less frequent. Some nights she didn’t even pick up when he called. Bender called him one day concerned because he found one of Allison’s notebooks in the trash.

At that point, she had her associate’s degree in English and she was still working at the record shop. To Andy’s knowledge, she didn’t look for a new job or apply to another school after graduation.

Andy figured she was just in a funk, adjusting to the change of him leaving and her being down with school. He was waiting until she asked him to listen. When Andy was still at home, he tried to get Allison to find another therapist but she insisted that she was fine.

If he had just paid a little more attention, maybe he would have seen it coming. But he didn’t. 

It was a Friday afternoon and Andy had just finished his last class of the day. He walked up the stairs to his dorm and was about to put his key in the lock when he noticed that something was taped to his door. 

He immediately recognized it as the class ring he gave to Allison in the library of Shermer High on prom day.

He doesn’t even remember how he made it back to Shermer, but he knows it was quick. He ran up the stairs to the apartment and used the key he still had to unlock it. He ended up standing in her doorway, looking into her room. Everything was taken off the walls and the bedding was gone. The only thing that remained was a single sketchbook, sitting in the middle of her naked bed. 

Andy doesn’t remember much about what happened next. Somehow, he ended up drunk, sitting on the floor next to her bed. He remained unaware of his surroundings until Bender came home and found him there.

“What happened?” He said, looking around her room and then back down at Andy.

Andy let out a stuttering sigh. “She’s gone.”

~~  
Bender sits on the end of the bed and waits for Claire to finish in the bathroom. When Andy stormed out, she uncontrollably sobbed for fifteen straight minutes. Once she had calmed herself down, she blamed the pregnancy hormones and said that she needed to take a shower. Brian looked clueless about how to help, so Bender sent him home with the rest of the beers Andy brought and led Claire upstairs to the bathroom.

Claire doesn’t allow alcohol to be kept in the apartment. When she first mentioned it, John thought that it was because of him, her holding some fear that he has the potential to become just like his father. He wanted to resent her for that, but he found that he couldn’t. However, he figured out the truth when Claire’s mother stopped by right after Claire had moved in with him. She showed up tipsy and made sure to point out every inadequacy she saw in her daughter before leaving. Then he understood.

So, he sent Brian home with the rest of the beers. Once Claire got to their room, she assured him she could handle herself and made her way to the bathroom. That’s how Bender ended up sitting on his bed and staring at the wall. 

Claire emerges from the bathroom and she’s wearing one of his sleeping shirts. He finds himself staring at her more often now. He’s always found her beautiful, even on the first day that they met, but something about her carrying his child makes him get distracted. 

It’s almost like the period following the first time they had sex. He did his best to make it special and they both enjoyed themselves, but in the weeks following it, they were attached at the hip. He would cringe about his past lovestruck behavior if he wasn’t feeling similar things right now.

She’s standing in front of him wearing only underwear and his t-shirt, so he holds out his hand and says, “Come here.” She takes his hand and sits next to him on the bed. When she rests her head against his shoulder, he nudges her hair with his nose. 

“I shouldn’t have told him,” Claire whispers and Bender squeezes her hand. 

“We couldn’t keep it from him forever.”

“We could have,” Claire argues. “That’s what she wanted us to do.”

“It was never really fair,” Bender says. He doesn’t want to talk about Allison anymore, so he says, “Come on,” and pulls her up to standing. He leads her to her side of the bed and pulls up the sheets, letting her climb inside. He walks over his side of the bed and gets in too. 

He remembers when he first moved into this apartment, back when Claire was still in college and he was just starting his career. In the disorienting time following Allison’s departure, he waited for Claire to do the same thing to him. But she didn’t, and he asked her to move in with him, and he decided to stop waiting for things to end. Now, they’re engaged with a baby on the way. 

Bender watches as Claire pulls the blankets up to her chin. He remembers another scene similar to this, back when they were first living together and Bender was beginning to accept that his life was always going to be like this.

“Claire,” he said back then, brushing her red curls off her forehead. “I don’t want to hate my life.”

The Claire from the beginning of their relationship would have taken that statement as a threat, but she knew him inside and out by then. She reached up and grabbed his wrist, rubbing her thumb along the vein on the inside. The Bender of the past would have scoffed at her for being so openly soft, but he found that he appreciated it in that moment.

“I’m going to make sure that you don’t,” Claire says, “for as long as you want me to.”

Now, he takes her hand and looks at the ring that he retrieved from Andy’s apartment the day after he proposed. He can’t believe he’s getting married to a girl he dated in high school, a girl who used to be the most popular girl in their grade. Now that they’ve grown up, he realizes that it doesn’t really matter and that her pristine image was just a cover to appease her parents.

“I hope Andy’s okay,” Claire whispers. 

Bender doesn’t envy Andy and the way his relationship with Allison fell apart. Unlike Bender, who was often waiting for his own relationship to collapse in some dramatic way, Andy thought that him and Allison would be together forever. 

“I do too,” Bender says before kissing her gently and turning off the light.

~~  
A few days later, Brian is back in Claire and Bender’s apartment, this time blowing up balloons. Bender enlisted his help to throw Claire a baby/bridal combination party a couple of weeks ago and the day is finally here. Claire’s mother has had no interest in helping with her daughter’s pregnancy, likely at the insistence of her husband. Bender recounted the day Claire told her parents she was expecting and according to him, her father’s reaction was not pretty. 

Her parents are invited, Bender made sure of it. Brian was the one who made that phone call. Her mother may have judged him initially, but he’s worn her down over the years into liking him. Brian also figured that Claire’s parents would rather get the invitation from him than Bender. Claire’s brother Patrick and his partner Jimmy, simply because Claire’s parents were going to be there, had opted out of attending the party but were coming later for dinner.

Claire is at work and Bender is out getting the food, so Brian was left alone to decorate. Bender wants the party to be perfect for Claire, so he’s made sure to keep it a surprise. The invite list is conservative, but Claire’s closest friends are on it. Well, most of them.

Brian is about to start hanging up a banner when there’s a knock at the door. He rushes to answer it and finds Andy and his girlfriend Christina standing there. 

“Hey, guys,” Brian says, stepping aside to let them in.

They greet him as he leads them to the living room, where he’s set up a chair. “Need me to spot you?” 

“Sure,” Brian says, climbing up on the chair. 

While Andy stands behind him, Christina sits on the couch. Brian tapes the edges of the banner to the door frame, pressing down on the tape so it sticks. Once it’s firmly in place, Andy steps back and Brian jumps down from the chair. 

“It looks nice in here, Brian,” Christina says from her spot on the couch. Brian didn’t notice when they walked in, but Christina is holding a gift bag. 

“Thanks,” he says. “You can put your gift over there.”

Andy takes the bag from her and walks it over to the table Brian and Bender set up. For some reason, Bender was very against inviting Christina to the party. It was never explicitly acknowledged, but Brian knew and so did Andy. After Andy left the house upset a few nights ago, Brian called and told him to bring her. 

It’s a little awkward, Brian can feel it, but Andy is pretending like nothing happened and Brian decides to do the same. Before Brian has to try to come up with any awkward conversation starters, Bender pushes his way into the apartment with arms full of grocery bags. Brian rushes to meet him and takes a couple of bags from him hands.

“Looks good in here, Bri,” Bender says, walking over to the kitchen and dropping the bags on the table. Brian follows his lead and then reaches into the bags, pulling items out.

“Hey, Bender,” Andy says, and when Brian looks over, he sees Andy standing under the banner, holding his girlfriend’s hand. 

Brian watches as Bender’s face falls microscopically at the sight of Andy’s girlfriend, but he says, “Hey guys,” before he looks back at Brian. Brian only caught it because he knows Bender so well, but Andy knows him pretty well too. It’s unlikely that he missed it.

“Uh,” Brian says, “we should hurry. We want to be all set up before Claire gets back.”

Bender nods and pulls the items out of the bags. If Brian can get him alone, he’ll ask what’s bothering him.

~~  
Laurie pulls up in front of the mall where Claire works and puts her car in park. Laurie was recruited by Bender to pick up his fiancée and drive her to her surprise party. According to him, Claire threw up on herself while driving and almost got in a wreck, so he insisted that he drive her to and from work until she has the baby. 

Laurie hopes that Claire doesn’t ask her too many questions on the ride back because she’s a terrible liar. She doesn’t want to spoil the surprise, but Claire can be insistent. She hasn’t seen Claire in a bit, not since right after she got back from her business trip a few days ago. 

Laurie’s life has been a bit of a whirlwind since then. The company she was working at promoted her and then transferred her to another branch closer to Shermer. She’s set to start at her new job after the weekend as a computer tech consultant, but she’s nervous. Her first job wasn’t in what she went to school for, but this one is.

She’s so lost in her own thoughts that she almost misses Claire walking out the doors. Laurie quickly beeps her horn and when Claire looks over in her direction, Laurie waves her over. Soon enough, Claire is slipping into the passenger seat of Laurie’s car. 

“What are you doing here?” Claire says, leaning over as far as her pregnant belly will allow and hugging her.

“I’m in town for the weekend,” she says, choosing her words carefully. “I called your apartment and Bender told me you were at work. I volunteered to pick you up.”

Luckily for her, Claire doesn’t question it. She just smiles and says, “It’s good to see you.”

Laurie, happy that she doesn’t have to lie, puts her car in drive. 

“So, have you started the new job yet?” Claire asks.

“I start Monday,” Laurie says. “How’s work for you?”

“Pretty good,” Claire says. “Working and going to school at the same time is a lot harder than I thought it would be, especially with the baby on the way.”

“How are you feeling? You look great,” Laurie says.

Laurie sees Claire smile softly out of the corner of her eye. “Thanks,” she says. “I’m still nauseous most of the time. Whoever named it ‘morning sickness’ misled me.”

Laurie laughs and can’t help but feel happy for her oldest friend. Laurie thought for sure that she was going to marry her last boyfriend, but he dumped her unexpectedly and moved out of their apartment in the city. Laurie has a sneaking suspicion that the reason he left her was because he found out she was making more money than he was.

As they drive along the road, Laurie can’t help but wonder if Brian will be at the party. She doesn’t see why he wouldn’t be, but the thought of seeing him again makes her stomach fill with butterflies. It’s been a long time, almost 5 years, since she’s actually seen him. Her huge crush that appeared almost out of nowhere her senior year of high school was never acted on, but she wonders if things could be different now.

Though, she acknowledges that she’s a much different person now. He must be as well. Still, she wonders and the butterflies flutter in her stomach. 

~~  
Brian is in the bathroom when he hears the loud shouts of surprise. He’s only in there to escape the scrutiny of Claire’s parents and an awkward conversation with Andy and Christina. A few of Claire’s work friends and some cousins were also there, chatting in groups around the edges of the living room.

He swears under his breath and flushes before washing his hands under warm water. He didn’t think Claire would be there so soon and he couldn’t stand the unexplainable tension for another second. 

Brian pushes open the door and walks out into the chaos. It’s more settled than he thought, Claire sitting on the couch next to her parents and friends, while Bender leans against the door frame. Brian joins him, standing next to him and watching the scene in front of them.

“Was she surprised?” Brian asks.

“She cried,” Bender says, nodding his head over to where Claire is drying her eyes with a tissue. 

“That’s a good thing, right?” Brian asks. Claire cries a lot now because of the pregnancy hormones, but she’s smiling which is indicative of a good thing.

“Yeah,” Bender says, and then his eye bug out for a second.

“John, will you help us in the kitchen for a moment?” Claire’s mother says, her father standing next to her. 

“Um, sure,” Bender says, shooting Brian a quick look before leading her parents back into the kitchen. 

Brian watches them go and then turns his attention back to the party. Claire motions for him to come over and he does, stepping over people’s feet.

“This is so sweet,” Claire says. “Thank you for this.” She reaches over and kisses his forehead lightly, careful not to get her lipgloss on his skin. 

“You deserve it,” Brian says, sending her a soft smile. 

Claire looks up and smiles, and Brian follows her gaze. He sees a woman about their age across the room and Brian realizes that it’s Laurie. His first proper crush, the first one guided by both head and heart anyway, is walking towards him like they’re in the halls of Shermer High again.

As he watches her now, he realizes that she looks a lot like his ex-girlfriend from college. He dated Sarah briefly before Greg, but their relationship didn’t last long. Laurie seems to notice him for the first time, her eyes squinting as if she recognizes him but can’t place him. He doesn’t blame her, he’s been told that he looks a lot different now than he did in high school.

“Come sit,” Claire says to Laurie, patting the cushion on the other side of her. She obeys and doesn’t take her eyes off of him.

“Wait a minute,” Laurie says. “Brian?” Brian nods and she lets out a laugh. “Oh my God, you look so different.”

Brian doesn’t know if that’s a compliment or not, but he smiles all the same. “Laurie,” he says. “Nice to see you again. You look good.”

Claire raises her eyebrows at him before looking at Laurie. Brian honestly has no idea what’s happening right now and he feels himself flush. Laurie is still watching him when Bender comes back in the room. 

He walks over to Claire and holds out his hand. As he helps her up, Brian hears Bender whisper “Regardless of whatever is about to happen, trust me when I say I tried to talk them out of it.”

“Oh no,” Claire whispers back and Bender slips his hand around her waist. 

He leads her over to the kitchen and once they’re gone, Laurie shifts over until he can feel the warmth of her leg next to his. “So,” she says, “how have you been?”

Before he can answer, there’s the sound of tapping on glass from the other side of the room. They both break eye contact and look up to find Claire’s mother standing in the doorframe next to her husband, Bender and Claire standing behind them. Brian can tell by the way they’re standing that Bender is rubbing her back. He does that sometimes, especially lately, when she gets anxious.

“Everyone,” Ellen Standish says. “It’s time for games.”

~~  
Claire _hates_ party games, particularly when the party has people she doesn’t know very well. Sure, she’s friends with everyone here, but she’s not close with all of them. Some of them are work friends, people she’s friendly with but not close to. 

John knows that she hates party games. He tried his best, but he is perpetually on her parents’ bad side and didn’t want to get in a blow-out fight with them (again). She knows he’s trying for her and she knows that he doesn’t understand her desire to maintain a relationship with them, but she appreciates his efforts.

She wishes that he tried just a little bit harder this time, though. 

After trying to change the diaper of a baby doll blindfolded and being subjected to people guessing about the firsts of her relationship with Bender (minus sex, because some lines her mother won’t cross), Claire is tired of people looking at her. 

Claire escapes to the kitchen when Andy and Bender bring out the cake. She’s overwhelmed by the sheer amount of people in her apartment and she’s so nauseous she feels like she might throw up. 

She isn’t alone for long. After the cake is sliced and passed out, her fiancé comes up behind her and slips an arm around her waist. “Hi,” he says, pressing a kiss to the top of her head.

“Hello,” she says back and curls closer to him. “This is fun.”

Bender snorts. “Are you sure? Your mother seems to have taken over.”

“Yes,” Claire says. “She tends to do that. But thank you for the surprise. It’s very sweet.”

“Well, that’s just who I am, Sweets,” Bender says. “I’m just that considerate.”

“You really are, even if it doesn’t fit with your tough guy image.”

“You think I still have a tough guy image? _That’s_ sweet,” he says, dragging his thumb up and down her side. 

Claire knows he’s right, John Bender having fully embraced settling down and getting married. Still, she sees the Bender she met in detention in the man standing next to her. It’s kind of funny, how he’s so different yet so the same.

She leans up and kisses him, pressing her hand to his face. It’s shallow but long, so long that her ears buzz and she hears Andy say something, but she doesn’t make out exactly what he says. 

She also hears the door open and doesn’t react, but Bender does. “Oh fuck,” he says, pulling away and twisting around. 

“What is it?” She says, looking over at the entryway. From the angle where they’re standing, she can’t see the front door.

“Stay here,” he says, and he pulls away from her. 

She frowns as she watches him go, but stays put.

~~  
Andy is standing near the wall, Christina leaning against his side. Christina is talking about some work assignment she has to do over the weekend and Andy is only half-listening. They both work a lot, so it’s not unusual that one of them has to spend half the weekend in the office. Andy has reading to do for class anyway, so he won’t miss her too much. 

Just as he finishes his slice of cake and sets his plate down on the coffee table, he hears a knock at the door. No one else seems to hear it and he doesn’t see Bender or Claire, so he looks at Christina and nods his head towards the entryway.

“Wanna play host with me?” He asks and she nods. 

When he walks into the kitchen, he sees Bender and Claire kissing. He rolls his eyes at the display and says, “I’m getting the door.” They don’t react to his words, so he just rolls his eyes again and walks up to the door. 

He twists the doorknob and pulls the door open, and when he sees who it is, he feels his heart sink to the bottom of his stomach. 

Allison Reynolds is standing in front of him, under the porch light, and is staring at him like she used to. 

She looks different, older. She is older, he realizes, but in his mind she hasn’t aged. In his mind, she looks the same as she did the day she helped move him into his dorm. He’s having trouble reconciling that Allison with the one standing in front of him.

She’s standing there in front of him like she never left. Never left him. 

“Hi,” she says,” as if she doesn’t realize she’s ripping his hear from his chest. 

“What are you doing here?” Andrew asks, fists clenched at his sides.

Allison tilts her head and glances quickly over at Christina. “Claire is having a baby. Didn’t you know?”

Andy lets out a dry laugh. “Did I know? Of course I know. I’ve been here.”

Andy almost wants her to react, to show some emotion, but she doesn’t. She just nods and genuinely acknowledges Christina for the first time. “Hello,” she says. “You must be Christina.”

Andy is so lost in his head that he doesn’t hear what his girlfriend says in response. His head is filled with white noise, voices not breaking through until Bender materializes from somewhere Andy doesn’t notice. He must have pushed past Andy to be where he’s standing, but Andy doesn’t remember him doing it.

“Hey, nutcase,” Bender says, going in for a hug. 

Christina grabs Andy’s hand while he watches them embrace. “Are you okay?” She whispers to him. He shakes his head minutely and turns around. He doesn’t know if she follows him or not, but he knows that he can’t stand there another second.

~~  
Claire cries when she sees Allison, which is good, but Andy slouches in the corner of the room and refuses to make eye contact with anyone, which is bad. Bender assumed that he would react this way and he contemplated telling him beforehand, but he knew that Andy wouldn’t have come if he did. An optimistic part of him was hoping that maybe he could get them to talk after all this time. 

Maybe it was a shitty thing for him to do, but Allison is Claire’s best friend and she hasn’t seen her in too long. 

Brian wasn’t even aware that she was coming, which is probably why he didn’t think twice about inviting Christina. Bender would have insisted that he not, but it honestly slipped his mind. 

Most of Claire’s casual friends and her parents were heading out, leaving only Christina, Andy, Brian, Allison, and Laurie. Bender checks the clock on the wall; Patrick and Jimmy are likely close.

Claire moves to the couch, dragging Allison by her arm to sit next to her. Bender realizes then that Allison is carrying a gift bag. Once they’re sitting, Allison passes the bag to Claire. While Claire is opening the gift, Brian sits next to Allison and gives her a quick hug. 

It really has been too long since they’ve all been together. 

Bender is leaning against the doorframe and watching the scene when Andy approaches him. Christina is right behind him and although Bender doesn’t know her very well, he thinks she looks a little lost. 

“I know we said we were going to stay for dinner, but we’re actually going to take off,” Andy says. “Say goodbye to Claire for me.”

Bender nods slowly. “Alright,” he says, and Andy is looking at the wall behind Bender’s ear but doesn’t meet his eyes. “I’m sorry, Andy.”

Andy shakes his head and looks back at his girlfriend. “Don’t be. We’re just going to go home.”

Bender offers them both a smile as they walk by him. When he returns his gaze to the dwindling party, he locks eyes with Allison. Claire is turning over the gift that Allison gave her, a couple of children’s books, but Allison is looking at where Andy was just standing.

If Bender is being honest, he’s surprised that him and Claire were the couple that ended up staying together and that Andy and Allison were the ones to fall apart. It’s ridiculously obvious to everyone outside of the situation that they need to talk, but he doubts it’ll happen, especially now. 

“Do you like it?” Allison asks, finally looking back at Claire.

“I do,” Claire says. “I’ve seen advertisements for these books at the mall. Everyone’s reading them, even adults. Apparently they’re a big deal.”

“I don’t know about that, but they are signed.”

“Really? How did you manage that?” Claire asks. 

Allison shrugs as Claire flips to the first page. Bender can see the scribbled signature from where he’s standing. “Well, I’m the one who wrote them.”

Bender heard that she was writing, but he had no idea that she was a published author, a really successful one at that. She used a pseudonym, hiding herself in plain sight.

“That’s incredible,” Claire says, setting the books down on her lap and leaning over to give her a hug. “I love it. Thank you.”

Brian reaches over and snatches the book off of Claire’s lap, reading the synopsis on the back. He’s so engrossed in it that he doesn’t even notice when Allison lays a hand on his arm. 

Laurie, the last person there who wasn’t in detention that day, looks down at her watch and stands. “Claire, I’ve got to head out.”

Claire stands and gives her a tight hug. Bender doesn’t fully understand Claire’s friendship with Laurie, but he can admit that she’s changed a lot since their high school days. She calls pretty often and she takes Claire out to dinner whenever she’s in town. He _almost_ considers her one of his own casual friends, but he would never tell her that. 

Laurie shoots him a smile as she walks by him to get her coat. When Bender looks back at the room, he sees Brian, finally looking up from the book, tracking her movements from across the room. Bender has no idea what _that’s_ about, but Brian catches him looking and looks away before Bender can figure out what’s going on. 

Once Laurie is gone, Bender walks over to the couch. Claire makes room for him on her other side and he sinks into the cushion next to her. As he wraps his arm around Claire and holds her close, he looks around the room. With Allison here, it feels like the good old days. 

He knows Andy had his reasons for taking off, but Bender wishes he was still here. 

~~  
Christina sits on her side of the bed, watching Andy pace back and forth. She knows what’s coming next, even if he doesn’t yet. 

He never really spoke much about Allison before, only sometimes mentioning an ex who really messed him up. Seeing him today made her realize that he’s still in love with her.

As much as she wants to resent him for that, she can’t. He doesn’t even realize it himself yet. She knows he loves her too, but it’s not the same. 

They’ve been dating for almost a year and Christina spends most nights at his apartment, but she can’t help but think that they’re not as close as a couple should be. She’s met his parents and although his father likes her, she can tell that his mother doesn’t. She’s never said anything, but Christina can tell.

Andy has met her parents and her sister and they like him well enough, but even her sister asked if she thought there was something missing. 

She’s happy with him, but she agrees with her sister. She now realizes that the something missing for Andy is the fact that she isn’t his high school sweetheart.

“Andy, can you please sit down?” She says, patting the bed next to her. 

It’s like he doesn’t hear her. He doesn’t sit and continues pacing back and forth in front of her. She’s never seen him like this before, never seen him so emotional about anything. 

She knows this is going to hurt. But, Christina knows she deserves better than to be her boyfriend’s second choice, whether he realizes that’s what he’s made her or not. 

“Andy,” she says, and her tone makes him pause.

“Sorry,” he says, shaking his head. “I’m sorry. I’ll sit.”

He does and he leans back on his arms. “Are you alright?” She asks, even though she already knows the answer. 

“I wasn’t expecting her to be there,” he says, and Christina shakes her head, slightly enough so he doesn’t see.

“I can tell,” Christina says. 

“I don’t know why I’m so upset about it,” Andy says. 

Christina reaches her hand over and grabs his. “Andy,” she says softly.

“I’m just a little rattled,” Andy says, his hand loose in hers. He goes quiet and looks ahead at the wall.

Christina is a realist, she always has been. She’s always thought that it’s better to see things how they really are rather than getting too excited. She knows where this is going. Andy’s been a great boyfriend, but she’s known deep down that something is missing. At first, she assumed that it was because they were working so much and Andy is still in school. Their lives are busy and that’s just how it was, but now that Christina is thinking about it, she can’t remember the last time they spent any time together out of bed.

“Andy,” she says again, pulling her hand away from him. He looks at her then, shaking his head.

“No,” he says, “don’t do this.”

“Listen to me,” she says. “Please, Andy.”

“So you’re leaving me,” Andy says. He seems resigned to it, almost as much as she is.

“This isn’t just about Allison,” she says and he flinches minutely when she says his ex’s name. “You know it’s been off between us.”

“I don’t know,” Andy says. “I guess.” He drops his head into his hands. 

“I just don’t want to hold us back,” she continues, talking because she feels the need to explain, but not because this situation really needs an explanation. She knows that he feels the same.

“I get it,” he says. “I just wish it didn’t have to be this way.”

Christina lets out a breath. She almost thinks that this is too easy, too clean a break after a year together. She prefers it to a screaming match though. “Take some time to figure yourself out, Andy. It’s best for both of us.”

Andy lifts his head up and looks at her. “This really sucks, doesn’t it,” he says.

“It does,” Christina says. She lays her hand on top of his and squeezes. “We’ll be alright.”

“I love you,” he says, and she knows he means it, but it doesn’t make a difference anymore. Christina knows what she’s about and she knows that it’ll be best for both of them. 

“I know,” she says. “I love you too.”

Then she stands. 

~~  
Brian hasn’t felt this jittery since his first day of college. First days are nerve-wracking in general and Brian is starting at a company that’s been all over the news for their strides in the computer industry. A part of him, that annoying voice in the back of his head, has made him feel as though he doesn’t deserve it and that someone is going to find out sooner or later that he’s a fraud.

For now, he pushes it out of his mind as he walks away from his car in the parking garage. He follows the directions he was mailed and ends up on the 25th floor of a city skyscraper. When the elevator doors open, he is instantly overwhelmed by the bustling work floor he steps into. 

It is the most technologically advanced place he’s ever stepped foot in, and the imposter syndrome rears its ugly head again. 

He’s standing awkwardly by reception when the woman he interviewed with, Karen he thinks, walks up to him. “Hello, Brian” She says and she offers him her hand. Brian shakes it and she turns, saying over her shoulder, “Follow me.”

Brian obeys, following her to the back of the office space. “We are waiting on a few more people, so take a seat and we’ll start orientation when they get here,” Karen says, opening the door to a conference room and motioning for him to enter. 

“Thank you,” Brian says, sending her a smile as she walks away. He reaches behind him to close the door.

“Well, isn’t this a coincidence,” a voice says, and Brian whips around faster than he probably should have.

“Laurie?” 

She’s sitting in a swivel chair at the end of a long conference table and she’s alone. Brian clutches his messenger bag and makes his way over, sitting in the chair across from her.

“You’re starting here too?” Brian asks, as if it isn’t obvious. 

“Same as you, it seems,” she says and she smiles at him. 

“I didn’t know you worked in computers,” Brian says and she shrugs.

“I found that I liked it in college. I’m not surprised you do,” she says. “I _am_ surprised to see you here.”

“We do keep bumping into each other,” Brian says, although he doesn’t know if reacquainting at a mutual friend’s bridal/baby showing qualifies as bumping into someone.

“How’s Claire?” Laurie asks, and Brian can tell that she’s just making conversation because she just saw Claire a couple days ago. 

“Good,” he says. 

Before she can say anything else, Karen walks back into the room with two people following her. The two men sit down at the table, one with a suit a size too big and the other wearing a hideous shade of green. Karen stands at the head of the table and clasps her hands together. “Alright, let’s get started.”

~~  
The wedding creeps up on him and the morning he wakes up alone, he feels a wall of anxiety hit him. This is the first night in the last year that Claire hasn’t slept beside him and he had a hard time sleeping between the lack of warmth and the anxiety. 

Claire insisted that she couldn’t see him on the day of their wedding because it was “bad luck”. Bender laughed when she said it because she’s pregnant and is planning on wearing a white dress, propriety seems completely lost at this point, but she refused to budge on the issue. She’s staying at Brian’s new apartment with her brother Patrick and his partner Jimmy. Bender has no idea how the four of them are sleeping in that small apartment, but she’s the one who wanted to do it.

He gets up earlier than he was planning on, but he finds that he can’t stay in bed any longer. He runs through the shower and slips into the tuxedo that Claire left hanging on the back of their bathroom door. 

When he looks in the mirror, he doesn’t even recognize himself. He looks like a fancier, older version of himself, one who has his life together. He realizes, standing there, that he actually does.

~~  
Claire is more nervous than she’s ever been in her entire life and she’s about ready to murder her mother in cold blood. 

In the early afternoon, Brian drove her to the venue. Patrick and Jimmy were also in the car, but went to breakfast with Brian after they dropped her off. The sole reason they didn’t come in with her is because her mother is helping her get ready and Patrick didn’t want to cause a scene at Claire’s wedding. Claire knows better, knowing that there will be a scene no matter what, but she honors her brother’s wishes. 

Allison is there as well, helping her get dressed. Her mother is sitting on the other side of the room, talking about nothing and driving her up the wall. As Allison zips up Claire’s dress, Claire’s mother says, “Claire honey, it really is a shame that you’re pregnant. That dress would have looked so wonderful on you.” _If you were skinnier_ , are the words that remain unsaid.

Claire stiffly inhales and Allison lays a supportive hand on her shoulder. Claire whips around as soon as Allison is done and narrows her gaze. “Mother, if you don’t have anything nice, maybe don’t say anything at all.”

“Well, it’s true,” her mother says. “But I’m sorry, dear.”

Claire feels herself turn red. “Mom, please don’t.”

“Please don’t, what?”

“Please don’t do what you usually do,” Claire says. She’s grown more of a backbone when dealing with her parents. They still hate John, even now, and they have often made this fact known. Since she’s reconnected with her brother and gotten to know her brother’s partner, the rejection of her parents has taken a much more cynical meaning. 

“And what do I usually do?” Her mother asks, crossing her arms.

Claire takes a deep breath. “I know that you don’t like John, but this is our wedding. You can’t be rude to him.”

“I’m perfectly civil to your boyfriend,” her mom says, “and so is your father. We’re doing you a courtesy, we don’t have to be.”

Claire shoots a look at Allison. There’s so much wrong with that sentence, starting with the fact that her mom called John her boyfriend, and ending with the courtesy comment.

“Mother,” Claire warns. “You cannot be rude to our guests.”

“I am not _rude_ ,” her mother snaps back and Claire takes a deep breath. 

“Mother, I invited Patrick,” Claire says. She wanted to prepare her mother, maybe ease into it a little more, but the words came tumbling out. 

“What?” Her mother says, sitting up a little straighter.

“And his boyfriend, Jimmy,” Claire adds, lifting her chin.

“ _What?_ ” Her mother exclaims, standing up in shock. “How on _Earth_ -“

“I want them here, so they will be here. You are _not_ going to say anything about it.”

Claire’s mother sputters like a fish out of water, but Claire just turns around to face Allison. “I think it’s time to finish my make up. What do you say?”

Allison just smiles softly before nodding. Claire reaches up and wipes her brow. It’s going to be a long day.

~~  
Patrick hasn’t been to Al’s Diner since high school and it feels weird to be back. Shermer isn’t known for it’s culinary excellence so Brian brought them to the best place he could think of for lunch. He orders a turkey sandwich while Jimmy and Brian order chicken. 

He hasn’t stopped shaking since they drove into Shermer last night.

Jimmy can always sense when he’s uneasy and now is no exception. He lays a soft hand on his thigh, out of view of everyone in the restaurant.

“So, how have you been, Brian?” Jimmy asks. 

Patrick and Jimmy have an odd relationship with Claire’s best friend. She practically forced Brian to talk to him because she found out he was seeing a boy in college. Even though Patrick is gay, the only thing Claire actually knows about the community is that gay men have been dying of an illness that cannot be cured. She begged Patrick to talk to him about how to stay safe, so he did. 

“I’ve been alright,” Brian says. “Greg and I broke up.”

Patrick and Jimmy already knew this of course, because Claire keeps them updated on all of the Shermer news, but Jimmy just nods. “I’m sorry to hear that.”

“It’s for the best, really,” Brian says. “How are you?”

“We’re good,” Jimmy says as he looks over at Patrick. “Mostly just working and getting ready for the move.”

Patrick was offered a job in Boston and jumped on the chance immediately. The job had better benefits and the city was much more tolerant than the one he was currently living in. The only con was moving away from his sister, but he knows she’ll be alright. She got by without him in her life for a long time, she can do it again.

“Can you believe the wedding is actually here?” Brian asks.

“Yes and no,” Patrick says, finally contributing to the conversation. “I feel like Claire has been planning this forever.”

When they were younger, Claire used to force Patrick to play wedding. Claire would dress up in a pink princess dress and Patrick was forced to officiate her marriage to her favorite stuffed animal. While Patrick is sure her younger self didn’t picture being pregnant and marrying a man that her parents loathe, he thinks that she’ll still enjoy her day just the same.

“Oh, she has,” Brian says, and Patrick can tell that he’s thinking of his own Claire-related wedding story. “Her parents aren’t happy, though.”

“Mom and dad were always against fornication and homosexuality. Now they’re two for two,” Patrick says. “I just hope they don’t cause a scene.”

“They wouldn’t,” Brian says. “Not if it’ll make them look bad.”

“True enough,” Patrick says and he looks over at Jimmy. 

Jimmy is at a disadvantage in this conversation, because he has never had the honor of meeting Patrick and Claire’s parents. Patrick met Jimmy in college, they sat next to each other in freshman English, and Patrick fell in love fast and hard, although it started slow. Jimmy asked him for help on his essays and since Patrick was doing pretty well in the class, he didn’t think anything of it. At least he didn’t think anything of it until Jimmy, brave as he always is, leaned over and kissed him during a study session in his dorm room. Patrick flailed, and Jimmy waited, and then Patrick kissed him back. 

By the time they graduated, Patrick couldn’t imagine his life without Jimmy in it. 

He knew that he would lose his family by choosing him, but there really wasn’t any choice at all. He missed Claire and mourned her loss, but he lost his parents long before the day they left him standing alone in his new house. 

Even though Jimmy doesn’t know Patrick’s parents, he knows all about their treatment of him. Jimmy also knows that Patrick hasn’t stopped shaking since they crossed into Illinois. 

“It’ll be okay,” Jimmy says, squeezing his leg again. 

And even though Patrick’s stomach is in knots, he nods.

~~  
Andy prepares himself as he ties his tie in front of his bathroom mirror. The room looks empty now without all of Christina’s things and Andy isn’t quite used to it yet.

As he pulls the knot tight, his mind wanders to Allison, like it often has over the past few years. He tried to stop it, but she’s always been good at stealing his focus. He’s frustrated beyond belief that she showed up out of nowhere and fucked his life up again, but he figures it’s probably about time that he comes to terms with the whole situation.

He’s beyond angry and confused, but really underneath it all, he just wants to know why. 

~~  
Allison breaths a sigh of relief when she sees Brian appear in the doorway. The tension between Claire and her mother had boiled over and now Claire is pretending like she isn’t affected by it while her mother is giving her the cold shoulder. 

“How’s it going?” Brian whispers as Allison approaches.

“Oh, you know,” Allison says, “as pleasant as always. Where’d you leave them?” 

Brian shrugs. “They wanted to go walk around downtown. I let Patrick drive my car and they dropped me off here.”

“I think Mrs. Standish is in shock,” Allison says softly, looking discreetly over her shoulder. When she turns back around, Brian is looking at her. “What?”

“Nothing,” he says. “It’s just weird to see you here.”

“Bad weird?”

“No,” he says. “Obviously not.”

Allison smiles and bumps her shoulder against his. “C’mon, let’s get you ready.”

~~  
Soon enough, Claire’s family starts to arrive, as well as her college friends and Bender’s friends from work. Andy peaks out from behind a divider and sees the hall decorated and people filling into the seats. He doesn’t see Patrick and Jimmy yet, which is probably smart. It will probably be better for them if they sneak in right before the ceremony. 

Bender and Brian are downstairs, along with Bender’s friend Joey from high school and his friend Will from his garage. Brian’s the best man on a technicality; Bender made them flip a coin because he refused to pick on his own.

He assumes that Claire’s bridesmaids are here too. Claire picked Laurie as her maid of honor before Allison showed back up. Her two friends from college, whose names are escaping him, must be there too. 

Andy can’t believe that this day is here. Sometimes he doesn’t feel that much older than the boy who sat in detention that Saturday. Way too young to have two friends getting married. 

He sighs and turns around, making his way back down to where everyone is getting ready. 

~~  
John feels a little out of his body right now and he doesn’t actually recall how he ended up standing at the front of the hall. He very skillfully avoided eye contact with Claire’s parents as he made his way up there. The bridesmaids and groomsmen have already processed and are lined up. Brian is facing him and sends him a reassuring smile. 

When the song changes and he hears everyone stand, he turns around. When he sees Claire, he smiles.

~~  
Claire has dreamed about her wedding since she was a little girl, but no one told her how quickly the ceremony would fly by. The next thing she knows, she’s kissing John and then holding his hand as they walk back down the aisle. 

There’s a car waiting for them outside to take them to the reception hall and they climb inside. Claire waves out the window at her friends and family as the driver drives away.

She looks over at Bender, her _husband_ , to find that he’s already looking at her. She smiles softly at him and he reaches into his front pocket, producing a white envelope. 

“Here,” he says, passing the paper to her. She takes it and sees her name in his handwriting.

“What is this?” She asks.

“Just read it,” he says, and then he looks out the window. 

Claire rips open the envelope with her finger and pulls out the piece of paper inside. When she unfolds it and reads the first line, she realizes what he’s given her and immediately starts to tear up.

Claire decided that they would do generic vows, knowing that Bender would never want to write his own. John agreed, but it turns out it wasn’t that he didn’t want to write his own, he just didn’t want anyone else to hear them.

Claire reaches over, grabs his hand, and reads. 

~~  
It turns out that being married doesn’t feel too different from being engaged, just like being engaged didn’t feel too different from dating. The sit-down dinner and dessert were pretty enjoyable, except for the awkward, palpable tension between Andy and Allison. Claire strategically placed Brian in between them, but even he looks exhausted by it. 

Christina didn’t show up and Bender didn’t ask any questions, but Claire thinks that they broke up. Whether or not that’s true, Andy came alone.

After the dinner, people made their way to the dance floor while Claire and Bender did their obligatory rounds to greet their guests. Claire has been misty-eyed most of the night and right now is not an exception. Bender stands next to her while she talks to her brother and Jimmy. 

“You’re all grown up, Claire-bear,” Patrick says and Claire pulls him into a hug.

“Congratulations,” Jimmy says and he offers Bender his hand. Bender shakes his hand and offers him a smile. Bender has always liked Jimmy and Patrick, and he owes them for the time they healed him and offered him kindness during a time when almost no one did.

When Claire pulls back from her brother’s embrace, Bender sees two unlikely and unwelcome figures appear. Claire sees his face and follows his gaze, finding her parents approaching. Claire reaches for Bender’s hand while Patrick’s face flushes a dark red.

“Mother, Father,” Patrick says, and John holds his breath. Claire squeezes his hand tight and watches the unfolding scene in horror.

“Patrick,” Claire’s mother says, her voice hushed. John has known Ellen Standish for a long time and he’s never heard her use that tone before.

Claire’s father regards his son with a cold gaze John thought was only reserved for him. It makes him angry, because while John has done things that warrant Peter Standish’s hatred, Patrick did nothing but fall in love with a man.

“This is Jimmy,” Patrick says bravely, placing his hand on the small of Jimmy’s back.

“Why are you here?” Claire’s father says, refusing to acknowledge Jimmy.

“Because I want them to be here,” Claire says, fixing her glare on her parents. “And so does John. This is our day.”

Claire’s father just turns around and walks away, but Claire’s mother stays. “Pat…” she says, looking at his face and then at Jimmy’s. To Bender’s absolute surprise, she reaches out and touches Patrick’s shoulder. She keeps it there for the briefest of seconds before withdrawing, turning around, and following the steps of her husband.

Claire and Bender watch her leave before turning to look at Patrick. Bender looks on as Jimmy watches Patrick’s face. “Well,” Patrick says, letting out a deep sigh. “I don’t know about anyone else, but I could use a drink.”

“Absolutely,” Jimmy says, reaching for Patrick’s hand. “We’ll catch up with you later. Go have fun.”

As they walk away, Claire looks up at him and shakes her head. “That was… not what I was expecting.”

“No,” Bender says before squeezing her hand again. “Wanna dance?”

Claire smiles up at him. “Sure, but I know you don’t.”

“I’m willing to make that sacrifice,” Bender says. “But only for today.”

Claire steps out in front of him and drags his arm behind her. “Let’s go then.”

~~  
“Wanna dance?” 

Brian looks up from where he’s been picking at his fingers to find Laurie standing in front of him. “Uh…”

“C’mon, it’ll be fun,” she says, smiling. Brian thinks she looks pretty. Then again, he always thinks she looks pretty. 

He’s seen a lot of her lately ever since they both started working at the same company. They don’t work near each other in the office, but they always seem to take a lunch break at the same time. If he’s being honest, he feels like he’s been going a little bit crazy.

“I’m not much of a dancer,” he says, leaning back further into the wall. 

“Even Bender is dancing,” Laurie argues, nodding her head towards the dance floor. Brian looks over and finds that Bender actually is dancing, but he’s sure it’s because Claire forced him to.

Brian has a feeling that Laurie won’t take no as an answer, so he just pushes himself off of the wall. “Fine, but you owe me one.”

Laurie smiles and holds out her hand. “Deal.”

~~  
“We need to talk.” 

It took Andy most of the evening to gain the courage to approach Allison. She sat close to him at dinner, only Brian sitting between them, but he didn’t want to say anything in front of their friends. He didn’t want to create a scene and ruin Claire and Bender’s wedding. 

But everyone is out on the dance floor and Allison is alone, and Andy knows that it’s time.

“Now?” Allison says, but she pushes away from the wall she was leaning on. 

“I think it’s about time, don’t you?” He says, then he turns and walks out the doors of the hall without looking back.

It’s a nice night outside, warmer than expected, and Andy feels a cool breeze blow through his hair. He walks down the steps and into the parking lot. When he turns around, he sees Allison a few steps behind him. She stops a few feet in front of him, the wind blowing through her hair and dress.

“You know, I hate what you did to me. I hate that you had to do it,” Andy says, clenching his jaw.

Allison wraps her arms around her torso. “I know.”

“I still love you,” he says, the words tumbling out of his mouth before he is able to stop them. “I hate myself for it.”

Allison opens her mouth, then closes it without saying anything. She’s staring at him and it makes him feel small. “It’s been two and a half years,” she finally says. “You have a new girlfriend.”

“I _had_ a girlfriend,” he hisses through clenched teeth. “We broke up. It’s not fair for me to drag her along when I don’t feel the same.” He lets out a sigh and runs his fingers through his hair. “You never gave me a reason.”

“Andy,” Allison whispers, but he cuts her off.

“I’m not finished.” She closes her mouth again and nods slowly. “I tried to get over you, but it was almost impossible. You never told me why you left. If you didn’t love me anymore, you could have just told me instead of taking off without warning.”

She shakes her head. “No, that wasn’t it at all. Please tell me you understand that. I thought…” She swallows hard. “I thought that I needed to get away. To see the world.”

“We could have done that together, Allie.”

“But Andy, I _didn’t_ see the world. I went to California, wrote some books. But I didn’t go anywhere else.”

“Why not?” He asks, holding his breath.

“Because…. I knew that it was something I wanted to do with you but that I fucked it up.”

Andy sharply inhales, he can’t help it. There’s a sharp pain under his rib cage that refuses to go away and gets worse when she takes a step closer. 

“You have to mean it this time. You have to tell me what you’re thinking,” Andy says.

She looks like she’s going to reach out and touch him but thinks better of it at the last second. “Andy, I can’t stay here.”

“I’ll go with you,” Andy says without really thinking.

Allison lets out a dry laugh. “Your life is here,” she says. “My life isn’t, not anymore.”

“I want to be part of your life,” he says. He realizes that he does, that Allison has always meant something to him.

“How can you say that?” Allison says, sounding breathless. “After all this time?”

“Because!” He says indignantly. “I’ve wanted to be in your life since the day I met you! You’re the one who made it difficult."

Allison looks down at her bridesmaid dress. She compromised for Claire, Andy can tell that it’s not her style. “I know,” she says, pressing her toe against some gravel.

“I wish you would’ve just talked to me,” Andy says quietly. “I could have helped.”

“You couldn’t have. I’m completely fucked up,” she says. “There’s something wrong with me.”

“Nothing’s wrong with you,” Andy says, and before she can protest, he reaches out and grabs her hand. “Maybe you need to talk to someone, and that’s okay.”

“Stop being so sweet,” she says, letting her hand lay limply in his. “I don’t deserve it. I treated you horribly.”

“We both could have done things differently,” Andy says. And yeah, maybe he’s being too forgiving, but he knows somehow that it’ll be worth it.

“I love you too,” Allison whispers and Andy feels a rush of adrenaline flow through his body. “But I don’t know you anymore, not like I used to, and you don’t know me.”

“Well,” Andy says, rubbing his thumb over her knuckles, “now seems like a good time to start learning.”

~~  
Brian wake up the next morning with a pounding headache and a warm body beside him in bed. It takes him a minute to remember what happened and when he does, his eyes snap open. 

Before he can think of a way to make this situation less awkward, the woman lying next to him sits up and looks down at him. “Woah,” she says, wiping her eyes with one hand while she leans on the other.

“Yeah,” he says, “woah.”

“This is an unexpected development,” Laurie says.

It definitely is, because while he remembers most of last night, he got buzzed enough at Claire and Bender’s wedding reception to not have thought about the consequences of hooking up with his new coworker and high school crush. 

“Yeah,” is all Brian manages to say.

Laurie looks at him and Brian finds that he can’t make eye contact, instead choosing to focus on the ceiling. “Are you okay?” She asks.

He sighs and wipes his hand over his face. “Yeah, are you?”

She pauses and he can still feel her looking at him. “I’m great.”

That gets Brian’s attention. He thought this would be something she immediately regrets. “You’re great?”

“I’m very great,” she says, smiling down at him. “I wish I knew which pick up line of mine worked on you. I used so many.”

Brian widens his eyes and pushes himself up on his elbows. “You were hitting on me.”

“Of course I was. I’ve had a thing for you since senior year. I’ve been pretty obvious about it.”

Brian thinks back to the time when Laurie cooked for him in the home ec classroom and how smitten he was with her. He never imagined that she’d feel the same way.

“You seem shocked,” Laurie says, leaning closer. 

“I am a little shocked,” he says. “You do know you’re out of my league, right?”

“Don’t sell yourself so short,” she says, and she closes the gap between them, bringing her lips to his. His hand moves to her hair like a reflex, like his body remembers some part of last night, and he kisses her back.

When she pulls back, he studies her face. “This is crazy,” he says.

“It’s not,” she says and she traces her hand down the part of his chest that is exposed above the blanket.

Brian smiles and runs his hand through her hair. “I think you told me that you admired my computer skills,” he says, “which I thought was weird because you are obviously just as qualified as I am.”

Laurie laughs and bows her head. “Nothing else was working. I thought you’d respond to flattery.”

“I’ve been told I’m just an idiot,” Brian says. “But I finally figured it out.”

“Good,” Laurie says, and she leans down again.

~~  
Bender wakes up disoriented. It takes him a couple of seconds to remember that no, he’s not at home and yes, he is married. Claire is asleep, leaning her head on his shoulder. She was anxious before they boarded the flight, even though her doctor gave her the all clear to fly. 

He thought that when the reality of the situation hit him, he would have a moment of panic. However, he feels completely calm with the new weight of a ring on his finger. It’s weird, but he almost feels like yesterday was yet another turning point in his life.

He’s never been to Europe, never thought he would be able to end up there, never thought that it would be an option for him. Traveling was for other people, not for him. Except now it is for him and he’s on a plane with his wife about to touch down in Paris.

_Life is good_ , he can’t help but think. _Life is good_.

~~  
Andy doesn’t remember falling asleep, but he wakes up with a start when his head bobs down to his chest. Allison came home with him last night, just to talk, but when he looks over to where she was sitting on the couch the last time he remembers, the seat is empty. 

He doesn’t know what he expected, but it wasn’t this. He didn’t expect her to take off so soon after their conversation. 

Defeated, he reaches up and unties his tie. He’s contemplating going to bed and sleeping for the rest of the day or going into the fridge and drinking his problems away when he hears a sink running and then a door open.

Andy’s heart climbs back into place when he sees her. She’s wearing his clothes and they’re baggy on her. _She was just in the bathroom_ , he thinks. _This isn’t healthy,_ he also thinks. 

Allison’s smile drops off when she sees his face. “I was just in the bathroom,” she says. 

“Yes, well,” Andy says, “I know that now.”

Allison sits next to him and clasps her hands together. “I’m sorry.”

Andy reaches over and takes her hands in his. “We already talked about this.”

“I know,” Allison says. “But I ruined how we used to be.”

Andy shrugs. “For now. It’ll take time.”

“You are far too optimistic,” Allison says. “You should be more angry.”

“I am angry,” he says, sitting up straighter. “I’m angry that you left without a word, that you’ve been in contact with our friends this entire time and no one told me, and that you wouldn’t have come back if it weren’t for Claire and Bender’s wedding. But I’m also optimistic.”

“I’m sorry,” she says again.

“I know,” Andy says. 

“I have to go back to California,” Allison says and Andy’s heart drops without his permission. Her home is there, he knew she had to go back. He knows that she can't stay here. “Only to pick up my boxes and drop off my manuscript. I’m coming back to Shermer for a while, I promise.”

The worst part about it is that Andy doesn’t believe her, not completely. Part of him wants to go with her, wants to hold her hand the entire way there and back so she can’t take off again, but he needs to trust her if this is going to work. He needs to let her come back to him on her own terms.

“Okay,” Andy says. He leans over and presses a kiss to her forehead. “Let’s go get some breakfast at Al’s for old time’s sake.”

Allison smiles and squeezes his hand. “That sounds amazing.”

Andy knows that it’s going to be hard to trust her again, but for now, he’s going to enjoy what he’s got: a second chance.

~~  
It’s a Saturday and she’s almost 7 months pregnant when her mom takes her out to lunch. Bender’s at work, putting in as many hours as he can at his new job before the baby comes, and her mom stopped by their apartment unexpectedly. Claire hasn’t seen her in person since the wedding, although they’ve talked on the phone a few times since she and Bender came back from their honeymoon. Claire finds herself endlessly amazed at how little they have in common.

They’ve just ordered their meal when her mom reaches across the table and grabs her hands. “You’re glowing, honey,” she says. 

Claire forces a smile. People have been saying this since she started showing, but Claire personally doesn’t see it. She just feels swollen. “Thanks, mom,” she says anyway. “How’s dad?”

Her father is the one who has taken this whole thing the hardest. He never liked John and he’s been considerably pissed off since they got married and she started showing. He was also upset that Patrick and Jimmy came to the wedding, but Claire couldn’t care less. 

“He’s coping,” her mom says, like her dad suffered some great loss instead of what actually happened. 

Claire feels the baby move in her stomach, and she looks down and places her hand over her bump instinctively. When she looks back up again, she sees her mom smiling at her. “I remember those days,” she says. “You were much more active than your brother.” Claire hates it when her parents talk about Patrick. They never actually use his name.

Claire decides to stay neutral. She’s closer to her brother than she ever will be to the rest of her family. “Sometimes, it feels like heartburn.”

“I remember that,” her mom says. “I was so nauseous I couldn’t eat.” When Claire wrinkles her nose, she still has morning sickness, her mom shakes her head. “Honestly, it was a blessing. I was trying to watch my figure to keep your father happy.” 

That makes Claire pause. Disregarding the gross comment about keeping her dad happy, something else her mother says makes her uncomfortable. “Watch your figure? How do you do that when you’re pregnant?”

“You’ve got to be strict with yourself,” she says, but then her eyes roam to Claire’s stomach. “But you’re already bigger than I ever was.”

Claire feels herself flushing as she narrows her eyes. “Really?”

Before her mom can say anything, the waitress comes and places their food down in front of them. And even though Claire’s mother eyes the pasta Claire has in front of her, she doesn’t say anything else.

~~  
After Claire gets back from lunch with her mom, she sits in silence for a long time. Then, she walks into the bathroom and stares at herself in the mirror. The longer she watches her reflection, the bigger her belly looks. 

She doesn’t know what time it is when she hears Bender come in. She hears the jingle of the keys as they hit the counter and the sound of him walking to the bedroom. 

“Babe?” She hears him say. She takes a stuttering deep breath before turning around and meeting him in the bedroom.

“Hey,” she says softly. He smiles before leaning down to kiss her chastely. He’s been more open with affection since she got pregnant, especially since she started showing. Something about it makes her excited.

He pulls back and brushes her hair back behind her ear. Whatever he sees on her face causes him to frown. “What happened?”

“My mother stopped by,” she says. “She brought me to lunch.”

Bender groans. He doesn’t like her parents, not just because of the way they’ve treated him but also the way they’ve always treated her. He’s made this fact known. “What did she say to you?”

“Do you remember,” Claire says, “what you said to me when you asked me what my name was?”

“In detention?” Bender asks, but the look on his face tells her that he has no idea what she’s talking about.

Claire isn’t surprised that he doesn’t remember. It was 5 years ago and he admitted much later that he was mostly talking out of his ass just to get her attention. “Yeah.”

“I don’t,” he says, “but I’m guessing that it wasn’t good.”

Claire sits on the edge of their bed and lies back on top of the quilt. She rubs her hand over her swollen stomach, feeling the baby move under her skin again. Bender sits down next to her and places his hand next to hers. “Do you think I’m fat?” She asks.

He looks down at her and raises his brow. “Is that a trick question?”

Claire could get mad at him for that, but she finds that she can’t. Instead, she moves her hand so it’s resting over his. “No,” she says, thinking again about her conversation with her mother. “What I mean is, are you happy?” 

John looks more confused than before and she can’t blame him for that. “Yeah, I’m happy,” he says. “What did your mom say, exactly?”

She needs to know, needs to quell this insecurity that’s building inside of her, and she needs to make sure he isn’t lying. Instead of asking, she reaches up, winds her fingers in his hair, and pulls him down. He makes a muffled noise of surprise when their lips meet, but he melts into the kiss quickly. He lies on his side next to her, careful not to crush her stomach.

Deepening the kiss, he slides his hand under the hem of her dress and runs it up her side. He brushes his fingertips against her swollen middle, over her stretch marks and new pockets of fat. When she bites down on his lip, he moans and opens his mouth above her. She can feel him growing hard against her thigh.

He’s touching her like he wants her. She knows him well enough now to know that he wouldn’t fake it. She doesn’t realize that she’s crying until John pulls back and brushes a tear off her cheek with his thumb. “Claire,” he whispers, “am I missing something?”

Claire tries to smile, to play it off. “Do you still think Claire’s a fat girl’s name?” Claire sees the second John realized what she’s talking about and he hangs his head in shame.

“I remember now,” he says. “I’ve told you before, I was just trying to get under your skin. And, I’m sorry.”

She knows that he is, he’s apologized for sticking his head between her legs and for some of the other things he said and she apologized too. They were both young and stupid and they’ve both been through way too much together for her to hold it against him. “I know you are,” she says. “It’s just... my mom said something at lunch today. Something about how she didn’t gain weight when she was pregnant to keep my dad happy.” Bender wrinkles his nose, probably also disgusted by the thought of her parents together.

“Your parents are fucking weird, we already knew that,” he says and she laughs. She can’t say that he’s wrong.

“Well, I’m not my mother and I’m going to gain weight. This baby has cravings,” she says. 

“You’re worried about me?” Bender says, his tone incredulous. “You’re creating a whole new human being in your body and you’re worried about what I think?” 

“I just don’t want you to regret this,” Claire blurts out and as much as she wishes that she hadn’t, she needs him to hear it.

He looks at her for a long moment, studying her in a way that makes her feel too vulnerable. She’s about to look away when his expression changes. “Sweets,” he says and she lights up at the sound of her old nickname. “I hate to break it to you, but I’m always going to think that you’re hot.”

Claire laughs and she’s crying again. “Always?”

“Always,” he says. “We’re married now. I’m going to find you hot even when we’re old and wrinkly and our kids are all grown and have kids of their own. You better get that through your head.” He pokes her forehead with his pointer finger. 

She would say something back, but she’s so choked up by tears that she can’t even speak. She always gets overwhelmed when he’s like this. He leans down and kisses her again softly. “I know I shouldn’t listen to my mom,” she says when he pulls away. “If low self-esteem were a competition, she’d win every time.”

“We’re not like them, Cherry,” he says and she grimaces at the evidently untrue nickname. “Our souls aren’t dead yet.”

“You’re right,” Claire says, smiling. “Our souls aren’t dead.” After a beat, she brushes his hair back. “I love you.”

“I love you, too,” he says. “I’m gonna go run through the shower before we go meet the others for dinner.” He pinches her shoulder lightly before standing up again. Claire watches him go, shutting the bathroom door behind him. 

Tonight she’s going to sit at dinner with her best friends and her husband and she’s going to enjoy it. Screw her parents, she’s got her own life to live.

~~  
Allison sits in between his legs, her back against his chest. The lavender scented bubbles surround them like a white cloud, and Andy plays with the ends of her hair with his fingers.

It’s nice being back together, it’s like how it was years ago when it first began. He loves her now as much as he did then, but in a different way.

She turns her head to the side and presses a soft kiss against his shoulder. 

“We have to get up,” Andy says, wrapping his arms around her. “We’ll be late for dinner.”

Allison curls closer into his chest and he smiles. They just got back from a session with Allison’s psychologist. When she got back from California, and she did come back, she moved into Brian’s apartment. She’s rarely ever there, choosing to spend her time at Andy’s place. One night while they were in bed, Andy asked if she had ever talked to anyone after she graduated from school.

The answer was no, but the following day, Allison called around until she found one. Andy has been with her a few times, just to talk things out, and he thinks that it’s helping. Allison hasn’t given up on it yet, so he takes it as a win.

“We really have to get ready,” Andy repeats, but when Allison sits up, he misses her warmth immediately. She pulls the plug of the bathtub and the water starts to drain.

“Let’s do it, then,” Allison says as she stands up. 

“Yes,” Andy says, joining her and leaning over to press a kiss to her lips. “Let’s.”

Before Andy can stop her, she reaches behind her and turns on the shower head, blasting him with cold water. Before he can react in any way, she reaches up and brushes a wet strand of hair out of his face. He finds that he can’t be mad about it because she laughs with her whole chest. 

~~  
“How do I look?” She asks and Brian looks up from the book he was reading. 

She’s wearing a short red dress with her hair pulled back and as he looks at her, he finds that he has no idea why she’s asking him. She, as always, looks perfect.

“Beautiful,” he says, dropping his book to the side and approaching her. “As always.”

“You flatter me any more, my ego might grow too big for this apartment,” she jokes as she turns around, motioning for Brian to zip up the back of her dress.

This thing with Laurie came out of nowhere and blew up fast. They work together, on opposite sides of the same floor, and they practically live together. It turns out that Laurie has had a crush on Brian as long as Brian has on her. It was a wild revelation, one that still excites him if he thinks about it.

They didn’t tell anyone for a month or so, enjoying the secrecy and lack of drama. At first, Brian was worried that Allison would find out since she technically lives with him, but she was never home and always at Andy’s place. 

Eventually though, everyone found out. Apparently, most of them suspected the entire time.

Tonight, they’re getting dressed up to go to a nice dinner with his friends who, in the years following graduation, have become Laurie’s friends too.

“Ready?” Laurie asks. All he has to do is tie his tie, so he nods. She reaches up and knots the fabric, sticking her tongue out slightly while she focuses. 

“Now you’re ready,” Laurie says, pulling the knot tight. He leans down and kisses her lightly.

“Let’s go,” Brian says, wrapping his arm around her waist and leading them outside.

~~  
The dinner place Claire picked out is nice, nicer than anywhere Bender has been in a long time. They don’t eat out very often and when they do, they usually just go to Al’s for breakfast.

Claire insisted on a nice dinner since everyone is in town and is getting along. The honeymoon flew by and before he knew it, they were back in Illinois. He liked Paris and London too, but he mostly enjoyed watching Claire in her element. She practiced her French and made him eat all the fancy food served to them while Bender fell more in love.

Allison and Andy made up after the wedding and got back together shortly after Allison came back from California. While Bender expected them to be fine once they had a conversation, he was surprised that Andy forgave her so quickly. 

Brian and Laurie started dating some time in there, but Bender can’t remember exactly when. Things have been busy at work and as Claire’s pregnancy has progressed, the more distracted he’s become. They’ve been accumulating baby stuff since they got back from the honeymoon and they have set up a crib in their bedroom. 

With every new item they buy and every doctor’s appointment, the reality of impending parenthood seeps in a little more. 

Claire gets stopped in public by strangers with no boundaries who touch her stomach without asking and ask her when she’s due. Bender’s immediate reaction is usually anger, but Claire is patient in a way that those people don’t deserve. 

Claire is wearing a dress she bought just for the the occasion, and because it’s a maternity dress, she likely won’t have another opportunity to wear it any time soon. She looks beautiful, but Bender always thinks she does. 

She’s no longer upset about what her mother said to her for now. Bender hopes that it was just her mother and that he hasn’t said anything in recent years make her feel that way. He’s made it his new goal to make sure that she never feels like that again.

He’s sitting next to her at the circular table as their friends file in, Andy and Allison showing up first. A couple minutes later, Brian and Laurie arrive. Bender has to admit that he doesn’t really mind Laurie’s company, especially since she started dating Brian. 

Claire chats with Allison on one side while Bender half listens to Brian talking about computers. It’s not that Bender doesn’t care about what Brian has to say, he just doesn’t really understand it. He mechanically understands how a computer works, but coding is a whole other story. 

Soon enough, the waiter delivers their drinks. Claire, Bender, and Allison opted for soda while Laurie got a mixed drink of some kind and Brian and Andy ordered beers. When the waiter walks away, Brian lifts up his drink. 

“A toast,” Brian says.

“To what?” Allison asks, a smirk on her face.

Brian rolls his eyes and raises his glass higher. “To us.”

Brian’s sentimentality always rears its head whenever they’re all together, but Bender has found that he’s been sentimental in his own right lately. He looks over at Claire, who is holding up her glass of soda water and is already smiling at him. He then turns to looks at Brian, who is still holding his glass up.

“To us,” Bender says, clinking his glass against Brian’s.

~~  
Andy is naked and wrapped in his comforter when he realizes that Allison is pretending to be asleep next to him. 

He knows her inside and out, learning her patterns again after the two and a half year break, and he knows from past experience that Allison pretending to do _anything_ is a bad sign. 

“Allie,” Andy says, reaching his hand over and findings hers in the pile of blankets. When they got home from dinner, Allison was all over him from the second they walked through the door. He took it in stride at the time, just happy to have her close, but now that he thinks about it, she is behaving just how she did at the lake house. 

“Allie,” he says again. “I know you’re awake.”

Allison rolls onto her back and looks him, her bangs covering her eyes in the dark. “I wasn’t hiding,” she says. “I was just thinking.” 

“Thinking about what?” Andy says, but he already knows.

“I was trying to come up with a way to tell you without hurting you like I did last time,” Allison says and Andy’s heart sinks. “I have to leave.”

Andy takes a deep breath. “Okay.”

“I’m claustrophobic here,” she says. “And it has nothing to do with how I feel about you.”

Andy exhales. “Okay,” he says again, “but can we wait a couple of months? Claire’s due soon and I’m about to graduate from my law program.”

“We?” Allison says, furrowing her brow.

“Well, yeah,” Andy says. “You weren’t planning on going without me, were you?”

Allison looks stunned speechless which surprises Andy a bit, because doesn’t she know he would cross the Earth on foot for her? “I don’t want to drag you along,” she finally says, picking her fingers on her free hand.

“You know I’d do anything for you,” he says.

“I would do the same for you,” Allison says. “You know that. I just don’t want you to have to.”

“I already told you that I wanted to see the world with you. There’s no time like the present, right?” 

“What can you do with a law degree abroad?” Allison asks, tucking her arm under her head.

“I’ll figure it out,” he says, rolling over on his side to face her straight on. “Why are you trying to talk me out of this?”

“I don’t know,” Allison says. “Are you sure this is what you want?”

“Yes, Allison,” Andy says. “There’s nothing keeping me here and I want to go where you want to go.”

Allison stares at him for a while before leaning forward and pressing her lips to his. “I don’t deserve this from you.”

“It’s also for me,” Andy says before kissing her again. “We’re going to be just fine.”

“Yes,” she says, smiling so wide he can see her teeth in the dark. “Yes, we will.”

~~  
Another month or so passes and Allison is officially moved out of Brian’s apartment. While she packed her boxes and prepared for her and Andy’s trip abroad, Laurie all but completely moved in and took her place in his apartment.

This is the best relationship Brian’s ever been in. It’s simple: he loves her and she feels the same way. Of course, he hasn’t said it yet, it feels too early. He’s sure that she’s aware of the full extent of his feelings.

Brian is waiting for the doorbell to ring while Laurie is doing her make up in the upstairs bathroom. Larry and Anne Lester are coming over for dinner and Anne is bringing her new boyfriend along. Brian kept in touch with the Lesters after graduation and when he started dating Laurie, he made it clear to her that getting along with them was important to him. 

He wasn’t expecting Laurie to call Anne and personally apologize for everything that happened in high school right away, but that’s exactly what she did. Laurie met Anne for dinner to hash things out and ever since then, a bimonthly dinner date has occurred at Brian’s apartment.

Things are about to change though, as Larry just got engaged to his college girlfriend and is planning on following his fiancée to Texas. Brian feels weird, because even though he’s in a serious relationship and has a “grown-up” job, he feels like everyone around him is growing up faster than he is.

The doorbell breaks through his thoughts and when Brian reaches the door, he pulls it open. “Hey, Larry,” Brian says, stepping aside to let him in. “Where’s Anne and her new guy?”

“They’re right behind me,” Larry says. “I seriously think there’s someone out there who has it out for me.”

“What do you mean?” Brian says, holding up his arms to take Larry’s coat. 

“Just wait and see,” Larry says, and before Brian can ask any follow up questions, Laurie appears in the entryway. 

“Hi, Larry,” she says, offering him a smile. “How have you been?”

“I’ve been alright,” he says. “You?”

Laurie smiles and is about to answer him until something over Brian’s shoulder catches her eye. She raises an eyebrow as Brian hears the door open.

“Stubby?” She asks, and Brian turns around to see Andy’s ex-best friend from high school standing in the doorway of his apartment with his arm around Larry’s sister.

“Murphy,” he says as Brian shuts the door behind him. “It’s been a while.”

Laurie leads Anne and Stubby further into the apartment and Larry nudges Brian’s shoulder. “See what I mean?”

“Yeah,” Brian says, hanging Larry’s coat on a hook and looking after them in disbelief. “I do.”

~~  
Brian quickly finds out that Anne and Stubby, who now goes by David, met at college when she was a sophomore and he was a junior. They reconnected recently when Stubby showed up at school for some alumni event and she was there organizing it. 

Brian understands why Larry thinks that someone out there has a sick sense of humor. He can’t seem to escape the old popular crowd from high school. Stubby seems nice enough, but he’s a lot more quiet than Brian remembers. He doesn’t say much of anything, instead spending most of the night looking at Anne and responding to Laurie’s occasional question.

Dinner flies by, mostly due to the conversation, and soon enough they’re getting ready to leave. 

“You’ll come and visit, right?” Larry asks as Brian loads dishes into the dishwasher and Laurie gets Anne and Stubby’s coats. “Janet would love to have you.”

“Of course I will,” Brian says. “I’m going to miss you.”

“I’m going to miss you too, Bri,” Larry says, laying a hand on his shoulder. “We’ve been through a lot together.”

Brian thinks back to their childhood, to middle school, to the physics club. During every big event in his life, Larry was always there. 

“This growing up thing really sucks,” Brian says. Larry squeezes his hand before dropping it down by his side. 

“You’ve done alright for yourself,” Larry says. 

“We all have,” Brian says as Laurie, Anne, and Stubby rejoin them. “Give me a call when you get settled.”

“Of course,” Larry says, smiling.

Brian feels like it’s the end of an era. He’s been feeling like that a lot lately, with Allison and Andy planning on leaving for an indefinite period of time and Bender and Claire about to have a kid. With Larry leaving on top of that, Brian feels as though he’s getting left behind again. 

Before he can get too lost in his head, Laurie wraps her arm around his waist and it grounds him. The Lesters and Stubby say their goodbyes and Brian and Laurie watch them leave from the doorway. 

“Are you okay?” Laurie asks as Brian shuts the front door.

Brian looks down at her and presses a soft kiss to her forehead. “Yeah,” he says, “I’m okay.” 

“Good, because I have an idea.”

“An idea?” 

“You know how you’ve been trying to convince me to watch those Star Wars movies?” Laurie asks and Brian raises his eyebrows. “Consider me convinced.”

Brian can’t hold back the smile that forms on his face. So maybe the old era is over, but this new one seems like it’ll be just as good.

“Well, you can’t back out now,” he says, leading them to the living room. 

“Wouldn’t dream of it,” Laurie says as she settles on the couch while Brian digs into the VHS drawer. “The only thing I know about these movies is that Luke has a father, but I couldn’t tell you who.”

Brian laughs as he pulls out _A New Hope_. “You better prepare yourself for a wild ride.”

“Oh, I’m ready,” Laurie says. 

“Good,” Brian says and he presses play. 

~~  
“Fuck,” Claire says. “Fucking shit.”

“What?” Bender says, fighting the panic instinct to slam on the breaks in the middle of the highway. Claire rarely swears.

They’re on their way to meet Patrick and Jimmy at a restaurant in the city. They’re leaving for Boston in a month and Claire has been trying to spend as much time with them as possible before they move. 

“I think I just ruined your truck,” she says and she groans. “And I think my water just broke.”

”Oh fuck,” Bender says and all thoughts of lunch leave his brain. “Shit, okay. Hospital?”

“I don’t know, I’m not prepared for this. She’s early,” Claire says and Bender can hear her voice quiver.

Bender switches lanes to get off the next exit and spares a quick look over at Claire, who is tearing up. “She?”

Claire lets out a laugh that sounds like a sob. “I have a feeling.”

It sinks in, not for the first time, that Bender is about to be a father. For some reason, he always figured it would be a boy. He doesn’t see himself as someone who could have a _daughter_. 

“Okay,” Bender says. “Hospital.”

“Hospital,” Claire says. “Oh God.”

John doesn’t realize that he’s speeding until he pulls into the parking garage not five minutes later. At least, he thinks it was five minutes. He really has no way of knowing because of the adrenaline rushing through his veins.

Claire groans as he pulls into a parking spot. “Ouch, what the fuck is that?”

Bender throws the car in park and looks over at her while she pushes against her back. “I think that would be a contraction, Sweets.”

“Oh God, I don’t like it,” Claire says. Bender knows from the parenting classes that Claire dragged him to that they are only going to get worse from here. He knows better than to say that out loud, so he just hops out of the car to go help her. 

“Let’s get you inside,” Bender says after opening the passenger door and offering her his arm.

“Okay, but we will have to call the restaurant to tell Patrick and Jimmy that we aren’t coming,” Claire says and she groans again. 

“Priorities, Claire,” Bender says as he watches her carefully get out of the car.

“Shut up,” she says, but she leans on him for support as he leads her inside.

~~  
Labor takes a long time. Bender knew this in theory, especially since this is Claire’s first child, but he hadn’t expected to be sitting around for hours. 

He called Patrick and Jimmy at the restaurant first, while Claire was getting checked in and brought to a room. Then, he called Allison and Brian. Now, he’s pacing around Claire’s hospital room while a nurse monitors her contractions and the baby’s heart rate. 

“John, you’re stressing me out,” Claire says from where she’s lying in bed.

“Sorry, sorry,” he says, settling at the end of her bed.

“Another contraction coming,” the nurse says as Claire clutches her abdomen. Bender stands up again and stations himself at the head of her bed. She grabs his hand as he coaches her to breathe, just like he was taught in the classes. 

It fades after a while and Claire’s grip on his hand loosens. Once Claire’s breathing evens out again, she wipes the back of her hand across her forehead. “This fucking hurts,” she says, turning her head towards him. “You did this to me.”

“It takes two to tango, Sweets,” he says and he barely dodged the punch she throws towards his arm. 

“Go check to see if our friends are here before I have another contraction,” she says, grimacing as she tries to reposition. “Or before I kill you. Whichever happens first.”

Bender rolls his eyes but drops a kiss on her forehead before leaving the room. “Try not to miss me too much.”

“Won’t be an issue,” she says, groaning again.

Bender walks down the hall towards the waiting room. When he rounds the corner, he sees Allison, Brian, Andy, Laurie, Patrick, and Jimmy taking up most of the chairs. When they see him, they all stand up almost simultaneously.

“At ease,” Bender says. “I’m not the president.”

“How is she?” Andy asks as everyone watches Bender with wide eyes.

“She’s okay,” Bender says, “but it’s going to be a while.” With that, everyone sits back down again. As he looks around at his friends and Claire’s family, he realizes that some important people are missing. “Has anyone called her parents yet?”

The looks that he gets in response tell him everything he needs to know. “We thought you might have already,” Brian says, having the good idea to look sheepish.

“It probably isn’t a good idea for us to be here when they get here,” Patrick says. “They wouldn’t like it.”

“Well, Claire wants you here, so they’ll have to deal. I’ll have the nurse call them when she gets closer,” Bender says, eager to shift the responsibility to someone who isn’t him. 

“Get back in there,” Allison says, sending him a smirk. 

Bender shakes his head, but turns around and heads back down he hallway he came.

~~  
Labor takes a long time, but it progresses quickly. Claire ends up in a squatting position with Bender trying to support her the best he can. The whole thing is a bit horrific and he doesn’t fully understand the whole “beauty of childbirth” thing, but he does know that he’ll never be able to give Claire a hard time about anything ever again.

Claire refused an epidural for some unknown (and in his opinion, incomprehensible) reason and she’s gripping his hand so hard that he knows it’s going to bruise. The doctor and the nurse assured them that she’s getting close.

“You can do this, Claire,” he says.

“Shut up,” she groans weakly, leaning her head on his shoulder. 

“It’ll all be worth it in the end,” he says, trying to practice affirmations like he learned in the birthing class. “You’re doing amazing.”

“ _Shut up_.”

~~  
Labor takes a long time, but when it’s over it almost feels like it didn’t happen. Well, not exactly. She feels pain in places that she’s never felt pain before and she aches all over, but her baby is making the most adorable cooing noise and she finds that she doesn’t care at all.

Claire had really not emotionally prepared herself to see John Bender hold her baby in his arms. 

“You were right,” he says.

“About what?” Claire says, her eyes locked on her baby and her husband.

“It’s a girl,” he says. “We never thought about names.”

“No we didn’t,” Claire says. She’s usually well-prepared for things like this, but picking baby names seemed to make something that didn’t feel real, real.

“We should probably brainstorm.”

“Probably a good idea.”

Her friends, her brother, and her parents have already cycled through and met the baby. Claire is so exhausted that she barely remembers it, but she’s pretty sure she asked Allison to be the baby’s godmother.

“What about Lily?” John asks. Claire furrows her brow at him but he doesn’t notice, his attention completely captured by their daughter.

“I like it,” Claire says. “Did you just come up with that?”

“It was my grandmother’s name on my mom’s side. She died when I was young, but she always looked out for me,” he says. Bender doesn’t talk much about his childhood, mainly because he doesn’t remember most of it. She always makes sure to give him her full attention when he does talk about it.

“I love it,” she says. “What about a middle name?”

“Allison?” Bender asks, looking up at her. Claire holds out her arms and John gently places her baby in her arms. 

Her baby lets out a yawn and pushes one of her arms out of her swaddle. Claire offers her finger and her daughter wraps her hand around it. Before Claire starts crying, not for the first time today, she leans forward and presses a kiss to her soft head.

“Lily Allison Bender,” Claire says. “She’s perfect.”

“She is,” Bender says as Lily breaks her second hand free from the swaddle. John offers his finger and she wraps her hand around it. 

“What now?” Claire whispers, unable to peel her eyes away from the tiny human in her arms.

“We’ll figure it out,” Bender says. “We always do.”

“I love you,” Claire says, tears threatening to spill over again.

“I’m not sure if you’re talking to me, but I love you too,” Bender says before leaning in and kissing her.

“Good,” she says. “Because everything is about to change.”

~~  
When Allison wakes up, she immediately starts crying.

Andy, as sweet as he always is, jumps in to comfort her, even though he has no idea what’s going on. 

“Allie, what’s wrong?” Andy says, rubbing her back. 

“Nothing’s wrong,” Allison says, letting out a laugh through her tears. “We’re leaving today.”

“We are,” Andy says. “And that’s okay?”

He sounds nervous and when she realizes why, she reaches up and wipes her tears. She’s put him through so much, even though that was never her intention. She thought she was saving him from having to deal with her, but she now knows that her brain was playing tricks on her.

Still, she can’t take back the hurt that she caused him. However, she can do her best to make sure she doesn’t do it again.

Allison cups his face. “It’s more than okay.”

“So, why are you crying?” Andy asks.

Allison left last time without saying goodbye, she thought it would be easier that way. This time, she has to say goodbye to Brian, who has been so sweet since her return and has read all of her books cover to cover; to Laurie, who has become an unexpected friend; to Claire, who’s just had her first baby, a baby that shares Allison’s name; and to Bender, her brother and best friend. 

Part of her wants to run and never look back like she always planned, but she’s not made for it anymore. She has a family now and this lovely boy in front of her who is willing to love her despite everything.

“I’m overwhelmed,” she says. “But I’m ready.”

“Good,” he says, “because we have to go.”

Allison looks over her shoulder at the clock. “Shit, we really have to go.”

“I’ll call a cab while you run through the shower,” Andy says, leaning over to pick his discarded shirt off the floor.

“Sounds like a plan, Sporto,” Allison says, kissing his forehead and dashing out of bed. 

~~  
“Babe, where’s that extra package of diapers?” Bender shouts, trying to make his voice heard over the running shower and the screaming baby.

“Should be in the diaper bag,” Claire yells back. 

Bender wonders if it’s some kind of parent’s curse that they can never find the things they need when they’re in a rush. Lily keeps them up most of the night, crying to be fed, changed, or held. Because of their sleep deprivation, they slept in too late and now have to rush to get to the airport on time.

“Found them,” he says, pulling the package out of the bag. “Yes, I know that you’re upset, Peanut. I’m working on it.”

Lily continues to wail as Bender changes her diaper in record time. He’s gotten good at it over the last few weeks. Once the clean diaper is on, he zips up her onesie and picks her up. 

“Hello,” he says, bouncing her up and down as her cries slow. 

Claire opens the bathroom door with her hair still in a towel and takes her from him. “I’ll have to feed her on the way,” she says.

“We have to leave now if we’re going to make it to the gate in time,” Bender says, looking at his watch. He’s become a person who wears a watch and he doesn’t know how to feel about that at all. 

“Let’s go then,” Claire says, making her way towards the door. 

Bender reaches out and spins her around by her shoulder. He pinches the towel perched on her head between his fingers and pulls. The towel falls down and her damp red hair falls with it. Before she can protest too much, he leans over, being mindful of Lily, and pecks her lips.

“Now, let’s go,” he says, smiling as she rolls her eyes at him.

~~  
“Where is everyone?” Brian asks, looking down at his watch, then up at the crowd in front of him. 

“You’re always early to everything,” Laurie says, resting her head on his shoulder. “It’s an admirable trait, but not one that everyone else has."

“We’re not early, we’re on time. I’m surprised that Andy and Allison aren’t here,” Brian says, scanning the crowd again. “They’re cutting it close.”

“That’s not really out of character,” she says, taking his hand. “Stop fretting. They’ll get here.”

As if she willed it into existence, Claire and Bender make their way through the crowd, Bender holding Lily in his arms. Laurie jumps up and Brian follows, rushing forward to greet them. 

“Thank God you’re here,” Laurie says, making a bee line towards Bender so she can get a look at Lily. “Brian was starting to worry.”

“Oh, we can’t have that,” Bender says, smirking at Brian. Brian knows he’s type A and he’s not ashamed of it. 

“Andy and Allison are the ones who need to be on time,” Brian says as he cozies up behind his girlfriend to get a look at Lily Bender. She’s the cutest baby he has ever seen, but he may be a little biased. 

“Well, luckily for you, here they are,” Claire says, nodding her head towards the crowd.

“Not luckily for me, luckily for them that they didn’t miss their flight,” Brian says, turning his gaze away from Lily and towards his friends.

When Allison and Andy approach, the friend group erupts, enveloping the two travelers in hugs. Bender hangs back with Lily, but Allison approaches him on her own. Brian doesn’t hear what she says because Andy punches his arm before pulling him close.

“I’m gonna miss you, Bri,” Andy says as Brian wraps his arms around him. 

“I’m gonna miss you too.”

“Final call for boarding on Flight 257 to Ireland,” the flight attendant says over the loudspeaker. 

“That’s you,” Brian says, pulling back. 

And while he’s happy for them and he knows Claire and Bender are too, it’s going to be a lot different from now on. When Allison left the first time, it was hard to deal with because it was so unexpected, but he was able to talk to her on the phone when he wanted to. Andy was still around, even though he was heartbroken.

This time, two members of their group are leaving and they’re not going to be reachable by telephone. They’re moving on.

That’s life, and Brian has become accustomed to the changing tides. That doesn’t mean that it doesn’t hurt when it happens.

“Ready Allie?” Andy says. Claire took Lily at some point so Bender could hug Allison and when she pulls back, she has tears in her eyes.

“I’m ready,” she says, reaching for his hand. 

“I guess this is goodbye,” Andy says.

“Not on your life, Sporto,” Bender says. “You better call.”

“We will,” Allison promises.

“We love you,” Claire says as Andy picks up their bags.

“We love you too,” Allison says back.

Brian waves as they walk towards the gate entrance and doesn’t stop until they disappear into the tunnel. They’re the last people to board and the flight attendant shuts the door behind them.

“What now?” Claire asks.

“Al’s for lunch?” Bender suggests.

“That sounds amazing,” Laurie says, slipping her hand into his. “Does that sound good to you, Brian?”

Brian looks at his remaining friends and then back at the plane where Andy and Allison disappeared. He turns back to them and says, “Definitely.”


	2. 1994

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Hello, Sir,” the voice says from behind him. Bender turns around and finds himself face to face with Richard Vernon. “Welcome back to Shermer High. Don’t forget to pick up a name tag.”
> 
> He wishes Claire weren’t already inside because she would get a kick out of this. Bender crosses his arms over his chest and coldly regards his former vice principal. “You don’t recognize me, do you?”

Right before Owen was born, John bought Claire a house. Lily was almost 2 and the three of them were outgrowing their tiny apartment. John had started his own garage and was starting to grow its client base. Meanwhile, Claire had just gotten a big promotion at work. Things seemed to be coming together for them. 

One day, when John picked her up with Lily from work, he drove them a few miles to the next town over and pulled up in front of a small two story cottage.

“What’s this?” Claire asked, hand on her swollen belly. 

“This is a beginning,” he said before offering her his hand.

Claire fluffs his pillow before setting it in his side of the bed against the frame. She knows that he picked this place so he could work on it, but one of the bigger perks was that it was out of Shermer, even though only slightly. West Bethhamp is the same in every way except that it’s not in the Shermer school district, something Bender has wanted since they had Lily. 

It’s a Saturday, but John’s still at work. One of the downsides of owning a new business is having to put in the extra hours on the weekend when he’d rather be at home with her and the kids. She understands the feeling; ever since she was promoted to VP and took on a more corporate role at her company, she works more than she would like to.

But they live a comfortable life and their kids are well cared for. Lily just started preschool at the beginning of the school year which Claire thought would calm her down a bit, but instead had the opposite effect. She’s a wild child and she definitely got it from John. 

Owen is only 3, but he seems more like Claire in nature and in looks. He has her signature red hair that sits in tiny ringlets on his head. He never cried as a baby and wasn’t as fussy as Lily, which was much appreciated after almost a year and a half without sleep following Lily’s birth.

Owen babbles from where he’s sitting in the play pen Claire has set up in their bedroom. She smiles at him before bending over to pick him up. She bounces him on her hip as his hands fly to her hair. He’s always got his fingers tangled in her curls, and Claire finds it so adorable that she doesn’t mind most of the time. Unless he pulls. 

“Momma!” She hears Lily yell from downstairs.

“What, baby?” Claire yells back. Claire learned very quickly not to go running every time Lily yells her name. Most of the time, she just wants to show off something she’s made or found in the yard.

“There’s a car in the driveway,” she says and that gets Claire’s attention.

“It’s not Daddy’s?” Claire says. It would not be entirely abnormal for her parents to show up to visit, but Lily would recognize their car as well. It could also be Laurie, but Claire is curious enough to check it out herself. 

“No,” Lily says, and Claire can hear her little feet run across the floor.

“Do not open the door for strangers,” Claire says, holding on tight to her son as she rushes down the stairs.

Of course, Lily doesn’t listen to her and Claire finds her standing in the open doorway. Before Claire can scold her, she catches sight of the person standing on their front stoop and she gasps.

“Oh my God,” Claire says as Allison Reynolds stares back at her.

“Miss me?” She asks, a dazzling smile on her face.

“What are you doing here?” Claire asks Allison, shaking her head in shock. “I thought you were somewhere in Italy.”

“Andy’s dad died,” Allison says, “and we missed you.”

“Who are you?” Lily asks, quite rudely if you ask Claire, but she never was one for manners. Claire rests her hand on Lily’s shoulder and moves so Allison can get by. 

“Lily, this is your Auntie Allison,” Claire says. Lily doesn’t remember Allison, since the last time she saw her, she was only a few weeks old. She’s spoken to Allison on the phone quite often, but Andy and Allison haven’t been back in the States in five years. 

“You’ve grown up, Lily,” Allison says. 

“Come inside,” Claire says. “Let’s sit.”

~~  
Bender is covered head to toe in grease and he’s been biting his tongue all day. Becoming a father was an exercise in patience that he greatly benefited from today. His new mechanic messed something up with a customer’s car early this morning. Bender fixed it, of course he did, but it took him much longer than he wanted to.

He wanted to be home hours ago. 

He doesn’t think it’s very fair of him to leave Claire alone with the kids all day, but she insists that it’s fine. He doesn’t deserve her, but she disagrees.

Bender is so tired when he pulls into his driveway that it takes him far too long to realize that there is another car in the driveway that he does not recognize. His brain is foggy and he doesn’t think he can deal with talking to anyone other than his wife and his children, so he plans on saying a quick hello to their mystery guest before rushing up to take a shower.

He realizes that something is off when Lily doesn’t come running to the door like she usually does. He hears Claire laugh as he turns around the corner to the living room. 

At first he thinks he’s hallucinating, delirious from being overworked, but he blinks a few times and still sees Allison Reynolds sitting on his couch with his daughter in her lap.

“Nutcase?” Bender says while Lily yelps and jumps up. Owen waddles after her and grabs his leg. 

“Don’t-” Claire warns, but it’s already too late. He scoops her up as she wraps her arms around his neck. Claire doesn’t usually let Lily hug him until after he’s showered, one too many of her outfits being ruined by car grease. 

“Hello,” Allison says casually, as if she hasn’t been gone for five years. 

“What are you doing here?” He asks and Lily wiggles in his arms. She always likes the idea of being held more than actually being held. Owen is still holding onto his leg with a death grip, so he reaches down and ruffles his hair. 

“Come on, let’s go get cleaned up for dinner,” Claire says, standing and grabbing Owen’s hand. She places her free hand on John’s shoulder and squeezes before disappearing with the kids. 

Allison stands and smiles, looking the same but also older in some indescribable way. “You’ve gone fully domestic on me, Bender.”

“It was bound to happen at some point,” Bender says, crossing his arms. “What are you doing here?” 

She sobers enough for him to realize that something happened to bring her home. “Andy’s dad had a heart attack,” she says. “He didn’t make it.”

“Damn,” Bender says. “How’s Andy holding up?”

“He’s with his family right now,” she says. “I honestly can’t tell what he’s thinking.”

Bender knows the feeling. In fact, he and Andy had a conversation about this exact situation years ago, before they graduated. “Damn,” he says again. 

“Yeah, that pretty much sums it up,” Allison says. “I think we’re supposed to hug or something.”

“You think so?” Bender asks, smirking. “That doesn’t seem like us.”

“Maybe not, but it’s been five years and I missed you, asshole,” she says.

“Ugh, fine,” he says, but he opens his arms and she wraps hers around him. “You’ve changed, Allison Reynolds.”

She hums before leaning back. “In more ways than one,” she says, holding up her left hand. 

“When the fuck did that happen?” He asks, laughter in his voice. If it was anyone else he’d probably be pissed that they didn’t tell him, but Allison has always done things her own way.

“Not too long ago,” she says. 

“Nutcase,” Bender says, shaking his head. “I’m glad you’re back.”

Allison surprises him when she smiles and says, “Me too.”

~~  
Andy got the call early in the morning while Allison was asleep next to him in a villa just outside of Florence. They had planned on having a lazy morning. They had spent most of the previous day touring a vineyard before coming back to the villa where Andy fed Allison grapes while they lounged in the sun. The shrill ring of the telephone was not a welcome one, but Andy slid out of bed, out of Allison’s arms and walked across the room to answer it.

“Hello?” 

“Andy?” He heard her voice and recognized her immediately.

“Lucy? What’s wrong?” He asked his sister. Lucy was thirteen when he left on his trip and he hasn’t seen her since, but he calls home often. At eighteen, she sounded much more grown up than the girl he left in Shermer.

“It’s Dad,” she said and Andy tensed. While Andy called home every time they traveled to a new place, both to check in and to make sure that his mother had a number to call him at, he hasn’t kept in touch with his dad. His dad made it clear to Andy before he left for this trip that he wanted nothing to do with him, and Andy had no interest in going against his wishes.

“What about Dad?” Andy said, looking behind him to see Allison sitting up on her elbows. 

“Andy, he’s dead. Oh God, it was horrible,” she said, her voice quivering over the phone. “Mom found him in the driveway. He didn’t come home tonight and she was gonna go out and look for him. Oh God.”

“Jesus,” he said. He ran his hand through his hair. “How’s Mom?”

“Hysterical,” Lucy said. “Or, she was hysterical before they sedated her.”

“Fuck,” Andy said, dragging his hand down the side of his face. “Did you call James and M.J. yet?”

“No,” Lucy said. “I will.”

“No, I’ll do it,” he said. His sister is only eighteen and Andy didn’t want to put the pressure to deliver the terrible news two more times. “I’ll catch the next flight out.”

“Thank you, Andy,” Lucy said. “I know that you and Dad weren’t on good terms-”

“Lucy, it’s okay. Go check on Mom,” he said. 

“Alright, see you soon,” Lucy said before hanging up. 

Andy dropped the phone into the cradle before looking over at where Allison was sitting. “My dad’s dead,” he said.

“Are you okay?” Allison asked as she pushed aside the covers and made her way over to him.

“Yes,” he said, letting her take hold of his hand but not meeting her eyes. “I have to call my brothers.”

“Okay,” she said and he looked up at her.

“I have to go home,” he said. He fully expected her to stay behind, assuming that she wouldn’t want to go back to Shermer.

“Of course,” Allison said.

“There’s still two weeks left on our lease for this place.”

“Andy, it’s okay. They will understand,” she said, an exasperated look on her face. 

“No, I mean,” he said, squeezing her fingers lightly. “You can stay here for two more weeks.”

“Stay?” Allison asked. “I’m not staying here without you while you go bury your father. Are you serious?”

Her cheeks reddened as she watched him. “I just didn’t want to assume.”

“Please assume,” she said, basically pleading. “Please assume that I’m never going to let you leave me behind, especially for something like this. I mean, we’re engaged to be married, Andy.”

He was able to smile just a little bit then, running his thumb over her knuckles. “Okay. Sorry.”

“Don’t apologize,” she said. “Call your brothers. I’ll start packing.”

“Thank you,” he said, leaning in to kiss her briefly. 

“Go call them,” she said, taking her hand back and moving out of the bedroom.

Andy took a deep breath and dialed his brother’s number, feeling a weird sensation of emptiness.

~~

Brian is reading the newspaper when the doorbell rings. Laurie, who is working on her laptop at the kitchen table, jumps up to get the door. He hears the door open and then Laurie is saying, “Brian, come here please.”

Something in her voice makes him move quickly. His first thought is that something is wrong, but he steps behind Laurie and sees Allison. At first, he isn’t sure if it’s her, but she smiles when she sees him as Laurie steps aside. 

“You didn’t call,” Brian chokes out. “I didn’t know you were coming.”

“It was a last minute thing,” Allison says. “Andy had to come home for his dad’s funeral.”

Brian lets out a breath, both of relief and sadness for Andy. When he saw Allison standing there without Andy, he was worried that something had happened between them again. He’s relieved that they’re fine, but he knows how complicated Andy’s relationship with his father has always been.

“That’s horrible,” Laurie says when Brian says nothing. “I’m sorry.”

Allison shrugs. “Thanks, I’m sure Andy would appreciate it.”

“Do you want to come in?” Brian asks.

Instead of responding, Allison reaches forward and wraps Brain in a hug. He brings his arms around her and pulls her close, closing his eyes. He was 23 the last time he saw her, so much younger than he is now. Five years have passed and he’s engaged, about to start his own business with Laurie. 

“I missed you,” Allison says, pulling back. “I missed you too, Laurie, but I don’t know if you’d want a hug from me.”

“Sure I do,” Laurie says, accepting a quick hug. Brian notes that Allison from five years ago wasn’t a hugger. He wonders if her time in Italy had anything to do with it. 

“To answer your question, I would love to come in, but Claire, Bender, and Andy are all on their way to Al’s and I’ve come to invite you,” she says. 

“That sounds great,” Brian says. He misses going to Al’s with his friends, hanging out and talking like old times.

Allison smiles and nods. “Good. I’ll drive.”

~~

Bender holds a squirming Owen in his lap while he waits for the waiter to bring over a high chair. Meanwhile, Lily is talking Andy’s ear off, asking about everything she can think of while Claire tries, unsuccessfully, to get her to sit still.

Andy takes it in stride, answering every question with care. He must catch on that Lily likes to be taken seriously, because he doesn’t talk down to her. 

“Was flying in a plane scary?” She asks, letting Claire fiddle with her hair. Bender wonders why Claire even bothers, since Lily will pull at the clips as soon as Claire isn’t looking.

“A little at first, but you get used to it,” Andy says. 

“Mommy, can we go on a plane?” Lily asks as Claire lets go of her hair, seemingly satisfied enough with how it looks.

“Maybe someday,” Claire says. 

Bender can tell that Lily is about to start begging him, but he is rescued by the waiter coming with the high chair. Owen resists, keeping his legs extended straight, and he giggles when Bender manages to force him into the chair.

He ruffles his son’s red hair before sitting back down. He barely has time to breathe before Allison, Brian, and Laurie arrive. There’s a cacophony of greetings, Lily jumping up to hug Laurie and Brian while Allison slides into the chair next to Andy. 

Once everyone is settled and the waiter delivers their drinks, Bender raises his glass. “To us,” he says, which earns him a smile from Claire and an eye roll from Allison. 

“To us,” Andy responds, lifting his glass as well. Soon enough, everyone is holding up their glass with the exception of Owen, who holds up a crayon instead. 

When it’s all done and their food comes out, Bender nudges his leg against Claire’s. She pushes back with a smile.

~~

Laurie checks her watch for the third time in as many minutes before scanning the restaurant again. This morning, her and Brian, along with the rest of the group, went to Andy’s father’s funeral. Brian is still with him now, Laurie leaving the so-called “Breakfast Club” to support Andy in a way only they can.

Finally, she sees her approach. She slides into the seat across from Laurie and lets her bag slide off her shoulder to the floor. “Hey, sorry I’m late. Mom came back late from the store and I needed the car.”

“Don’t worry about it,” Laurie says. “I could have picked you up.”

“I know, but Mom wants me to get used to driving on the highway before I go to college,” Molly says. Much to Brian’s annoyance, Laurie gets along quite well with his seventeen year old sister. They get lunch frequently, both with and without Brian. 

“And how did it go?” Laurie asks as she looks down at the menu. Claire told her that the restaurant has a good salad, but Laurie is leaning towards the flatbread.

“I only got beeped at once,” Molly says, beaming.

“That’s good, I guess,” Laurie laughs and shakes her head.

“It’s better than last time,” Molly shrugs. “What are you going to get?”

Laurie is grateful that Brian’s family likes her so much. At first, his mother wasn’t thrilled with the fact that they moved in with each other before getting married, but Brian convinced her that it was a convenience to live together while they were starting a business together. It’s been years since then and their business is just getting off the ground, but his mother hasn’t voiced any further concerns.

She wishes her family felt the same about Brian, wishes that they could see how happy she is and be happy for her. Her mom loves him, but her dad is still waiting for the day that she comes home without the engagement ring on her finger. Every once in a while, her mom reassures her in Spanish about how “mother knows best” and that if Laurie is happy, she should ignore her dad and live her life. 

Brian was surprised to learn that Laurie is half-Mexican and fluent in Spanish. Apparently, most of Shermer High had no idea. She remembers that when she first met Olivia, she offered protection from people who would bully her for not looking like everyone else in Shermer. She didn’t know it at the time, but she had accepted a deal with the devil and became a bully herself. 

She shakes her head and breaks out of her thought spiral. “I’m going to get the flatbread, I think.”

“That looks good,” Molly says. “I think I’ll get the same.”

Yes, Laurie is grateful for her mom and for Brian’s family. Molly has become a close friend and reminds her much of herself at seventeen. 

Once the waitress takes their orders, Molly clasps her hands and rests them on the table. “So,” she says, “how is my idiot brother.”

Laurie rolls her eyes. “He’s fine,” she says. “He’s at a funeral right now.”

“Right, Lucy Clark’s dad. I heard about that,” Molly says. “That’s sad.”

“It is,” Laurie says. She picks up her water glass and takes a sip. When she places the glass back down on the table, she looks up and sees Molly staring at her. “What?”

“I’m going to be transparent here,” Molly says. “I’ve been sent here to ask you a question.”

“Sent here?” Laurie asks, furrowing her brow. “What question?”

“Mom wants to know if you’ve set a date yet,” Molly says, a conspiratorial smile taking over her face.

Laurie lets out a laugh. She was expecting something worse than that, but the answer to the question was supposed to remain secret until the invitations were sent out. “Of course she does,” she says. “Tell her to keep an eye on the mail.”

Molly smiles even wider. “I will. I expect to have a part in your wedding.”

“My lips are sealed,” Laurie says, but offers her a smile.

“Laurie!” Molly exclaims. “Come on.”

“I’ll tell you soon, I promise,” Laurie says. 

“Fine,” Molly says. Luckily, the waitress returns with their food before Molly can interrogate her some more. 

~~

Allison is lying on the bed in their hotel room, leafing through a newspaper and waiting for Andy to get out of the shower. He’s been in there longer than he usually takes, but she assumes he’s just processing the events of the day.

Andy spent most of the funeral and the following reception looking after his mother and younger sister. Lucy can hold her own most of the time, but she’s traumatized by the entire event. Andy’s mother is a wreck and had to be medicated for most of the afternoon. 

Andy’s brother James is married with a family of his own, so he spent the funeral comforting his young kids who had just lost their grandfather and didn’t understand. His other brother, M.J., helped Andy prop their mother up for most of the day.

She hears the water shut off as she circles the bottom of the newspaper with a marker. She flips it closed and waits for him to emerge from the bathroom. A few seconds later he does, a towel wrapped around his waist and his hair glistening wet. 

“What are you looking at?” Andy asks, motioning towards the newspaper. 

“Oh, just flipping through,” she says. “How are you?”

“I’m okay,” he says. “I’m glad it’s over.” 

Allison pushes herself up to sitting and pats on the bed next to her. Andy sits down next to her and presses the heels of his hands into his eyes. He looks exhausted, more tired than she’s ever seen him, and she doesn’t know what to do to make him better. She does what she can and gently rubs his bare back with her fingers. 

“We should go over there for dinner tonight,” he says. “People dropped stuff off, but I want to make sure she eats.”

“Alright,” she says, leaning her chin against his shoulder. 

“Is it bad that I’m relieved?” Andy asks. 

“What do you mean?” Allison asks, although she’s pretty sure she knows what he’s talking about.

“He’s not a good man. Lucy told me he was yelling at Mom a lot more towards the end. Is it bad that I’m relieved that she’s free of him now?” Andy asks, not moving his hands from his face. 

“No,” she says. “I think it’s perfectly understandable.” 

“God, this is the worst feeling,” he says, pressing even harder into his face.

“Stop,” Allison reaches out and wraps her hand around his wrist. She pulls his hands away from his face and threads her fingers through his. “It’s alright to feel what you’re feeling. Of course it is.”

He groans and shakes the hair out of his face. He let it grow out in Europe and now the strands sit across his forehead. Allison leans over and presses a kiss to his cheek before climbing off the bed. 

“I’ll get ready so we can go over to your mom’s, okay?” She says and he nods before grabbing her wrist and pulling her down to kiss him. 

When he lets go of her hand, she grabs a pair of clean clothes from their suitcase and heads into the bathroom. She lets the sting of the hot water distract her from her anxiety. Allison knows Andy will be okay, but that doesn’t mean it won’t be bumpy until he gets there. She has an idea that may help, but she doesn’t want to run it by him until he has processed these recent events a little more. 

As soon as she’s clean, she turns the shower off, dries off, and gets dressed. She brushes through her hair, quickly because she hates doing it, and goes back out to the main room. Andy is dressed now, wearing a more casual outfit than he was wearing earlier, and is leaning over the bed with his back to her. 

“Are you okay?” She asks again, not for the first time today.

He turns around and holds the newspaper that she was looking at earlier up in front of him. “What’s this?”

He’s pointing at the circles she drew around apartments near Shermer. She probably shouldn’t have left him alone with it, but she thought he was so lost in his head that he wouldn’t have noticed it. 

“A newspaper,” she says, unhelpfully.

“Allie,” he says. “Come on.”

“I just thought,” she starts. “Okay, I was just thinking that it might be good for us to stay here for a while. You could stay near your mom and we could be here for Shermer High’s reunion. I was just looking, I obviously wasn’t going to do anything without talking to you.”

“You want to stay?” Andy asks.

“I don’t know if you looked, but there’s a few where the lease is only a year. I turned in my final draft a month ago and it should be published soon enough. There are plenty of law firms around here that would want you, even on a short term basis. But if you don’t want to, then we will figure it out,” she says, talking so fast she almost trips on her tongue.

For a second, Andy just stares at her. She feels herself flush under his stare but she maintains eye contact. “What-” he starts. “You want to stay _here_?” 

“Yes Andy, I want to stay here _with you_. Is that okay?”

He drops the newspaper and reaches out to grab her hands. “Yes, it’s okay. I’m just surprised.”

“So, we’re doing this?” Allison asks, squeezing his hands.

“Okay,” he says. “Yeah. We’re doing this.”

~~

Claire flops down on the mattress and throws her arm over her forehead. It’s been a long day, with the funeral and reception that followed, and it took an abnormally long time for her to get Owen to go to bed. John isn’t in the bathroom or in their bed, so she assumes that he’s having just as hard of a time with Lily. 

Their strategy since having Owen has been to divide and conquer, saying goodnight to one kid and putting the other in bed. As if she willed it, she hears Lily’s bedroom door open and her husband’s hushed voice before the door clicks closed. Soon enough, Bender falls back onto the mattress next to her.

“I wouldn’t be surprised if one of them ends up in bed with us tonight,” Claire says, looking over at her husband.

“I think it’ll be like that until things quiet down again,” Bender says. 

“Still happy we did this?” Claire asks.

“Did what? Settled down?” Bender says, laughter in his voice. “Ask me when I’ve gotten more than three hours of sleep.”

“That might be a few years from now,” Claire says, moving her head closer to his.

Bender hums, his eyes closed. “Yes, I am,” he says, answering her earlier question. “But sometimes I wonder what my life would be like if my daughter asked 5% less questions every day.”

Claire laughs at that before leaning over and kissing his cheek. She pushes herself up until she’s sitting on the edge of the bed. “She’s going to be so smart,” she says. “She’ll outsmart both of us someday.”

“Good,” Bender says, opening one eye to look at her. “I’m going to fall asleep.”

“At least get under the covers,” she says. “You were smart to get ready before bedtime. Now you can just go straight to sleep.”

Bender hums again but doesn’t move. Claire rolls her eyes before goes to brush her teeth and change. When she comes back into the bedroom, she sees Bender predictably asleep. She crawls under the covers on her side of the bed and shoves his shoulder. 

“Under the covers,” Claire says when he opens his eyes a touch. 

Bender groans and slides up until he’s able to kick himself under the covers. Once he’s comfortable, he turns on his side and whispers, “Good night. I love you.”

“I love you too,” Claire whispers back before closing her eyes and slipping quickly into sleep. 

It couldn’t have been five minutes later when Claire hears the door to their bedroom creak open. “Mommy?” 

“Yes, baby?” Claire opens her eyes and tries to see in the dark.

“It’s dark in my room,” Lily says, holding tight to the Barbie she never lets go of and can’t sleep without. 

“Did Daddy put your nightlight on?” She asks and feels John stir beside her. 

“It’s still too dark,” she says. 

Claire sighs quietly before patting the bed between her and John with her hand. Lily takes the permission and jumps into the bed between them. 

“Please try to sleep,” Claire says, even though she knows all hope is lost.

In response, Lily presses her cold feet against her back. Claire doesn’t even want to know what position she has herself in to be able to do that. She remembers her mother’s words and tries to treasure them. _They are only this little once. Enjoy it._

~~

“Bender, someone’s here asking for you,” his friend and business owner Will says. 

Bender slides out from under the car he’s working on. “Not Claire?” He asks, raising his brow. Claire is the only one who ever comes to visit him at work and Will has been known to play coy.

“Nope, I have no idea who she is,” Will says, shrugging and pointing behind him before heading back to his office.

Bender stands up and brushes his hands over his overalls. It’s rare that someone would ask specifically for him, but usually it means that they aren’t happy with their service. Bender barely slept last night thanks to Lily, so he doesn’t know if he has the patience to deal with an unhappy customer.

“Hi, can I help you?” He asks as he rounds the corner, trying to quell his curiosity and keep his patience at the same time.

“My God, it’s really you,” the woman says, and there’s something familiar about her to him, but he can’t place her.

“I’m sorry, do you need assistance with something?” He’s got his business voice on, something that Claire teases him about from time to time. 

“I always thought you’d grow up to look just like him, but you didn’t. You look just like my mother,” she says and Bender feels the blood rush from his head.

“Mom?” He asks, feeling his heart race in his chest.

~~

He gets her into his office and she immediately starts turning around his picture frames that sit on his desk.

“Who are these people?” She asks, sliding her finger against the frame. 

“My friends,” he says, watching as she grabs another frame, this one home to a picture of Claire. “And my wife.”

“You’re married?” His mother says, smiling. “That’s wonderful.” She reaches to grab another.

“Listen,” he starts, but she stops him as she holds the picture up.

“Are these your children?” She asks. 

“Yes,” he says through gritted teeth.

“Amazing,” she says, tracing Lily’s face with her finger. “Children are a blessing.”

“Are they,” he says, crossing his arms over his chest. 

She looks up at him then. “John, there’s so much that you don’t know.”

“Really? Try me,” he says. He feels the anger bubbling under the surface, so he walks around to the other side of his desk and sits in his chair. His mother mirrors him and sits down in the chair reserved mostly for customers who come in to negotiate prices of services. She places the frames back where they go, but Bender reaches out and straightens them anyway.

“Your father was not a good man,” his mother says. “He was rotten until the day he died, I’m sure.”

“You know he’s dead, then,” he says.

“I just found out. I was looking for you,” she says. “I saw your business in the newspaper, I saw the name. I had to find out if it was you.”

“Well, it’s me. What do you want?” He asks.

“I wanted to see you,” she says. The longer he looks at her, the more familiar she looks. He thought he didn’t remember anything about her since she left when he was so young, but he realizes that it’s not true. The crinkle by her eyes when she smiles is so familiar that it makes him feel sick.

“You’ve seen me,” Bender says. “Let me show you out.”

“Wait,” she says, raising her hand to stop him from standing up. “He hurt me.”

“I know,” he ground out through gritted teeth as he sinks back into the seat.

“He hurt me and he always said that he was going to stop, that he was going to try harder, but he never did,” she says. He doesn’t know why she thinks she’s telling him anything he doesn’t already know. “He was going to kill me. I had to get out.”

“Why didn’t you take me with you?” He asks, angry at how vulnerable he sounds.

“Oh honey, I wanted to. Believe me,” she says. “But I couldn’t. I could barely walk after the last time. My friend from work offered to get me out and I took it.”

“You left me behind,” he says, using every muscle in his body to prevent himself from yelling. 

“You were your father’s pride and joy. He would never hurt a hair on your head. I knew you’d be safe,” she says and he can’t help but laugh.

“As it turns out, that’s not true,” Bender says. He doesn’t even remember when it started, but he was young. He was definitely still in elementary school.

“What do you mean?” She asks.

“Did you think that he spared me? All those years alone with him?” Bender asks, demands. He never thought he’d have this conversation and he didn’t want it, but at least he’s getting some answers.

“He hurt you,” she says and it isn’t a question.

“Of course he did. I can’t believe you thought he wouldn’t.”

“Rotten,” she says, shaking her head. “Rotten to the core. Until the day he died.”

He can’t disagree with her there, so he shrugs. “Yeah, he was.”

“I’m sorry,” she says and he can see her shaking. “I’m so sorry.”

He has wanted someone responsible for his childhood to apologize for it for years. His father, his mother, his teachers who never noticed the bruises, Vernon. Claire apologized more than anyone else and she’s one of the only people who was interested in saving him. But with this shaking woman sitting in front of him begging for forgiveness, he finds that it doesn’t feel as good as he thought it would.

“Stop,” he says. 

“I didn’t know,” his mother says. “I swear.”

“Please stop,” he says again. “I don’t need to hear it. We both got out.”

“You got out,” she repeats. “You did. We outlived the bastard.”

“Sure,” he says. He looks down at her trembling hands again. “You still wear your wedding ring.”

His mother looks down at her hands and closes her fist. “It’s not his ring. I’ve remarried.”

Bender feels another wave over anger come over him, but he keeps it in. He refused to let himself think about his mother for so many years but if he had, it would have been reasonable to assume that she remarried. “Oh?” He asks.

“He’s a good man. He treats me well and loves our kids,” she says. _Kids_ , he thinks. He’s almost 28 years old and he’s just finding out that his mother has an entire second family. He digs his nails into the palm of his hand.

“Okay,” he says, not sure what else he could say.

“I completely understand if you don’t want anything to do with me,” she says, “but I would like to be a part of your life. I want you to meet your half-siblings.”

The idea of meeting the kids who got lucky makes him feel like he might throw up, but he manages to keep it in. 

“I want to meet your wife and your kids. They look lovely,” she says. She doesn’t wait for him to respond, instead standing and placing a piece of paper on his desk. When he looks down at it, he sees a phone number scribbled on it. “I never stopped loving you,” she says. “Please know that.”

She leaves the door open on her way out.

He doesn’t know how long he sits there before Will interrupts his thoughts. “Everything okay?”

He curses under his breath before slipping the piece of paper into his jumpsuit pocket. “All good. Let’s get back to work.”

“Alright,” Will says and John can tell that he doesn’t believe him. One good thing about his business partner is that he won’t ask any further questions. 

He slides under a car and starts tinkering away, but his head is elsewhere.

~~

Claire is just about to call the garage and inquire about John’s whereabouts when she hears the front door open and shut. 

The kids have long been put to bed and Claire’s been reading a book she picked up at the library, but she’s been worried about her husband’s absence. She tucks a photograph of Lily between the pages she’s reading and slides out of bed.

She expected him to stop in the kitchen for some leftover dinner, but she hears him walking up the stairs. She stands and waits for him to open the bedroom door.

When he does, she sees the face of an exhausted man who looks like he’s had the longest day of his life.

“John,” she whispers, “what happened?”

Instead of responding, he wraps his arms around her middle, pulls her close, and buries his face in her neck. 

She wraps her fingers in the hair on the back of his neck and rubs his back with her free hand. Something bad must have happened at work.

Claire waits until she feels his arms loosen around her before pulling back. He looks tired but also angry, a storm behind his brown eyes. “Love,” she says, brushing his hair out of his face. 

“My mother is back in town,” he spits out.

Claire would have been less surprised if he said anything else. “Your mother? But I thought she was...” Claire doesn’t know what she thought she was, if she’s honest. Dead? Non-existent? She doesn’t know.

“She saw an ad for the garage in the newspaper.”

Claire watches him as fury dances across his features. Although he looks more pissed off than she’s ever seen him, his hands rest gently on her hips.

“She had the _audacity_ to stop by my business, tell me that her new husband and children are in town, and say that she wants us all to meet. After she left me with that man, knowing what he was capable of.” He shakes in her arms and grits his teeth. “She had the audacity to make me feel bad for her.”

Claire pulls him close again, his chin falling to her shoulder. Claire doesn’t think she can say anything to make him feel better, doesn’t think that the words even exist, so she just rubs his back until the shaking stops.

She remembers what John was like when his father died during their senior year of high school. He was quiet, so quiet that it became concerning. She remembers him climbing through her bedroom window unannounced, climbing into her bed, and holding her all night. 

At the time, back in the early days of their relationship, she was worried that he was going to be permanently affected by it, worried that he would never be okay again. He was then, and she knows will be again now. 

“Why don’t you take a nice warm shower and get into bed,” Claire says. “It’s a Friday, let’s sleep in tomorrow.”

“If the kids will let us,” he mumbles under his breath. “She wants to meet the kids,” he says, his eyes flaring.

“We don’t have to have anything to do with her, if that’s what you want,” she says. “You can decide what you want to do later. But we can’t do anything about it now. Shower.”

“Join me?” He asks, a small semblance of a smile on his face. 

“If you want me to,” she says, smiling back.

“Oh, I always want you.”

Later, after spending a warm shower up in his arms with her legs wrapped around him, she watches him succumb to sleep.

~~

Brian is pacing back and forth in their living room, waiting for Laurie to pull into the driveway. He just got off of a conference call with his new employees, getting ready for launch day. Laurie, who works more on the coding side of things rather than the administrative, skipped out and went to pick Larry up from the airport. 

As promised, Brian visited Larry Lester and vice versa over the years. Visits got less and less frequent, especially after Larry’s parents moved out of the state and Larry’s first child was born. Now though, Larry has a business trip in the city and Brian offered up their apartment as a place to stay.

Anne and Stubby, or David as he’s called now, are coming over for dinner. Overall, he’s nervous about the amount of people that he doesn’t see very often coming over for dinner. 

He sees the headlights and then hears the car door shut, so he goes to be useful and help carry Larry’s bags in. He opens the front door and is about to slip his shoes on, but Larry is already standing on the other side of the doorway with his suitcase in hand.

“Larry,” he says, smiling and stepping aside to let him and Laurie in.

“Bri,” he says, giving him a quick handshake before moving into the kitchen.

Laurie and Larry have formed a weird, mutual understanding over the years. They like each other well enough and they get along great when they’re together, but Brian can still sometimes feel the tension left over from high school days.

Something that was very unexpected was the friendship forged between Anne and Laurie. Anne and Stubby stayed close to Shermer even after Anne’s parents moved away. Laurie and Brian attended their wedding and they are set to be the godparents of their first child. Anne and Laurie had plenty of conversations about the past that Brian was not privy to, but the two of them are thick as thieves these days.

Brian takes the suitcase from Larry and sets it down in the spare bedroom. Their apartment is big but isn’t in a great area, so they ended up getting a bargain.

In the time it takes him to walk from the spare room to the kitchen, Anne and Stubby have arrived and are standing in the kitchen next to Laurie and Larry. 

“Hello,” he says in greeting, giving Anne a quick hug and Stubby a handshake. 

“Hey, Bri,” Stubby says. Another weird development over the last few years is the tolerance/borderline friendship between himself and Stubby. 

“Ready to eat?” He asks and when he’s met with enthusiasm, he smiles. “I’ll get to work then.”

~~

Laurie lies on her side, her legs tangled in Brian’s as she watches him sleep. There was a time, back when they first started looking into starting their own business, when Brian barely slept at all. He was razor-thin focused on everything, he refused to take breaks, and he became distant, so distant that she began to worry about the future of their relationship. 

She became desperate after weeks of this, weeks where she went to bed without him and where he was barely touching her. She reached out to Claire, intending only to vent, but she ended up coming over with Bender under the rouse of something she can’t remember and staging somewhat of an intervention.

After they left, Brian sat her down and told her about the time he brought a gun to school their senior year of high school.

Laurie knows him better now than she did then and she can tell when he’s working himself too hard. He knows her better too, and can tell when she’s too stuck in her head. She’s never known anyone like him.

She loves him so much, more than she ever thought she could love anyone. 

Back in high school, she initially thought he was a weird dork that Claire somehow ended up being friends with. After a while, especially after she reconciled with Claire, she realized that she found him cute. 

Olivia could tell right away. It’s one of her superpowers, being able to tell attraction from one shared look. Laurie remembers one party right before graduation where Olivia got her drunk, forced her to admit it, and made fun of her in front of her friends. The one positive about the whole situation was that Olivia, Jerry, and Ben were terrified of John Bender and didn’t dare cross him or anyone he cared about, so Brian got spared any retaliatory bullying.

After they hooked up after Claire and Bender’s wedding, Brian told her that the meal she made him in the home ec classroom senior year meant as much to him as it did to her. She counts her blessings that she was able to find him again, five years later. 

Sometimes, when she’s too stuck in her head, she wonders if she deserves forgiveness from anyone she’s hurt. Anne Lester, one of her best friends now, was brutally bullied by Olivia and Laurie just stood by and let it happen. She had her reasons, but none of them were good enough to justify what she let happen. 

She stood by while Olivia harassed Allison too, someone Laurie cares for quite a bit now as well. She called Brian a dork to his face once, before Bender threatened her old friends with a switchblade. The guilt washes over her when she thinks about it too much or for too long.

But just like she takes care of him, Brian takes care of her. He can tell when she gets that glazed-over look in her eye and he always knows what to do and say. 

She watches him as he shifts slightly in his sleep. One thing she discovered early in their relationship is that Brian talks in his sleep. He mutters incoherent sentences under his breath and the first time that it happened, Laurie laughed so hard it woke him up.

 _I’m going to marry this man_ , she thinks as she presses the side of her face into her pillow. Even though her father doesn’t like him, she’s going to marry Brian. 

He’s the best thing that’s ever happened to her and she’s made it her mission in life to try to make him as happy as he makes her.

She gently, so she doesn’t wake him, places her arm over his middle. In his sleep, he grabs her hand and pulls her close. 

~~

Andy’s mom sets a plate in front of him before sitting across from him at the table. It’s been a week since he buried his dad and she buried her husband, and they’re sitting in the kitchen eating pity lasagna. 

Allison had a call with her publisher, something about the launch of her new book, so Andy decided to go to his mother’s house. James and M.J. went back at their respective homes and Lucy was in school, and Andy didn’t want his mother to be alone with her grief. 

“Mrs. Hammond really cannot cook,” his mom says, poking the food with her fork. 

“It’s not that bad,” Andy says, shoveling a forkful into his mouth.

“Andy, you still don’t have a refined palate, even after all that time in Italy,” she teases, a smile on her lips.

He’s so glad to see her smile, so even though she’s making fun of him, he smiles back. “Food is food, even in Italy,” he says, knowing that Allison would smack him if she was sitting next to him. Not like she can judge, based on what he saw her eat when they were still in high school.

“I’m not sure your girlfriend would agree with you,” his mother says, saying what he’s thinking. “Sorry, fiancée.” His mom gave him a hard time about that one, as did everyone else, since they didn’t tell anyone. The only reason he didn’t was because it was so new and he wanted it to be _theirs_ for a while. 

“Sorry, Mom,” he says, not for the first time since he’s been home.

“I’m excited to read Allison’s next book,” his mom remarks, and while Andy knows that his mom reads and enjoys Allie’s books, he can’t help but feel like she’s ramping up to something.

“Me too,” he says. He had read her books without knowing they were hers back when they were broken up and read them again when they got back together. They comforted him when he felt lost and stitched him back together when Allison came back.

“Are you staying around until the release?” She asks. Andy smiles a small smile, realizing that this is what his mom wanted to know.

“We are going to stick around a bit longer than that, I think,” Andy says.

“How long is a bit?” His mom asks. 

“About a year, I think,” Andy says. When his mom gasps dramatically, Andy rolls his eyes. “It makes sense to stick around for a bit. We’re going to get married eventually and we want everyone there.”

“You’ve just made me so happy,” his mom says. Andy didn’t realize that his mom had missed him that much, but the tears pooling in her eyes proves it.

“I’m glad,” he says, taking another bite of the apparently sub-par lasagna. 

“Promise me that you aren’t staying because of me,” she says.

“Mom,” Andy begins to protest but she lifts her to stop him. 

“I can take care of myself.”

“I know you can,” Andy says. “I know you can. But I want to help.”

“Your father loved you,” his mother bursts out and it makes Andy flinch. “He did. I know you don’t believe it.”

“Mom,” he says as he lays his fork down on his plate.

“I know he wasn’t always good, but he loved you. He loved me too,” she says, her chin wobbling. To Andy, it sounds like she’s trying to convince herself that what she’s saying is true. Because she’s grieving, he lets her.

“I know, Mom,” he says, reaching over to take her hand.

“I miss him,” she says, and then she starts crying. “And I know I shouldn’t.”

Andy stands and is immediately at his mother’s side. He lets her wrap her arms around his middle and she presses her face into his stomach. After everything that his dad put his mom through, after everything that’s happened, this is the first time Andy has ever seen his mother cry.

They stay like this for a while, Andy’s mom clinging to Andy while she cries quietly. He doesn’t know how much time has passed, but eventually the front door opens and Lucy steps through, back from school. 

His mother looks up and when she sees her daughter standing there, she pushes Andy away and wipes her eyes. Andy watches as seconds pass and she puts herself back together like an expert. He wonders how many times she’s had to do that to be so good at it. 

“Is everything alright?” Lucy asks, dropping her backpack on the floor.

“Perfectly fine, my dear,” his mother says before pushing her chair back and standing up. “There’s lasagna in the kitchen. Have some if you’d like.” She then moves swiftly up the staircase and disappeared.

“What the fuck was that all about?” Lucy asks, looking at where his mother just disappeared.

“Don’t swear,” Andy says as an impulse. He picks up the plates and brings them to the sink. “She’s got a lot going on.”

“Don’t we all,” his sister says, following him into the kitchen. She takes a fork out of the drawer and takes a bite of the lasagna. “Oh, that’s disgusting.”

“Seriously?” Andy asks after he places the plates in the sink. “Is it really that bad?”

“Didn’t you have some?” She asks, throwing her fork in the sink as well.

“Shut up,” Andy says, leaning against the counter. 

“Is Mom okay?” Lucy asks. 

Andy shrugs. “No,” he says. “But she will be.”

“She keeps pretending to hold it together,” Lucy says. 

“She’s trying to be a good mom,” Andy says. He knows because he’s seen it. He saw it his entire childhood, his mom keeping it together so her kids wouldn’t know that anything was wrong. 

“I just wish she would… I don’t know,” Lucy says and Andy knows how she feels. 

“Give her time,” Andy says. He leans over and lays his hand on her shoulder. Lucy was a daddy’s girl when she was little, Andy remembers. As much as his dad could love anyone, he loved her. Andy left for Europe when Lucy was thirteen, back when she was starting to stray from that role into an angsty teenager.

“Since when did you become an adult?” Lucy asks, brushing her hand off his shoulder with a smirk.

“I’m 28,” Andy says. “I’m practically 30. I’m getting married.”

“God, that’s gross,” Lucy says. “Are you going to make me an aunt again soon? James’ kids don’t like me.”

“To be fair, James’ kids don’t like anyone,” Andy says. Much like James himself, James’ kids keep to themselves. “And probably not anytime soon. It’s up to Allison.”

If he’s honest, Andy doesn’t know if Allison will ever want kids. Andy himself isn’t committed to the idea, he’s happy enough as he is, and he’d be happy to go along with anything Allison wants to do in that department. He hopes they’d be good parents.

“You’d be good parents,” Lucy says, as if she’s reading his thoughts. “But don’t have them if you’re not sure you want them.”

Andy wouldn’t dream of it, not after seeing what it’s done to Allison, to Brian, and to a lesser extent, to Claire. Allison would never compromise on something like that either, even if it was a make or break thing for him.

“When did you get so old?” Andy asks Lucy, earning him a punch in the arm.

“Shut up,” Lucy says. “I’ve got homework. Are you sticking around for a while?”

“Sure,” Andy says. “I gotta clean up in here and I’ll check on Mom, too.”

Lucy nods. “We missed you, you know,” she says before retreating up to her room.

Andy didn’t think that he’d be happy to come back to Shermer, but for now, he is. He grabs the sponge and starts scrubbing the dirty dishes.

~~

“She’s outside,” Claire says, Owen balanced on her hip as she runs her hand through his hair. “Pouting by the shed, I’m sure.”

“What about?” Bender asks, then presses a soft kiss to his wife’s lips. 

Owen reaches his arms out and says “Dada!” He repeats is over and over until Bender drops a kiss on his head too. 

“She’s upset that Owen wanted to play with his Star Wars action figure, I believe. I told her she needed to share, but...”

“But,” Bender agrees. Lily is at the ripe age of five and has been particularly crabby lately. “I’ll go check on her and then I’ll get started on dinner.”

He finds Lily right where Claire expected her to be, slumped over in front of the shed with her forehead pressed to her knees. “Hello, Peanut,” Bender says, and after weighing the risk and benefits of getting his jumpsuit even more dirty, he sits down next to her in the garden bed. “What’s going on?”

“I’m not talking to you,” she says, muffled because of her position.

“Me? What did I do?” He asks, pinching her leg lightly. She peeks out from under her arm before burying her face again.

“I’m not talking to anyone,” Lily says. “Momma is mean.”

“What did Momma do?” Bender asks. Having children has taught him patience, something he didn’t have an ounce of ten years ago.

“She took Luke away.”

The Luke Skywalker action figure was a gift to Owen from Uncle Brian, even though he’s a little too young for it. Owen loves the thing, but unfortunately so does Lily. 

“I’m sorry you’re upset, Peanut,” he says, “but Owen also gets to play with Luke.”

“You don’t understand!” Lily says, finally looking up at him. She’s been crying and she has dirt all over her face, two things that will have Claire distressed later. 

“Tell me what I don’t understand,” he says, rubbing a hand through her hair. She’s a mess and is going to need a bath anyway, so Bender doesn’t worry about his dirty hands messing up her hair.

“Barbie is going to miss him,” she says, her lip trembling. “She gets upset when he’s away for too long.”

Bender finds that his kids constantly surprise him. He doesn’t remember much from his childhood, Claire thinks that he must’ve blocked most of it out, but he can’t imagine himself ever being this innocent. 

“They’re married and all Owen does is drool on him,” Lily whines. “It’s not fair.”

He wasn’t expecting this to be the source of conflict, although maybe he should have. Lily has a very active imagination and it’s been known to get her in trouble. 

“That isn’t fair,” Bender says, “but Luke was Owen’s first, so it’s also not fair to take it away from him. What are we going to do about it?”

Lily furrows her brow as if she’s deep in thought. “You and momma could get Owen a new one.”

Bender laughs at that. “Maybe Santa will bring Owen a new one. But until then, you have to share. Okay, Peanut?”

Lily frowns for a second before nodding her head, as if this new plan is agreeable enough to her. 

“Okay, good,” Bender says before standing and brushing his pants off. He offers his daughter his hand and when she takes it, she pulls herself up with it. “Let’s get you washed up. Your uncles will be here soon.”

Patrick and Jimmy are visiting from Boston after Claire’s been begging them to come for almost three years. The last time they were here, they had just moved into their home, Lily was two, and Claire was pregnant with Owen. 

Lily doesn’t remember the visit but she likes to talk on the phone and Patrick and Jimmy are willing to listen. Claire insisted that they be a part of their kids’ lives and Bender had no objection, but Claire’s parents thought otherwise.

Claire’s father, who still hates John all these years later, has expressed how much he wishes Claire would cut her brother out, but Claire ignores him. Claire’s mother never says anything when it comes up, she just sits silently while Claire and her husband argue.

Peter Standish told John only a month ago that he had ruined Claire’s life by knocking her up and forcing her into marriage. John, having had ten years of practice, just laughed dryly and told him that he really didn’t know Claire at all if he thought that John, or anyone else for that matter, could force Claire to do anything.

It turns out that he thinks a similar thing about Jimmy, thinking that the man corrupting his good, all-American son into dropping out of medical school and becoming gay. Claire doesn’t put up with it anymore. She doesn’t exactly keep her parents from the children, but she’s made it clear to them that she would pick her brother over them every time.

Lily holds her arms up and John sighs but leans down to pick her up anyway. She wraps her arms around his neck and curls into his neck while he carries her inside. When he opens the back door, he puts her down.

“Time for a shower, okay?” Bender says. “No giving Mom a hard time.”

Lily scrunches her nose but nods before taking off upstairs. Bender walks into the kitchen where he finds Claire reading something for work and Owen sitting on the floor with a toy truck.

“What was her problem?” Claire asks without looking up.

“Luke and Barbie are married,” Bender says, coming up behind her and slipping an arm around her waist. “They can’t possibly be without each other.”

Claire turns her head to look at him. “Seriously?” She asks.

“Seriously,” Bender says before pressing a kiss to her cheek. “She’s getting in the shower.”

“Good,” Claire says as Bender lets go of her. “I’ll check on her in a few. You should shower too.”

“Are you saying I smell, Princess?” Bender asks which earns him an eye roll from his wife.

“You are covered in grease and dirt. Don’t argue,” she says.

Bender knows better than to try, so he climbs the stairs to his bedroom.

~~  
Patrick and Jimmy arrive shortly after John gets out of the shower. He’s watching Owen eat and Claire is braiding Lily’s hair when the doorbell rings. Lily jumps up as Claire ties the last loop around her hair. 

“I’ll get it,” Lily says. 

“Of course,” Claire says, shooting Bender a look of exasperation. No matter how many times she tells Lily not to answer the door unless she know who it is, it doesn’t stick. “But only because you know it’s your uncles.”

Bender shakes his head as she heads into the entry way, knowing as well as she does that it’ll never work. 

Lily reaches up and pulls the door open. Claire feels her face break into a smile. “Hello,” her daughter says, looking up at Patrick and Jimmy. 

“Hello, Lily,” Patrick says. He smiles down at the girl before looking up at his sister. 

“It’s good to see you again,” Jimmy says. 

Lily turns around says, “Please come in.” Patrick raises his eyebrows as Claire shakes her head.

“She’s got good manners,” Patrick says. He leans in and presses a kiss to Claire’s cheek. “It’s so nice to see you, Claire.”

“You too. I missed you guys,” Claire says, looking at Jimmy with a smile. “But yes, please come in.”

Claire leads them into the house. Bender is wiping Owen’s face with a napkin, but turns when he hears them.

“Hey,” Bender says, picking Owen up. “How was your flight?”

“Not bad,” Jimmy says. “Who’s this?”

“This is Owen,” Bender says and Owen buries his face in Bender’s neck. “He’s a little shy.”

“I can get you set up in the spare bedroom,” Claire says. “John’s going to cook dinner.”

“Oh really?” Patrick says, teasing. John rolls his eyes. 

“I’m not bad,” he says. 

“He’s actually very good at it,” Claire says. “Come on.”

She leads Patrick and Jimmy to the bedroom, where she’s already made up the guest bed. “You’ve done a lot with this place,” Patrick says looking around.

“Yes, well,” Claire says, motioning for them to set their bags in the corner of the room. “You know me.”

“How is everything here?” Jimmy asks. 

“Good,” she says. “Brian’s getting married to my friend from high school. Allison and Andy are back from their trip and they’re also engaged.”

“Wow,” Jimmy says. “Very exciting.”

“How are Mom and Dad?” Patrick asks and Claire’s heart breaks for him. 

“I think they’re okay. Mom is at least,” she says. “Dad doesn’t come by very often. He still hates John.”

“Really?” Patrick asks.

“They get into an argument every time Dad comes over,” she says. “I had to ask him to leave last time because John doesn’t like to argue in front of the kids but he looked like he was going to explode.”

“And Mom?”

Claire shrugs. “She loves the kids.”

Claire hears a shriek and a crash from downstairs. She rubs her hand over her forehead and says, “I’ve got to go rescue my husband from our children.”

“We’ll come,” Jimmy says, both of them following her out of the room and down the stairs. 

~~  
Anne remembers the days when she was first getting to know Laurie for Brian’s sake. Brian isn’t stupid, has never been stupid, so even though she was initially skeptical of his choice in partner, she made an effort. 

She hadn’t expected Laurie to make an effort right back. 

After Brian showed up at school with a whole new group of friends that included Andrew Clark, Anne watched her brother spiral. Brian hurt him and Anne knows that the fact that he didn’t choose Larry over his new friends stung for a while. 

Eventually everything worked out and Larry remains a close friend of Brian’s even after he moved. 

Anne didn’t feel the same kind of betrayal when she found out that Brian was dating Laurie Murphy. She had already spent some time with Claire Standish both when she was still in high school and after, so she wasn’t particularly hurt when Brian ended up dating one of her past tormentors. 

If it had been Olivia though, Anne would never have forgiven him. 

Anne remembers getting the phone call from Laurie. It was weird and awkward to hear the apology, and even weirder when Laurie invited her out to dinner, but she agreed. 

Anne learned very quickly that Laurie has this undying loyalty to her and that if she is on your side, she’ll stay glued to you for as long as you’ll have her. Anne thinks that for a while, she was stuck to Olivia and was happy to stay there as long as Olivia didn’t turn on her.

Laurie also has a compulsive need for everyone to like her. Anne was struck by it when she realized, as Laurie sat across from her that first dinner, that she was looking for Anne’s approval. After a few tentative months, Anne gave it.

Now, Anne considers Laurie one of her best friends in the entire world. It happened slowly over the years until Anne realized that Brian and Laurie took up a significant chunk of her heart. 

Of course, a large part of her heart also belongs to David.

She knew who he was at school, even though he was a year ahead of her. He was the cool, quiet sports guy who went by Stubby and who was friends with Andrew Clark and Anne didn’t know much else about him. 

She knew who he was in college, too. Still a year ahead of her, he didn’t know of her existence for the first year she was there. She saw him at a party once, back when she was a freshman and was trying something new, before he disappeared with a girl to find a bedroom. 

It wasn’t until she was a sophomore and he was a junior that he learned her name. She worked in the tutoring center on campus, helping kids understand physics and calculus. 

“Hi,” he said when he sat across from her. “I don’t understand this at all and I need to pass this class or I’ll get kicked off the team.”

He tossed his test in front of her and leaned back in his chair. She picked it up and recognized the formulas on the page. Her eyes flicked to the score on the top of the page before she looked up at him. 

“Okay,” she said. “I’m Anne.”

He had the decency to look a bit sheepish at that. “Sorry,” he said. “I’m-”

“Stubby,” she said. “I know.”

He raised his eyebrows at the name before squinting at her face. “Most people call me David now,” he said. “Did we go to high school together?”

“Yes,” she said. “I’m a year behind you, though.”

“What’s your last name, Anne?” He said, eyes twinkling with interest.

“Lester,” she said. Before he could think too hard about the name, she slid the test back over to him. “Let’s get started.”

She tutored him for the semester and was sad to see him go, but he passed physics and moved on. He didn’t leave their last meeting without giving her a dazzling parting smile, though.

She thought she had seen the last of him until two years later, when she was a senior manning a table at an alumni event.

“Hey,” he said and she recognized his voice. She shot her head up and locked eyes with him. She had always thought that his hair was brown, but in the light of the gymnasium, it had a red tint to it. 

“Hi,” she said back. He was smiling at her and she felt herself burn under his gaze.

“Raffle tickets?” He asked, looking down at the table. “What can I win?”

“Um,” she said, trying to remember the spiel she’d been giving to people all afternoon. “The grand prize is a court side seat with your name on it.”

“Wow,” he said. “Tickets are a dollar? Sounds like a bargain.”

“Uh, yeah,” Anne said, fiddling with the tickets. “I guess it is. I’m not really into sports.”

“Cool,” he said, reaching into his pocket and pulling out a dollar bill. He handed it to her while she passed him a ticket. “I remember you, you know.”

Anne furrowed her brow. “I would hope so. It hasn’t been that long since I saved your physics grade.”

“I meant from high school,” he said. “I remember you from high school. You went to prom with Andy’s friend.”

“I did,” she said. “Did you just figure this out?”

“No,” he said. “I figured it out after you told me your last name.”

“Oh,” she said. She couldn’t figure out why they were still talking or what he wanted from her. “Okay.”

“I’m sorry about your brother,” he said and Anne narrowed her eyes.

“My brother is fine,” she said. “That wasn’t even you, anyway.”

“I know,” he said. “Fuck, sorry. I don’t know how to talk to you.”

“What do you want to say?” she asked and she hoped. 

“I _want_ to ask you to dinner,” he said, “but I don’t know what you’ll say back.”

She felt herself blushing and she knew he was watching. At the time, she’d never dated anyone before. She’d never even been on a date, unless she counted prom, which she didn’t. 

“Um,” she said. “Yes.”

“Yes?” He asked, a smile taking over his features.

“Yes,” she said. “But you’ll have to wait until I’m done here.”

“Of course,” he said. “I’ll wait.”

And he did. She didn’t know where he went for the remaining two hours of the event, but he met her by the exit when people were filing out.

“Sorry you didn’t win,” she said. The seat went to someone else, an older alumni who had bought ten tickets from her earlier in the day.

“I wasn’t that invested,” he said. “Any preference on where we go to eat?”

She shook her head as he opened his car door for her. She slipped inside and wondered how she ended up there. 

He took her to a diner and listened to her talk. They talked until the diner closed and they were forced out. He insisted on walking her back to her dorm from the parking lot and she let him kiss her before she went inside. 

“Good night,” he whispered.

“Good night, David,” she whispered back. 

After that, they dated. It was nice and it was easy, for a while. She brought him to Brian’s apartment for dinner, he met her brother, and her parents liked him. Not a single issue crossed her mind until she was at his place one night, looking through his yearbook.

One thing she never understood about Shermer High was the administration’s blind acceptance of the party culture. Sure, kids got detention if they did anything on school grounds, but they let kids submit pictures to the yearbook from parties without question.

She was thumbing through it, surprised by how many pictures David made appearances in, when she saw it. It was a small picture, sitting innocently on the corner of the page. David looked more than buzzed, his eyes unfocused and grin a little too wide. Anne recognized Andy in the background and saw Claire’s signature red hair, but that wasn’t what made her heart fall to her stomach.

It was the girl under David’s arm and the lipstick smudged on his face. _Olivia_.

She didn’t know how long she stared at it, but she only broke her focus on it when David came into the bedroom from the bathroom. His hair was still wet from the shower and he was wearing gray sweatpants.

He took one look at her and paused. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” she said. “Really, it’s nothing.” 

“Don’t lie,” he said, sitting next to her on the bed and pulling the yearbook towards him. “Oh,” he said when he spotted it. “I-”

“I don’t need an explanation,” she said. “It was years ago and you didn’t know me yet. It’s just…”

David waited patiently and Anne was overcome with how well he knew her. It felt weird to know him then while she looked down at a picture of a version of him that she didn’t know at all.

“She tortured me,” Anne said. “Every day for years. Laurie and Claire did too, but Olivia was ruthless. She never gave me a break and she never apologized for any of it. She’s a horrible person.”

“I know,” he said. He didn’t though, not really. Not the endless nights where she couldn’t sleep because she was crying so hard, not the notebooks she had to replace because Olivia had stolen and vandalized them, not the things that Olivia said that still made her pause when she looked in the mirror. But he tried to understand, and she loved him for it.

“It’s just hard,” she said. David told her once that he thought he was in love with Olivia back in high school, but that he realized he was wrong when he started dating her. They were nice words, but they did nothing to make her feel better when she faced the picture. “To see you with her like that.”

“I’m sorry,” he said, reaching out to stroke her knee. 

“There’s nothing to be sorry for,” she said, looking at him and wiping her thumb across his brow. “It just feels gross.”

He pressed a kiss to her wrist before reaching over and throwing the yearbook off the bed. “I love you,” David said, pulling her close until she was lying down facing him. 

She married him four years later and now, she’s expecting their first child. _Life comes at you fast,_ Anne thinks as she comes out of her daydream and watches Laurie take a sip of her water.

“That’s the plan anyway,” Laurie says, responding to something David said that Anne hadn’t heard. 

“What does Bri think about that?” He asks as he places his hand on Anne’s thigh. 

“He’ll just have to deal with it, Stubby,” Laurie says, a smirk on her lips. Laurie is the only one who still calls David Stubby besides Andy. When David graduated high school, he left his old name behind with the rest of it. 

“Laur,” Anne says, “are you going to the reunion?”

Anne doesn’t know why she says it, but she’s been thinking about it. She knows that David wants to go but she also knows that he’ll never ask her. It’s not her graduating class so none of her friends will be there, but her past tormentor will be. 

Anne can tell that Laurie knows exactly what she’s thinking. “I think so,” she says. “Brian wants to go. I think the rest of his friends are going.”

Anne nods and Laurie watches her carefully. “Well, if you’re going-”

“We don’t have to go,” David says. “Or I can go by myself.”

“No,” Anne says. “I’ll go. I have a few weeks to prepare myself.”

“Don’t push yourself,” Laurie says. “I’m not looking forward to seeing her either. But you’ll have an entire team by your side. I’m sure Olivia won’t mess with you if you’re sitting at a table with John Bender.”

“John’s a softy and you know it,” Anne says with a smile. Anne hasn’t spent a lot of time with Brian’s friends from high school, but she’s seen John Bender with his children enough times to know that the bad boy from high school doesn’t exist anymore.

“We know that, but Olivia doesn’t,” Laurie says. 

Anne turns to look at David, who smiles at her. There’s a question in his eyes, a look of _are you sure?_ Anne just nods.

~~  
Andy is lying in bed reading over a case briefing when the phone rings. Allison is out with Claire and Laurie, Allison explaining briefly before she left that Claire needs a break from the kids and that Patrick and Jimmy are babysitting until Bender gets home from work. She kissed him on her way out and he’s been hanging out by himself since then. 

He drops the packet of papers and leans over, grasping the phone with his fingers. He barely manages to grab it before he pulls it out of the cradle and brings it to his ear. 

“Hello?” He says into the receiver, looking down at the stack of papers. He has a lot of work to do for his new job and he’s barely made a dent in it.

“Oh,” the person on the other side says. “I thought… Is this Allison Reynolds’ phone number?”

Andy furrows his brow. The only person who calls here that doesn’t also know he lives here is Allison’s literary agent, but Allison’s agent is a man and the voice on the phone is a woman. “It is,” he says, unable to keep the apprehension out of his voice. “She’s not in right now, can I take a message?”

“Um, no,” the woman says. “I think it’s better if I call back another time.”

“Do you mind if I ask what this is about?” Andy says. He doesn’t like the idea of having to tell Allison that some strange woman called the house looking for her. Andy knows that Allison is already sacrificing so much of herself to stay in the Shermer area for a while. Any sign of trouble would put her on edge. 

The woman sighs. “Are you her roommate?”

Andy is momentarily taken aback by the question. “Uh, no. Actually, I guess so. I’m her fiancé.”

“Oh,” the woman says and Andy can’t help but think that this is the weirdest conversation he’s had in a long time. “Allie’s getting married?”

“Who is this?” Andy asks. He’s wracking his brain for people that he doesn’t know who also know Allison well enough to call her Allie and comes up blank.

“I’m sorry, this must be so weird,” the woman says. “I’m her cousin. I haven’t spoken to her in years but I saw her name in the phonebook and…”

“And,” Andy says. He didn’t realize that Allison still had family out there outside of her parents. “Do you want me to take down your number for her?”

“That would be great,” she says. “And tell her there’s no pressure. I know things with her family were…”

“Complicated,” Andy supplies. “I will.”

After taking down her number and placing the phone in the cradle, he rubs his hand over his face and wonders what just happened.

~~

It took Andy a long time before he could completely trust her again. He trusts her more than anything now, but even months into their trip, he found the task difficult.

When they were in Paris about six months into their trip, Andy woke up alone.

The sheets next to him were cold and Allison’s bag was gone from where it had been sitting on the dresser the night before. He pushed himself up to sitting, pulled his knees close, and curled his chin to his chest. 

His mind raced and his heart along with it as he tried not to cry. He visualized himself showing back up in Shermer, showing up on Bender and Claire’s doorstep heartbroken and _alone_ again. Bender had to snap him out of it last time, only letting Andy cry on Allison’s floor for a couple of hours, and he would have to do it again.

Just when he was wondering what would happen with them, with Claire and Bender and Brian and him without Allison, the door to their suite opened. 

He looked up and saw her standing there with a pastry bag and two cups of coffee.

“Hi,” she said, tilting her head slightly to the side. When she took a step closer to him, he flopped back on the bed and threw his arm over his eyes. “What happened?”

“Nothing,” Andy managed to croak out. He felt pathetic. 

He heard her drop their breakfast on the bedside table before crawling into bed next to him. He felt her hesitantly reach out and run her fingers through his hair.

“What’s wrong?” She said, her voice soft.

“Nothing,” he repeated, letting out a stuttering sigh. “I was just worried.”

Allison’s hand stilled in his hair as he dropped his arm from his eyes. “I was at the bakery downstairs. I picked up a croissant.” 

“I know,” he said. 

“I would never do that to you,” she said. “Leave you here like that.”

“You did before,” he snapped before he could stop himself. She withdrew her hand like he burned her. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to say that.”

“No, don’t apologize to me,” Allison said, her voice thick. “You’re right.”

“Allie,” he said, finally looking at her. He could see the tears in her eyes.

“I was afraid last time,” she said quietly. “I was afraid that you’d wake up one day and realize that I was too much for you, that you didn’t want me anymore.” He opened his mouth to say something, but she shook her head and continued. “I know now that my mind was playing tricks on me and that I was selfish to do what I did.”

Andy pushed himself up until he was sitting, watching her as she watches the hands in her lap. “I’m going to spend the rest of my life trying to make it up to you,” she said. She looked up at him then, leaning forward to rest her forehead against his. “You are the best thing life has given me.”

Andy leaned forward and kissed her, bringing his hand up and winding it in her hair. When he pulled back, he brushed his nose against hers. “I love you,” he said. “More than anything.”

He’s thinking about that day when he hears the key turn in the lock. He hasn’t been able to concentrate on work since the phone call, he’s been too preoccupied wondering how Allison will react. 

He hopes she’ll be all right. When the door creaks open, he stands.

~~

“I’m home,” Allie says as she tosses her keys in the bowl on the counter. She feels well-rested, like she’s just slept for hours, but really she’d just been at the mall. She never liked the mall, much to Claire’s chagrin, but she liked spending time with Claire and Laurie. 

“We’re all going to be married women soon enough,” Laurie had said, laughing into her soda.

“You guys are way behind,” Claire said. “We’re coming up on our five year anniversary.”

“Yes, Claire,” Allison said. “We know you’re an overachiever. Marrying your high school sweetheart, becoming the perfect American family, doing it all.”

Claire’s nose wrinkled. “I don’t know if you could call John and I ‘sweethearts’,” she said, “but you shouldn’t throw stones in glass houses, future Mrs. Clark.”

Allison kicked Claire’s shin under the table but did it lightly. “Can you believe that we’re all going to be married to men we knew in high school?” Laurie asked.

“Ew,” Allison said, which prompted the rest of them to laugh. 

She lets out a soft laugh at the recent memory before walking into their bedroom. “I bought you a shirt,” she says, tossing a bag on the bed next to Andy and the pile of papers he has stacked in front of him. 

“Thanks?” Andy says, reaching in and pulling out the blue fabric. “This is unexpected, but nice.”

“Of course it is,” Allison says, flopping down on the bed beside him. “I picked it out.”

He leans on his elbow and presses a kiss to her lips. Allison looks up at him when he pulls back and notices unwelcome tension sitting between his eyebrows. 

“What’s this?” She asks, poking her finger at the place where his skin wrinkles. 

“Someone called looking for you today,” he says. “She left her number.”

“Who?” Allison asks, her stomach twisting at Andy’s obvious anxiety.

“She said she was your cousin,” Andy says. 

“My cousin,” Allison repeats. “My cousin?”

“Yeah,” Andy says. “I just realized that she never gave me her name. I took down her number for you.”

Allison pauses before knitting her eyebrows together. “What the fuck?”

“I know,” he says. “It was the weirdest conversation.” 

“Christ,” Allison says.

“She said there was no pressure to call her back,” Andy says. “But I’m not really sure why she called in the first place.”

“I wonder which cousin it was,” Allison says. “I wonder if she’s seen my parents.”

“I don’t know. You could call her back and find out.”

Allison groans. “What the _fuck_. You know, Claire just told me that Bender’s mom showed up at the garage a few weeks ago.”

“His _mom_? I didn’t know…”

“That he had one? Me neither,” Allison says. “Claire says he’s been off. I don’t think he knows what to do about it.”

“What are _you_ going to do about _this_?” Andy asks.

Allison sighs and says “I don’t know.”

~~  
Brian worries his bottom lip between his teeth while he sits in Bender and Claire’s living room. Lily is babbling about something and Owen is playing with the toy Brian bought him. Laurie is here, chatting in the kitchen, but she feels too far away. The kids make him nervous.

He doesn’t know if it’s because they’re the offsprings of two of his best friends or if kids make him uneasy in general, but he doesn’t like to be left alone with them for long periods of time. They’re just so _fragile_.

Laurie was the one who offered to babysit so Patrick and Jimmy could enjoy their vacation. She knows that it makes him nervous, but he does love the kids.

“I’m back, stop worrying,” Laurie says, a mug in her hand. She sits down next to him on the couch and leans against his side. 

As he sits here, watching Claire and Bender’s kids play, he can’t imagine himself ever having some of his own. Laurie wants them and he does too, in theory, but he just can’t imagine it. 

Back when he was dating Greg, Brian reworked his brain so he could visualize what his life would look like if he spent it with a man. When he thought about it back then, he imagined his life being similar to Patrick and Jimmy’s. 

But then Brian had gotten too caught up in school, too stuck in his head, and Greg didn’t know how to deal with it. He got frustrated and dumped Brian with little remorse. Brian doesn’t exactly blame him for it, especially after he did the same thing, pulled back and shut down, to Laurie with different results.

He remembers being scared to tell Laurie about this part of his life, but to his surprise, she only said “I didn’t know that was something a person could feel”. She then asked him how he knew. 

The real answer, the _holy shit I’ve just learned something new about myself_ moment was when he met Greg, but when Brian thought back on it, he realized a lot of things about the thoughts he had during detention about Claire and _Bender_. Things that were not exactly platonic and things that he’ll never _ever_ admit to out loud. Bender doesn’t need the ego boost and he’d never let Brian hear the end of it.

When Greg dumped him and Laurie stumbled back into his life, he reworked his brain again. Brian was a planner, he had to know what to expect. Both of the lives he had imagined were different, but good. He can’t complain about that. 

“What are you thinking about?” Laurie asks, steam rising up from her mug.

“Nothing,” he says. “Just zoned out.”

“Well, now that I have you back, I have to ask you something,” Laurie says.

“Oh?” He asks, sparing a look to the kids before turning to look at her fully.

“Your sister wants to be my Maid of Honor,” Laurie says.

“Molly? Really?” Brian asks. “Did she ask you that?”

“She did,” Laurie says. “Not in so many words but that’s what she wants.”

“What about Anne?” Brian asks. “I thought you were going to ask her.”

“I did,” Laurie says. “She said no.”

“She said no?” Brian asks, brow furrowing. Anne is Laurie’s best friend, as weird as that is to admit. He never imagined that she’d say no.

“She’s going to be so close to her due date by the time our wedding comes around,” Laurie says, leaning her head against his. “She doesn’t want to be standing for that long and I don’t blame her.”

“Oh,” Brian says. “My sister, then?”

“If it’s okay with you,” Laurie says. “She’ll be so happy.”

“Well, I can’t say no to that,” Brian says. 

One quality about Laurie that Brian admires is her ability to make friends with everyone. He imagines that she could have had a diverse group of friends in high school if she hadn’t hitched her wagon to Olivia. The fact that Laurie and his sister are as close as they are isn’t necessarily surprising, but it makes Brian happy, even if he doesn’t admit it. 

“We’re getting married,” Laurie whispers, looking at Lily and Owen as they play. Claire told him that it’s rare for the two of them to play without fighting, so Brian looks on as well. 

“Yeah,” Brian says, thinking of homemade pasta and home ec classrooms. “We are.”

~~  
Jimmy looks at Patrick who is pointedly _not_ looking back at him. Jimmy has always liked looking at Patrick. Ever since he first saw him sitting in that English classroom their freshman year of college, his eyes have been drawn to him.

Patrick always gets antsy when they come back to Shermer. Jimmy doesn’t know if it’s because of his parents or because of how much he had to lie about himself here, but Patrick sleeps horribly every time they come back and can never sit still.

“Love,” Jimmy says, reaching across the mattress so his knuckles bump against Patrick’s knee. “What’s going on in that beautiful head of yours?”

Patrick shakes his head, looking down, but Jimmy catches a hint of a smile. “What if-”

Jimmy waits. He’s always waited for Patrick, since the moment he first met him. The first time he kissed Patrick, the boy practically freaked out. He shifted back like Jimmy had hurt him and stared at him through wide and stormy eyes. 

Jimmy waited then for what he thought was going to be a punch, but he ended up being pulled into a bruising kiss. Later, after Jimmy had kissed Patrick until he stopped shaking, Patrick told him that he wasn’t expecting it at all. Jimmy had sought Patrick out under the pretense that he needed help with English, but the reality was that he wanted to get as close as he could to the boy with auburn hair. 

“What if she doesn’t approve?” Patrick asks quietly. 

“Claire?” Jimmy asks. 

Claire Bender née Standish was a quiet blessing in their lives. Patrick hadn’t seen his family in so long, had been rejected so openly by them, until Claire showed up at their house with a beaten and bloody John Bender her senior year of high school. After she left that night, Patrick cried. The first time she used the number he gave her after that night, he cried again.

Jimmy never had much of a family, so he never fully understood Patrick’s struggle with his. Jimmy was raised by his grandmother, one of the kindest people to ever walk the Earth. She died a long time ago, right after Jimmy and Patrick started dating. He never had any parents to cast him out like Patrick did. All Jimmy could do to comfort him was hold him close. 

Claire, and by extension, John, wormed their way into Patrick’s, and by extension, Jimmy’s, lives in ways that Jimmy never expected them to. Claire loves her big brother and she likes having them visit. She wants them to know her husband, her friends, her children. 

“You can’t actually think that she won’t approve,” Jimmy says. “I know you don’t.”

After a moment, Patrick sighs. “No, I don’t.” He pauses for a beat before taking Jimmy’s hand in his. “Stop it.”

“Stop what?” Jimmy asks, rubbing his thumb over Patrick’s knuckles.

“Knowing me so well,” Patrick says. 

Jimmy laughs before leaning over and pressing a quick kiss to his lips. “Never.”

“Food’s here!” Jimmy hears Lily squeal from downstairs. He hears Owen shout something and Bender say something that’s muffled by the door between them.

“Ready?” Jimmy asks.

“Yeah,” Patrick says, giving Jimmy’s hand a quick squeeze. “Okay.”

They emerge downstairs and see Bender and Claire getting their kids dinner. They ordered from a Chinese food place in town, one of Patrick’s old favorites from high school. 

“We’re allowed to eat in front of the TV,” Lily says to Jimmy as he serves himself. “It’s takeout night.”

“That sounds lovely,” Jimmy says and the five year old rewards him with a smile. He makes his way to the living room and sits on the couch next to Patrick. Lily and Owen have spread their food out on the floor and Claire and Bender on the other wing of the couch, digging into the food.

“So,” Patrick says. “We have… Um…”

Claire looks up at her brother, putting her fork down. When Patrick goes silent, John squints at him before looking over at Jimmy.

“Um,” Jimmy says, watching Patrick fiddle with his takeout container. “We wanted to offer to babysit the kids for a night,” he says. Not exactly what Patrick was struggling to speak about a moment ago, but something they want to talk about nonetheless. “You could go into the city, stay the night, get away for a bit.”

Claire smiles softly at him. “We can’t ask you to do that. You’re on vacation.”

“We want to,” Jimmy says, nudging Patrick.

“Yes,” Patrick says. “Let us.”

“I’m not going to say no,” Bender says, looking over at where his children are eating food with their fingers and watching the television. “I feel like I haven’t slept in years.”

“Are you sure?” Claire asks again. 

“Yes, Claire,” Jimmy says. 

“Then, we accept,” she says. She looks over at her brother again. “Is that all?”

“No,” Jimmy says and he nudges Patrick again. Patrick needs to be the one to tell her, she’s his blood.

“We’re having a child,” Patrick says, quickly and unexpectedly. Jimmy thought it was going to take more coaxing to get it out of him and he’s glad it didn’t. 

“What?” Claire asks, eyes widening. “Really?”

“Is that…” John trails off, but Jimmy knows that he’s thinking, _Is that legal?_

“Our close friend’s sister offered to be our surrogate,” Jimmy explains. “She’s only a couple months along, but…”

“Holy shit,” Claire says, quietly enough so her kids don’t hear it. “Oh my God.”

“Congratulations,” Bender says. Jimmy has been continually surprised by Claire’s partner since he first met him. He used to try to give off a tough image, so much so that Jimmy was scared of what he thought of them the first time they met. Teenage boys say stupid things and Jimmy was worried, but John Bender has a heart bigger than anyone would expect. 

“Pat,” Claire says, reaching over and touching his knee. “I’m so happy for you.”

“Yeah?” He asks. He sounds relieved, the tension leaving him with his breath.

“Oh my God, yes,” she says. “My kids are going to have a _cousin_.” She says the word like it’s a mystifying thing. Then again, Jimmy supposes that it is. Claire didn’t have Patrick in her life for years and she probably never pictured him extending their family. 

“Yeah,” Patrick says, a similar tone shaping the word. “I guess they are.”

Jimmy leans closer to Patrick, feeling his body heat radiate through his clothes. Patrick turns his head and sends him a look that says _I love you_ and _You were right_ all wrapped in one. 

Jimmy sends a look right back.

~~  
Claire pulls back the curtains to look out over the city. Claire can’t even remember the last time they left the Shermer area, but she knows it’s been a long time.

John is lying on top of the covers on the bed, his arm thrown over his eyes. They ate dinner at a nice restaurant downtown and walked back to the hotel in the spring chill. As they walked back, Claire thought about how John Bender has been in her life for ten years. 

March 24th came and went without fanfare. Claire didn’t even realize what day it was until Brian called her after dinner to say “happy anniversary”. Claire loves them, loves her friends more than anything, but she realized in that moment that they’re _grown up_ now. It seemed silly when the thought crossed her mind, especially since she has two children, but she hadn’t realized how separate her life is from her friends until that moment.

After she got off the phone with Brian, she immediately called over to Allison and Andy’s apartment to say a similar thing. They promised to all get together and have dinner soon, but they haven’t had the chance to yet. 

The reunion is coming up fast and they’ll all be together again soon enough. 

“Come here,” Bender mumbles, reaching out the hand that isn’t covering his face and feeling for hers. 

She smiles at him and takes it before lying along the side of him and leaning her head against his shoulder. It’s been a long time since they had time to themselves, not having to worry about the kids. Well, she’s still worrying about the kids because Owen is a picky eater and Lily gets anxious at night, but she trusts that her brother will be able to handle it. 

“John,” Claire says. 

He hums before removing his arm from his face and threading his fingers through her hair. He really does look tired. Claire reminds herself to talk to him about cutting back his hours so he can get more sleep. She thinks he’ll resist and it may be an unpleasant conversation, so she saves it for a later time. 

“This is nice,” Claire says, leaning into the touch. 

“It is,” John says, pressing a kiss to her forehead. He goes quiet, rubbing his hand back and forth over her scalp. She can practically hear him thinking, so she stays still and lets him. “I think I’m going to reach out to my mother.”

“Yeah?” Claire asks, looking up at his face. He keeps his eyes on the ceiling while he plays with her hair.

“Just me, though,” he says. “Not the kids. Not yet.”

“Okay,” Claire says. Ever since his mother showed up, Bender has been on edge and even more exhausted than usual. She hopes that meeting her will give him some sense of closure.

“You can come with me,” he says, “if you want to.”

“Of course I’ll come,” Claire says. John doesn’t like to talk about stuff like this, he doesn’t like to be vulnerable for too long. She bails him out, sitting up out of his arms and leaning over to the bedside table. “We should order room service.”

“Room service? We just got back from dinner,” John says but he’s grinning, so Claire grabs the menu and opens it. 

“We didn’t get dessert,” she says. “Look, they have chocolate cake!”

“Okay, okay,” he relents, just like she knew he would. “We’ll split it.”

Later, after the bellhop comes up with the food, Claire and Bender eat the cake while sitting on top of the covers and watching a movie. 

“This is good,” Claire says. “Better than I expected it to be, actually.” 

“It is,” Bender says and then he reaches his fork over and steals a piece of hers. 

She gasps and tries to get a piece of his but he pulls the plate out of reach before she can. “That is _not_ fair.”

“Bite me,” he says, earning him a shove. He still knows how to be an asshole and he can still do it well. 

“Fuck you,” she says, the words feeling weird on her tongue. They never swear in front of the kids, making the swift transition after Lily was born. John reaches over and pinches the skin above her knee.

“Bed?” He asks. 

“Mm,” she hums, leaning back against the pillows. She hears Bender clear the plates before he’s lying down next to her.

“You look like you want to say something,” Bender says, facing her on the bed. 

“Maybe,” she says and when he raises an eyebrow, she sighs. “I think I might be pregnant again.”

John’s face remains neutral, just like it had when she took the test and found out she was pregnant with Owen. She wonders if he’s trying to make up for how he reacted when she found out about Lily. “Think?”

“I haven’t taken a test yet,” Claire clarifies, “but I feel like I am.”

Bender looks at her. His unrelenting gaze used to make her anxious, she used to wonder what he was seeing. Now though, she just lifts her hand up and traces his eyebrow. 

“How?” He asks and before Claire can tease him about it, he rolls his eyes. “I mean, we haven’t exactly had time.”

“The shower, I think,” she says. “After your mother stopped by your work.”

“Oh, right,” Bender says, smirking at the memory. “I forgot about that.”

Claire snorts as he moves closer and presses his face to her neck. “Should I be offended by that?”

“Mm, no,” he says, pressing a kiss to the skin below his lips. “I remember now.”

“I know it’s way too early, but I feel like it might be a girl,” Claire says. She’s been right twice before about the gender of her children and she has a feeling that she’ll be right this time too. 

“That sucks for Brian,” John says. “We’re supposed to name the next one after him.”

Claire leans back into the pillow while John kisses down her neck. He wraps his hand around her waist and she laughs. “Three,” she says wistfully, thinking about the possibility of having another baby.

John groans and pulls away. “We are never going to sleep again.”

“Not until the youngest is ten at the least,” Claire says. But she’s smiling and so is John.

~~  
Andy is sitting on the couch of his old house, reading over something for work while Allison’s head resting on his shoulder, when his mother rushes down the stairs with an armful of shirts.

“Andy,” his mother says and Allison lifts her head in surprise. “Would you wear any of these?”

“Uh, what?” Andy says as he watches his mom drop the shirts on the floor in front of him. “Mom?”

But his mom is already marching back upstairs. “Sort through those,” she says before she disappears completely. 

Andy looks at the pile while Allison reaches over and pulls a shirt from the top. “Were these your dad’s?” She asks as she touches the fabric. 

“I think so,” Andy says, voice barely there. His dad was built much differently than Andy; his mother cannot possibly think that he would fit into any of this.

Soon enough, his mother reappeared, this time her arms full of pants. She drops them on top of the shirts in an unceremonious fashion. “These too.”

“Mom, what’s going on?” Andy asks, but she’s already turned away and is walking up the stairs again.

“Go,” Allison says, nodding her head to where his mother just disappeared. “I’ll… do something with this.”

Andy runs his hand through his hair before nodding and taking off after his mom. He finds her digging through her closet, pulling things off of hangers and throwing them on the floor.

“Mom,” Andy says, rushing up next to her and grabbing her hands in his. “What are you doing?”

“I need this stuff out of this house,” she says. “It’s been sitting here for too long.”

It’s been months since his father’s funeral and his mother has been withdrawn. Andy had to admit that she’s always been withdrawn. She was a good mother but once he hit a certain age, she drew back from them. At least, she did until his senior year, when things started to fall back into place. 

“I want it out,” she says, her black hair falling in front of her face. “It’s holding us back.”

“Mom,” Andy says. “Come sit.”

He guides her to the edge of the bed and sits next to her. She looks at the clothes scattered around the floor and shakes her head. “His stuff, it’s weighing me down.”

“I know, Mom,” Andy says. 

“He loved us,” his mother says, “and I miss him, but we need to move on.”

Andy knows that _we_ means _I_ , so he holds her hand. “Okay,” he says. “But I’m not going to fit into any of his clothes. And to be completely honest, I don’t really want them.”

His mom huffs out a laugh. “Your dad didn’t really have the best fashion sense, did he?”

“No,” Andy agrees. “We can box them up and put them in the attic if you want.”

“Yes,” his mother says. “Okay.”

“I’m sorry, Mom,” Andy says, wrapping his arm around her and squeezing her shoulder. 

“It’ll be okay, Andy,” his mother says. Andy knows this, but his mother is just realizing it for the first time. “We will be just fine.”

“Yes, Mom,” he says. “We will be.”

She pats his knee before bringing her hand to her face. “Go to Allison. I need some time,” she says. Andy nods and stands up, walking towards the door. “Hold onto her, Andy. She’s good for you.”

Andy smiles before nodding slowly again. “I will,” he says. He shuts the door behind him as he leaves.

“Is she okay?” Allison asks when Andy reappears. She’s folded the clothes and set them aside, clearing the floor and the couch. 

Andy sits down next to her and grabs her hand. “She’ll be okay.”

Allison leans forward and kisses him lightly. Andy tangles his fingers in her hair and pulls her closer, deepening the kiss while still keeping it chaste. He loves her, loves how he feels with her. They’ve had a bit of a bumpy road to get where they are, but they’ll never end up like his parents, or hers for that matter.

“Are you okay?” Allison asks when she pulls back. 

“I am,” he says. “I have you.”

Allison throws her head back in a magnificent laugh, a sound that makes his heart warm. “That was so cheesy.”

“Not untrue,” Andy says.

“No, not untrue,” Allison says before leaning forward and kissing him again.

~~  
“Allison,” Brian asks from where he’s stretched out on the couch in Allison and Andy’s apartment. “Am I going to get an advanced copy of your book?”

“Sorry, those are only for my _closest_ friends,” Allison teases. She’s writing in a notebook, either outlining her next novel or drawing. 

“Fuck off,” Brian says, kicking her outstretched legs. 

“I’m getting a shipment of them next week,” Allison says. “I can give you one after the reunion, if you want.”

“Of course I want,” Brian says. “I have to know what happens.”

Allison smiles but tries to smother it. She always gets embarrassed when anyone compliments her writing or the drawings she puts in her books. It took years for her to even admit to herself that she was talented. 

“Hey,” Brian asks. “Whatever happened with your cousin?”

Allison sighs, leaning her head back. “I haven’t called her back,” she says. “Do you think I should?”

“I mean, it’s your decision,” Brian says. “But why wouldn’t you?”

Allison looks at him with a look in her eyes that he can’t decipher. He is surprised that she is still able to do that, still surprise him with looks he’s never seen before. They’ve been friends for ten years, but Allison is still an unpredictable person. 

“I guess you’re right,” Allison says.

“Then, do it,” Brian says. Allison narrows her gaze at him.

“You’re a piece of work,” she says. “But fine.”

She stands up, walks over to the phone, and picks it up. “What, right now?” Brian asks, sitting up and watching her. 

“You want me to so badly,” she says. Before she dials the number, she looks at Brian with her eyebrows knitted together. “What do I say to her?”

“Whatever you want,” he says. “Ask her everything you want to know.”

“You think?” Allison asks. Brian is always surprised when Allison shows her insecurities in front of him. Even though they’ve been friends for a decade, Allison can be hard for him to read unless she shows him.

“Yes,” Brian says. “You deserve it, Allie. You have more right than anyone to get answers about your family.” He stands up and gives her a quick hug. “I’ll leave you to it.”

“Brian,” Allison says as he grabs his coat. “Thank you.”

“Of course,” he says. “I’ll see you."

“Good bye, Bri,” Allison says, smiling at him. 

“Bye,” Brian says. “Get your answers.”

Allison sends him a smile and as he leaves, he hears her dialing the phone number. 

~~  
When Andy gets home from work, the apartment is dark and quiet. _Too quiet_. Andy’s heart immediately starts to pick up speed. He dumps his keys and his wallet on the counter and rushes to the bedroom.

Just as he expected, just as he _feared_ really, he finds Allison tucked under the covers, only the tips of her curls showing. Andy sighs quietly before kicking off his shoes and climbing on top of the covers until he is sitting next to her. 

He’s quiet for a long moment, hoping that she’ll say something to break the silence but knowing that she won’t. He grips the edge of the comforter and gently pulls it back until he can see her face. 

“Allie,” he whispers into the dark room. “What happened?”

Allison groans and rolls onto her back. She’s still quiet, staring up at the ceiling. Andy knows to wait, so he does. After what couldn’t have been less than ten minutes, her voice breaks through the dark.

“I called Marie back,” Allison says. Before Andy can ask who Marie is, Allison fills in the blanks for him. “My parents are still alive.”

“You called your cousin?” Andy asks, reaching over to comb his fingers through her hair. 

“They never even left the state,” she says, ignoring the question. “Just me.”

Andy had feared something like this would happen. Allison’s been doing well lately, she hasn’t had a bad day in a long time, but Andy always knew deep down that it wouldn’t take much to push her over the edge again. 

He lies down next to her and watches her side profile. He plays with her hair until she turns to face him again. She brings up her hand and touches his cheek. He can feel the cold metal of her engagement ring against his skin.

“It doesn’t matter,” she whispers, nudging his nose with hers. “I have you and you’re better than the lot of them.”

Andy smiles softly before leaning in to kiss her. “You do have me,” he says when he pulls back, “but it also matters.”

Allison hums noncommittally, kissing him again. “I’m fine, I promise,” she says.

“You’re not, but it’s okay,” Andy says. “Do you want to call Claire?”

“I would, but she’s with Bender meeting his mom,” Allison says. When Andy raises his eyebrows, she smiles. “We should all start a shitty parent support group.”

“Brian can mediate since he’s the only one with good ones,” Andy says. “You have counseling in a couple days, right?”

“Yes,” Allison says. “I’ll be okay. It just sucks.”

“It does,” Andy says. “Do you want to go to bed or do you want to go eat ice cream and watch a movie?”

Allison lets out a laugh and strokes his cheek with her thumb. “What about ice cream in bed?” 

“There’s an idea,” Andy says. He looks at her face and sees the strength hidden in her smile lines. He loves her completely with every part of himself and he would do anything to keep her happy. “Vanilla or chocolate?” 

“Chocolate, obviously,” Allison says, leaning back into the pillow. 

Andy throws his legs off the bed and stands. As he walks out of the room, he hears Allison mumble, “I love you.”

Andy smiles and looks back at their bed, where Allison is buried in the sheets. “I love you too,” he says before disappearing into the kitchen to make Allison the biggest ice cream sundae he can manage. 

~~

“This is a bad idea,” Bender says, fidgeting in his seat.

“We can leave,” Claire says, placing her hand on his knee and stroking her thumb back and forth.

“No,” Bender says. “But this is a bad idea.” 

“It will be okay,” Claire says. “We can leave whenever you want.”

Bender nods and then stiffly inhales as he eyes the door. Claire looks up and sees a woman walking through the doors, a long scarf wrapped around her neck. She sees the resemblance immediately and is baffled that someone has existed in this world _looking_ like John Bender this whole time. She can’t imagine what John must be thinking right now, so she slips her hand into his and squeezes. 

He squeezes back as his mother makes her way over to the table. Claire looks at him and he looks back. They stand up to meet her, it seems like the polite thing to do. 

“John,” the woman says when she approaches. “No need to stand for me,” she says. She smiles at Claire as they all sit down. It’s awkward, and John doesn’t say anything to make it any less awkward, so Claire takes initiative.

“Hello,” she says. “I’m Claire, John’s wife.”

“Hello, dear,” she says, smiling. “It’s so nice to meet you.”

Claire smiles politely and then turns to look at John. He meets her eye and opens his mouth like he wants to say something but doesn’t know what. After a second, he looks at his mother and says, “How… how have you been?”

“I’ve been just fine,” she says. “How about you?”

“Good,” he says. “We’ve been busy.”

“I can imagine. I remember those days,” she says, pulling her scarf off and holding it in her lap. “Two young ones running around.”

“How many kids do you have?” Bender says, finding Claire’s knee with his hand under the table. He seems relatively calm, calmer than Claire expected him to be.

“Including you? Five,” she says. “I’ve got two girls and three boys. The youngest just turned 18 this year. She’s starting college in the fall.”

Bender’s hand tightens on her knee when she includes him in the count of her children. It’s rather bold of her, Claire thinks, but she’s trying. “That’s nice,” Claire says. 

“I’ve told them about you,” she says. “I’ve been looking for you.”

“Really,” John says and it’s not a question. “And what do they think about that?”

“They want to meet you,” she says, “but only if you’re okay with it.”

“Maybe,” John says, surprising Claire. “Someday.”

Bender’s mother smiles brightly at him. Before she can say anything else, the waitress interrupts them to get their drink and appetizer orders. When she walks away, Bender’s mother looks between Claire and John like she’s trying to understand how they fit together so well. 

“Tell me about your children,” she says. “If you want to.”

Bender squeezes her knee under the table and she takes his signal. “Lily’s our oldest. She’s starting kindergarten in the fall.”

“Her name is Lily?” Bender’s mother says, her mouth dropping open. “After my mother?”

“Yes,” Bender croaks and then clears his throat. “She looked out for me.”

Bender’s mother sends her son an indiscernible look before looking back at Claire. Claire takes it as a cue to keep going, so she does. “Owen is three. He’s quiet, probably because Lily doesn’t let him get a word in very often.”

“That’s lovely,” she says. “Wonderful. Do you think you’ll have any more?”

Bender and Claire look at each other. It’s a question they get often from people and it’s always awkward, but it’s par for the course when you have a young family. 

“Yes, I think so,” Claire says, pressing a soft hand to her abdomen under the table. She took a test when she and John got back from the city and it came back positive. They aren’t telling anyone yet, it’s too early and she isn’t showing yet. 

“Probably not five, though,” Bender says and the joke startles a laugh out of his mother. 

“I’m so glad you agreed to do this, John,” his mother says, tears springing from behind her eyes. “I know it must not have been easy for you, especially since I left you behind. But I am grateful for the second chance you’re giving me.”

“It’s…” John starts before cutting himself off with a cough. “It’s going to take time. It may never happen.”

“I know,” his mother says, eyes still glassy. She reaches over and grasps John’s free hand, the one not grasping Claire’s knee. “I’m just thankful that I get to see you again. I won’t ask for anything else.”

Claire watches John smile. To anyone else, it probably doesn’t look like much, but the tiny smile gives himself away to Claire. She rests her hand on top of his and traces her thumb across the veins on the back of his hand. 

“So,” his mother says, looking between Claire and Bender again. “Tell me more about your lives.”

John does, less reluctantly than before, and Claire has never been more proud of him. 

~~

When they were first together, peaking right after John’s dad died, Claire used to wake John up from nightmares all the time. She’s not surprised to see how gentle he is with their kids when they come into their room after having a bad dream. Usually, it’s Lily who ends up in their bed, which Claire attributes to her overactive imagination, but tonight it’s Owen. 

Claire’s half asleep when she feels her son’s small body wiggle his way in between her and her husband. She hears John whisper-singing and when she rolls over, she sees him brushing back Owen’s hair and wiping away his tears.

Her eyes meet his over their son’s curly hair and she reaches out to rub Owen’s back. “Bad dream, baby?”

She sees her son’s small head nod in the dark. As her eyes adjust, she sees that Owen is gripping John’s hand and has his head tucked under his chin. Even though her little boy is scared, she can’t help but smile softly at the scene.

Lily was an unexpected surprise, but Owen was planned. She loves both her kids more than she ever thought possible and she can’t comprehend how her parents and John’s treated them the way they did. After meeting Bender’s mother today, Claire felt sympathy for her, but she knows that her actions still affect John today. She can’t forgive her completely, not yet.

They lie like this for a while, John whispering comforting words to Owen while Claire rubs his back gently. Soon enough, he stops crying and starts to drift off to sleep. Normally, they let their kids stay the night in their bed when they have nightmares, but tonight’s the night before the reunion and everyone needs to get their rest. John gets up and scoops the boy up in his arms. He’s gone for a few minutes, likely waiting to make sure Owen falls completely asleep in his bed before leaving. 

When he comes back, he slides under the covers and immediately reaches for Claire. She scoots closer so he can wrap his arms around her, which he does but not before pressing a soft kiss to her lips. His feet are cold against hers but the rest of him is warm. She reaches up and pushes her hand through his hair. It’s shorter than it used to be, but it’s still long enough on the top for her to play with the strands.

He places his hands at her waist and rubs his thumbs in circles over her small bump. She remembers that the first time they did this, when she was pregnant with Lily, she was terrified of getting fat. She was surprised when John didn’t care, that he didn’t actually believe what he said in detention that day.

She was even more surprised to find that he still found her attractive, that he still wanted her. But he does, even after all this time, and she feels the same right back. They love each other the same way, but it’s deeper now. What started 10 years ago as a rebellion against her family and friends became the best thing she’s ever had.

She can’t believe that tomorrow, she's going to her ten year high school reunion. She finds it weird to think about a time when she knew nothing about the man lying next to her, back when he was cruel because he wanted her attention and she gave it willingly. 

He intertwines his fingers with hers between them, bringing their knuckles up to his lips in the dark. He’s become more outwardly affectionate over the years, increasingly so as their ten year anniversary approached.

“We have to find a way to name this baby after Brian,” Claire whispers into the dark. “It’s his turn, even if it is a girl.”

Bender hums agreeably. Lily and Owen’s middle names are Allison and Clark respectively and Brian will be mad if this baby doesn’t have his name somewhere in there. “It’s going to be weird,” he says, and it takes a second for Claire to realize he’s changed the subject. “Seeing all those people tomorrow.”

“I didn’t think that you cared,” she says.

“I don’t,” he whispers back. “I wonder if Vernon will be there.”

“He probably will be,” Claire says. “Are you going to be okay?”

“Yeah,” John says, leaning forward and kissing her neck. “Never got to show my old man, but I can show Vernon.”

“Show him what?”

“That he was wrong about me.”

“He was,” Claire says, holding him close to her. She remembers their vice principal calling her husband worthless, and that was just what he said in front of other people. 

Bender hums again. “I love you,” he says, easier now than it was when he first realized his feelings for her. “We gotta try to sleep so we aren’t dead on our feet tomorrow.”

“So sleep,” she says and she watches his breathing even out next to her. 

~~

“God,” Laurie says, dropping her head between her knees. “Fuck.”

“Woah,” Brian says as he puts the car in park. They’ve just pulled into the parking lot of Shermer High for the reunion. He rubs his hand back and forth on her back. “What’s wrong?”

“God, I don’t want to go in there,” she says, her voice muffled by her hunched over position. “I’m so nauseous.”

“Deep breaths,” Brian says, unsure of how else he can comfort her. 

“I told Anne it would be okay, but look at me,” she says, sitting up. Her face is red from all the blood that flowed to her head. 

“Hey,” Brian says, running his fingers through her hair until he’s gently holding the back of her head. “We’re going to be fine. Just fine.”

Laurie nods but still doesn’t look sure. He leans in and presses a hard kiss to her lips. Brian has actually been looking forward to the reunion. There’s no one he is scared of seeing and he gets to go back to the place where he met his best friends and his future wife. But he knows that Laurie feels differently and that she’s anxious about seeing Olivia again. 

“She might not even come,” Brian says when he pulls back.

“She will,” Laurie says. “But it’ll be okay.”

“Ready to go in?” Brian asks. “I think I see Anne and Stubby walking in right now.”

“Yes,” Laurie says. “I mean, no. But let’s go.”

~~

“Can you believe it’s been ten years?” Andy says, looking up at the school with Allison’s hand in his. 

“Yes,” Allison says. “We were just kids back then.”

Andy supposes that she’s right. They’ve been through a lot since he used to frequent these halls. They’ve broken up, gotten back together, and traveled the world since then. He didn’t even feel like the same person he was when he went here anymore.

“We’ll probably say the same thing ten years from now,” Andy says, squeezing her hand. 

Allison looks at him with that fond look she gets. Sometimes, when he thinks about those two and a half years where he had to live without her, he wonders how he ever thought he could live without her. She’s a part of him, as much as he’s a part of her. And it all started here, at this place in front of them.

“Let’s go in,” she says. “Brian’s probably been here for an hour already.”

Andy snorts. “You’re probably right. Hopefully he’s picked out a good table for us.”

“I wonder if Vernon still works here,” Allison says, voice quiet. 

Andy looks at her and knows exactly what he’s thinking. “I guess we’ll find out.”

He keeps holding her hand as they walk through the doors.

~~

“I’ll meet you in there,” Bender says, extracting his arm from where it sits around Claire’s waist. “I gotta take a leak.”

Claire grimaces at his word choice but looks at the doors that lead to the gymnasium. “Are you sure?” She asks.

“Yes, Princess,” he says, getting her to roll her eyes. “I’ll be fine.”

And he was fine. He didn’t get lost going to the bathroom, the same bathroom he used to smoke in when he didn’t have time to sneak out to under the bleachers. He made his way back to the gymnasium and looks around, trying to see if he can spot Claire in the crowd. 

He’s about to start walking around, trying to find his friends, when he hears a voice. 

“Hello, Sir,” the voice says from behind him. Bender turns around and finds himself face to face with Richard Vernon. “Welcome back to Shermer High. Don’t forget to pick up a name tag.”

He wishes Claire weren’t already inside because she would get a kick out of this. Bender crosses his arms over his chest and coldly regards his former vice principal. “You don’t recognize me, do you?” Bender doesn’t think that he looks much different than he did ten years ago, but maybe he does.

“I’m sorry,” Vernon says, furrowing his brow. He looks much the same, just with more wrinkles. “It’s been a decade and my memory isn’t what it used to be.”

Bender snorts. “I find it hard to believe that you would have forgotten me, Dick.”

Vernon’s expression changes at the unfavorable nickname. “John Bender.” It isn’t a question, but Bender nods anyway. “I wouldn’t have expected you to show up here.”

“Why not?” Bender asks. “Think I would be dead in a ditch somewhere? Or in jail?”

Vernon frowns, sparing a glance around them to see if anyone is paying attention to their conversation. He must deem it appropriate to continue, because he says “Reunions don’t seem like something you’d be interested in.”

“Probably not,” Bender says. “But my wife wanted to come.”

Vernon narrows his gaze. “Wife?”

“Married five years now. She likes these kinds of things,” Bender says. “I thought it was a waste of time, especially since we had to find someone to watch the kids, but she insisted.”

“Kids,” Vernon says, eyebrow raised. 

“It was also hard to find someone to cover for me at work,” he continues, determined to shove everything he can at this man. “Since I’m the owner and all.”

Vernon scoffs at him. “You’ve always been a liar, Bender.”

“You think I’m lying?” Bender is surprised that he would say it out loud.

“You’re a piece of shit,” Vernon hisses, careful to keep his voice down. “I don’t know why you’ve shown up here or what you have planned, but you are not going to ruin this day for everyone else.”

“I told you why I showed up here,” Bender says, refusing to let his anger show. “It’s your problem that you don’t believe me.”

Vernon flushes deep red and glares. “I don’t know what your goal here is, but-“

“There you are. I was wondering where you disappeared to.” Bender breathes a sigh of relief when he hears her. He feels her hand on his back as he places his arm over her shoulders. “Hi, Vice Principal Vernon.”

Vernon composes himself rather quickly and doesn’t let his surprise show. Instead, he looks at Claire’s name tag and smiles at her. “Hello, Ms. Standish.”

“Technically, it’s Mrs. Bender now, but they asked us to put our maiden names on the tags,” she says. 

Vernon looks like he might stroke out in front of them. Bender can’t help but smile while he watches the man who used to terrorize him flounder. 

“We should get back to our friends,” Claire says, tugging on the back of his shirt where Vernon can’t see. “It was nice to see you, Mr. Vernon,” she lies.

“Yes, it was nice to see you, Dick,” Bender says. “Just one suggestion though. You should probably consider retirement.”

Before he can say anything in response, Bender takes Claires hand and leads them away from their old vice principal. 

“Jesus, John,” Claire whispers as she leads him toward a table in the back corner. “Are you okay?”

“I’m okay,” he says. “He thought I was lying.”

“He’s a complete asshole,” Claire says, her voice sharp with anger. 

“Hey,” Bender says, lifting their joined hands and pressing a quick, uncharacteristic kiss to the back of hers. “I’m really fine.”

“Okay,” Claire says, squeezing his hand. “Let’s go find our friends.”

~~

Brian and Laurie are making their rounds, Laurie greeting old classmates that Brian has no recollection of. He keeps his hand on her back, as if feeling the fabric of her dress makes him feel less alien.

He catches Laurie playing with her ring, a nervous tic of hers, and Brian follows her line of vision to see where she’s looking. On the opposite side of the gym, he spots a blonde woman leaning against the wall, looking around the room in distain. She’s alone and she looks put together, but she’s already got a drink in hand. 

Brian realizes that it’s Olivia.

Laurie explained that Olivia was cruel to her until she offered her protection, and Laurie felt like she couldn’t refuse. Being Mexican in a majority white town came with its own challenges and Laurie was trying to protect herself. Laurie has been apologetic, saying she got wrapped up in it and that she felt better about herself when Olivia would tear into someone. Brian has seen her cry many times about the person she used to be.

Connecting with Claire helped and having someone who understands made it a little bit better. Anne also helped, accepting Laurie as her friend once she had proof that she had changed.

He doesn’t know about Olivia. 

Brian rubs Laurie’s back and leans down to whisper in her ear. “Are you okay?”

Laurie hums but turns toward him. “I’m not ready yet,” she says. “Can we sit down?”

“Of course,” Brian says. When they get back to the table, everyone is there. Laurie slips in next to Anne and Brian in the seat next to her. Bender is in the seat next to him and he bumps his knuckles against Brian’s shoulder.

“Hey, Bri,” Bender says. “How’ve you been?”

“Good,” Brian says. He hadn’t realized it had been so long since he’d seen his friend. “Laurie and I launched our business.”

“Yeah?” Bender says. “It’s going well?”

“Yeah, I think so,” Brian says. The truth is that they opened with really good numbers and things were looking very promising. He doesn’t want to jinx it though, so he doesn’t say it out loud.

Bender sees right through him of course, and he smirks. “I’m sure it’s great.”

“Hey, Brian,” Claire says. Brian missed them, it was good to have them back in one place. Andy and Allison are on the other side of the table, Andy sitting next to Stubby. They’re chatting like they never lost contact while Anne and Laurie whisper to each other next to him.

“Hey,” Brian says. They look good, like they’ve finally been able to get some rest. “How are the kids?”

“The same,” Bender says. “I don’t understand how they have so much energy.”

Claire looks around the room. “Do you think we should go socialize?” She asks. “We’re the only ones sitting down.”

“Sweets, I’m going to be honest with you,” Bender says, his arm along the back of Claire’s chair. “I would rather die.”

“Shut up,” Claire says, pinching his side. “I’m sure some of your old friends are here, too.”

“I doubt that very much, actually,” Bender says. 

“We’ll go with you, Claire,” Anne says, nudging Laurie. Claire smiles and looks over at Allison.

“You’re going to make me,” Allison says and when Claire nods in response, Allison rolls her eyes. “Fine.”

Brian honestly doesn’t know why Claire is so adamant about talking to these people, but as long as he isn’t being dragged into the fire, he’s fine to sit and be quiet.

“You okay?” He whispers to Laurie. She just nods and threads her arm through Anne’s. 

“We’ve got this,” she says, and Brian watches as the women stand up. Claire ruffles Bender’s hair as she joins them and then they’re off. 

“That’s not going to end well,” Bender says, watching as Claire disappears into the crowd.

“No,” Brian says, agreeing. “I need a drink.”

Bender laughs, throwing his head back. “Let’s get some, then. Might make this go by faster.”

~~

Anne runs her hand absentmindedly over her bump while Laurie and Claire chatter away by her side. Allison stands quietly on her other side, and she looks over at her gratefully. She appreciates Allison Reynolds and her likewise discomfort at socializing with people she doesn’t know at an event she barely wants to be at.

She doesn’t know how Laurie talked her into this, she barely even wanted to come in the first place. But David is having a good time talking to Andy and his old classmates, she would never take it away from him. 

No one seems to recognize her, or Allison for that matter, so they just stand off to the side while Claire and Laurie talk to people they used to be in clubs with. 

“This is weird,” Allison whispers and Anne turns to face her.

“Yes, it certainly is,” Anne says. “I don’t know any of these people.”

“Andy and Stubby seem to be having a good time for themselves,” Allison says, nodding her head over to where the two men are talking animatedly to their old teammates.

“It’s weird to see him here,” Anne whispers, mostly to herself, but she sees Allison nod next to her. 

“It really is,” Allison says. 

She watches Laurie and Claire converse easily with old acquaintances. She is zoned out, thinking about how much longer David wants to stay here, when Allison grabs her arm.

“Don’t look now,” Allison says. “But the enemy is approaching.”

Anne can’t help herself, she looks. What she sees sends a shiver down her spine: Olivia walking up to her husband and smiling.

“What do I do?” Anne whispers, hands wrapped possessively around her bump.

“We go interrupt, that’s what we do,” Laurie says, whipping around and pulling herself out of the conversation she was having with her old classmates. Anne has never heard her so angry. She grabs Anne’s hand and pulls her along, Claire and Allison following quickly behind. Anne watches Allison pull Andy away, leaving just them, David, and Olivia.

She hears him talking to her before they reach them. “I don’t have anything to say to you,” David says, keeping his voice low so he didn’t draw attention to them.

“What? We were friends, weren’t we?” She says. She sounds genuinely confused and her face matches when she spots them approaching. “Laurie? Is that you? And Claire.”

“Hello, Olivia,” Laurie says, dropping her hand. 

Anne feels light-headed just looking at her old tormentor. She feels a grounding arm slip around her waist and a kiss against the top of her head. 

“Let’s go sit down,” David whispers, pulling her closer.

“No way,” Olivia says, looking at them. Anne feels like she might be sick, she really didn’t actually think Olivia would recognize her. “How did _this_ happen?”

Anne gets angry at the implication of her words. She’s speaking before she can stop herself. “I hope you’ve been well, Olivia. If you’ll excuse us, we’re going to take our seats.”

“Wait,” Olivia says, but she doesn’t. She turns around and grabs David’s hand, pulling him along behind her. 

~~

Laurie watches as Anne walks away, David at her side. She’s angry on her behalf and when she looks back at Olivia, she’s seething. 

“Hello girls,” Olivia says, looking between her and Claire. “How have you been?”

Claire reacts first, considerably more calm than Laurie would have been. “We’ve been alright. Yourself?”

Olivia smiles. “I’ve done a lot of traveling. I just couldn’t stay in this godforsaken town any longer.” She takes a sip from her drink. “But I couldn’t pass up the chance to see what happened to all my old classmates.” The wicked look she sends in Anne and David’s direction makes Laurie’s blood boil. 

“Right,” Claire says. Laurie feels her eyes on her. 

“What about you? What have you been up to?” Olivia asks. Laurie wonders how she still has the profound ability to make a person feel inadequate without saying anything substantial. 

Claire waits for a second, likely waiting for Laurie to say something, but she speaks when she doesn’t. “Uh, I’m married with two kids. I’m the VP of the company I work at,” she says. 

“Whatever happened to that guy you dated at the end of senior year?” Olivia asks, leaning against the wall. “Did he end up in jail?”

Laurie watches Claire narrow her gaze at Olivia. “No,” Claire says, her voice fierce. “I married him.”

“Are you serious?” Olivia asks. Laurie really wants to walk away from this conversation. “That’s unexpected,” she says, mostly to herself. She turns to Laurie and her stomach drops. “What about you, Laurie?”

“I’m engaged,” Laurie manages to say. “I’m starting a business.”

“Very nice,” Olivia says as if Laurie was asking for her approval. Laurie might have, years ago, but she couldn’t care less about Olivia’s opinion now. “Well ladies, this has been a nice catch-up, but we should go back to our tables.”

“Right,” Laurie says, crossing her arms over her chest.

“Maybe I’ll see you around later,” Olivia says. 

“Maybe,” Claire says, but when Olivia turns and walks away, she shakes her head.

“God,” Laurie says as she and Claire make their way toward their table. “Is it bad that I wish she was doing worse? Maybe then I would feel vindicated.”

“It’s an act,” Claire says simply. “It’s always been an act.”

When Laurie gets back to the table, Brian doesn’t say anything. He just slips his hand into hers and squeezes. 

Laurie is happy with her lot in life and that’s all that matters.

~~

“Should we sneak off?” Andy asks. He mostly says it to Allison, but he looks at each of his friends in question.

“Sure,” Allison says, laying her hand on top of his. 

“Anywhere is better than here,” Bender says and although she looks like she wants to argue with him, Claire keeps quiet. 

“Library?” Andy suggests conspiratorially and Bender laughs at his tone. 

“I was counting on it, actually,” Brian says. “Wanna come?”

The question is addressed to Laurie, who shrugs. Anne and David took off a little while ago, so if she stayed behind, she would be sitting alone.

“I don’t want to intrude,” Laurie says.

“Shut up,” Bender says before Andy can. “It’s a library. You wouldn’t be intruding on anything.”

“I would hope not,” Andy mutters, earning his hand a tight, chastising squeeze from Allison. 

“Do you think they’ll stop us?” Brian asks, dropping his voice.

“Not if we walk with purpose,’ Claire says and Bender snorts. 

“Lead the way, Princess,” Bender says and then they’re off. 

Like Claire suggested, they walk with purpose, and no one stops them or even gives them a second glance. Andy holds Allison’s hand the whole time, walking through the hallways they used to frequent as kids.

Luckily for them, the library door is unlocked and they slip inside without detection. The first thought that crosses Andy’s mind when they pass through the doorway is that the room looks a lot smaller than he remembered it being.

“This is a bit surreal,” Allison says quietly. When Andy looks at her, he sees her gaze locked on the table in the back. “It’s still set up the same way.”

“They’re lazy assholes,” Bender says and he slips his arm around Claire’s waist. 

“C’mon,” Andy whispers, pulling on Allison’s hand. “Follow me.”

They slip away from their friends, who have split off into couples, and make their way up to the second level. He sits on one of the benches, Allison pressing her leg against his. 

“What are you thinking?” Allison asks, her hand on his knee.

“That this is weird,” Andy says. “That I love you. I loved you here.”

“I love you too,” Allison says. “We were different people when we were here.”

“Not that much different,” Andy says, leaning his head against hers. “I hope that I’m less of a jerk now.” He thinks back to the things he said in detention, the things he accused Bender of.

“You are,” Allison says. “Look at you and Bender. You’re practically best friends now.”

He smiles, warm with the knowledge that someone knows him well enough to basically read his thoughts. 

“We’re getting married,” Andy says. “To think, if Vernon never sent us out to get those Cokes…”

“I never would have known that the jock I saw around school sometimes had important things to say,” Allison says with a glint in her eye.

“Shut up,” Andy says, but he kisses her anyway. 

The room is quiet, and Andy has never been more happy than he is right in this moment. 

~~

“Which was your seat?” Laurie asks, rubbing her hand up and down Brian’s back. She follows him as he walks to the desk to the right and places his hand on the table.

“Right here,” he says, his gaze dreamy and far away.

Laurie doesn’t fully understand Brian’s friend group and their attachment to the memory of detention. They met here and against all odds, they became friends, but Laurie can’t comprehend how a table in a library could make her fiancé look the way he is right now. She follows his look down to the table.

“You carved your name here?” Laurie asks, dragging her finger over the weathered letters.

“Yeah,” he says. “I wanted to leave a mark.”

She traces over the words. _Brian ’84. The Nerd._ , they say. She smiles despite herself, thinking back to how sweet Brian was that year and how much she liked him, even though she was trying not to.

“Hey,” he says, reaching over and covering her hand with his. “Come somewhere with me?”

Laurie doesn’t even answer, just furrows her brow, before Brian is pulling her along behind him and out of the library. 

Before she can ask where they’re going, Brian pulls her down a hallway and into a classroom. It takes her a few seconds to realize where she is due to the updated equipment. She’s being pressed against the door before she can even get a word in.

“You’re such a romantic,” she says after he pulls away from a kiss. “I didn’t know what I was doing. I made you _pasta_.”

“And I loved it,” Brian says before leaning down and pressing a kiss to the under side of her chin. “Although at first, I thought you were making fun of me.”

“Really?” Laurie asks. She never knew that, but with the way that she had been acting back then, she can see how he may have thought that. 

“I didn’t know what to make of your attention,” Brian says, pressing his thumbs to her hips. 

Laurie grabs Brian’s face between her hands and pulls him so they’re nose to nose. “I liked you so much,” she says. “I didn’t know what to do with all of it.”

Before he can respond with something sickeningly sweet, Laurie leans in and kisses him. Under the fluorescent lights in the home ec classroom, she loves him how she has always wanted to.

~~

“I wanted you so bad,” Bender says as he stands between her legs in front of the table. “You were sitting right there in that skirt and I wanted you.”

Andy and Allison had escaped upstairs a while ago and when Claire saw Brian and Laurie leave, she had leapt onto the desk and looked up at her husband.

“You were an asshole that day,” Claire says back, winding her fingers in the hair on the back of his neck. “You wouldn’t stop calling me a tease.”

“It felt like you were at the time. I liked you, I thought you were hot, and you didn’t like me.”

“I liked you,” Claire says while Bender leans down and buries his face in her neck. “Against my better judgement, of course. You’re lucky I didn’t come to my senses.”

“Who knows what would have happened if you did,” Bender says and then presses a kiss to the skin beneath his lips. 

“You would have turned out fine,” Claire whispers. She believes it too, knowing him better than anyone else. “You’ve always had it in you. I had nothing to do with it.”

Bender pulls back and shakes his head. “You had everything to do with it. You know that.”

“You realize you did the same for me,” Claire says. “I would have turned out just like my parents.”

“I don’t know about that,” Bender says.

“Agree to disagree, then,” she says. “I wanted you too. I liked the flannel.”

“The _flannel_ is what did it for you?” 

“Among other things,” she says, brushing her thumb across his cheek bone. He leans down to kiss her softly.

“If you hadn’t skipped school to go shopping, none of this would have happened.”

“I wouldn’t have that leather jacket either.”

“That would be a real shame.”

When they first got together, Claire assumed that Bender would treat her badly. She was wrong, of course, but she wondered if he would spit vitriol at her like he did that day in detention.

He kept her at arms length for a while which worried her but she wore him down over time. She doubted him because she couldn’t help it, everyone she’d ever counted on had let her down.

But everything is different now, they’re raising a family, and she trusts him more than anyone else on the planet. It all started here, at this desk, in this place, and she’s never been more thankful.

~~

When the group makes it back to the gym, the crowd has thinned out significantly. Allison looks over at Claire, and when their eyes meet, Allison knows that it’s over. 

“We survived,” Bender says. “Can we cut our losses and go?”

“Yes please,” Allison adds. 

On their way out, they’re offered gift bags full of Shermer High merchandise. Allison barely offers it a second glance before passing hers off the Andy. 

Allison links arms with Claire as they walk out the doors, leaving their old high school behind. 

She doesn’t mind leaving the past in the past, as long as her future is this, with these people. 

“Dinner at Linguine’s next week?” Brian asks as they reach their cars. 

“Sounds great,” Claire says. She pulls her arm from Allison’s and pulls her into a tight, fierce hug. Allison tucks her face into her best friend’s neck and smiles.

When she lets go, everyone starts hugging, acting like it’s the last time they’ll ever see each other. Allison wraps her arms around Laurie, then Brian, and finally Bender.

“Nutcase,” Bender mumbles as a goodbye.

Allison feels Andy slide his arm around her waist. It grounds her like it always does when she feels like she’s floating away. 

“Well,” Claire says, standing next to Bender and looking at all of them. “See you later.”

Allison looks at her friends one by one, realizing how much they’ve changed. Claire is much less insecure and she owns it. Bender has learned how to let people in and is a better father than anyone could have expected. Brian wears his confidence on his sleeve and Laurie is his rock, a constant calming presence that keeps him grounded and pulls him out of his head when he gets lost up there. And Andy, he’s in a different category altogether. Allison is grateful for his trust everyday.

Despite the change, they’ve all managed to stay together, and Allison thinks that’s pretty incredible.

“See you,” Laurie says. 

As they walk away from each other, Allison feels a weird sinking in her stomach. She doesn’t know why, especially since they’ve made plans to see each other within the week, but leaving the reunion feels like the end of a story somehow.

“What are you thinking?” Andy asks after they settle in their parked car.

“I don’t know,” Allison says. “I can _feel_ my life changing in this moment. I can see it.”

Andy pauses for a moment, looking at her from the driver’s seat. When he speaks next, he says, “Am I still there next to you, in this changing life of yours?”

He’s smiling, obviously teasing her, but Allison reaches out and brushes his cheek with the light pressure of her thumb. “You _are_ this life.”

Andy turns his head and presses a kiss to the palm of her hand. “I’m honored,” he says. “You’re mine, too.”

“I’m just-“ she cuts herself off, looking out the windshield at the school and then over at her friends’ cars as they pull out of the parking lot. “I didn’t realize so much had changed.”

When Allison drops her hand, Andy catches it. He rubs his thumb over her fingers tenderly, in a way that makes Allison feel known. “So much has changed,” Andy says, “but we’re still us, and they’re still them. It’s always going to be that way.”

“Always?”

“We won’t let you get away with leaving again, if that’s what you’re asking,” Andy says, eyes twinkling with amusement before turning serious again. “We’re family, as good and real as blood.”

Allison leans over and presses a lingering kiss to his mouth. “Okay,” she says.

“Ready to go?” Andy asks. She leans back so they can both put their seatbelts on.

“Onwards and upwards,” Allison says, and he puts the car in drive.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And fin! 
> 
> Thank you to everyone who has stuck with this fic series. This started as a fun little writing exercise but then it turned into, well, this. I started with the first installment in this series my freshman year of college and now I'm about to graduate. It's crazy how fast time flies!
> 
> But seriously, thank you to everyone who read this story and liked what I did with the characters. I hope I did my favorite movie justice.
> 
> For now, I'm done writing for the Breakfast Club, but you never know what the future may bring. I'll continue to write for other fandoms, so stick around if you want to!
> 
> Thanks for all the love and support. Let me know what you think!
> 
> -trouvailleamor

**Author's Note:**

> Additional Spoiler Warnings for pregnancy and child birth.
> 
> Happy Thanksgiving to all my American readers! Here is the first chapter of an epilogue because I can't seem to let these characters go. I'm not sure when the next part will be posted, but in the meantime, drop a kudos and a comments to let me know if you like it so far! Thank you for reading and I hope you liked it!


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